I think it's too much

Casadena · October 23

Dear Prudence,

How old is too old for trick-or-treating? I wasn’t allowed to go when I was a child (my parents considered Halloween demonic), and the first time I EVER trick-or-treated, I was 14. The other times I got to go, I was 17 and 18 and went out with a group. I knew even then I was WAY too old, but I justified it by saying that I was making up for lost time.

However, last year, a few of my college friends and I went out as a joke. We expected to be laughed off each doorstep and instead received candy without comment at nearly every house. Maybe it’s just common in college towns, or I look younger than I am, but I actually had so much fun I want to go again this year. I thought 17 was pushing it—is 22 over the limit?

—Child at Heart

banana468 · October 23

I think it's time to celebrate without trick or treating.

levioosa · October 23

Do you have any friends with kids or younger cousins you can go with? You're a bit old. Or throw a party with your friends and set up fake "booths" around the house that everyone treats like T-o-T-ing.

Tbh I think I was 20 or 21 the last time I went. But I also looked 15. I wore a costume my mom made for me when I was 7 and it still fit (genuinely, not in a hoochy college "fit" way).

charlotte989875 · October 23

Honestly- I’d give candy to 22 year old kids who were out having fun, being kind, and being good neighbors. The world is a dumpster fire we need more simple joy.

VarunaTT · October 23

charlotte989875 said:

Honestly- I’d give candy to 22 year old kids who were out having fun, being kind, and being good neighbors. The world is a dumpster fire we need more simple joy.

This is where I am. As long as they were nice and having fun, it's just candy.

Casadena · October 23

I wouldn't turn anyway at my door, but if the 22 year old is asking whether they SHOULD? Yeah, no, i think it's a little obnoxious.

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VarunaTT · October 23

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ei34 · October 23

I love that many of my high schoolers still ToT. 22? Yeah, kind of old, but I wouldn't turn a young adult away if they were genuinely enjoying. (If I handed out candy. I'm always with the kids trick or treating and just leave a big bowl outside, who knows who's coming by for it?)

Maybe LW could participate in trunk or treat events leading up to Halloween, to soak in the fun? Those are getting more popular each year (by me anyway).

short+sassy · October 23

VarunaTT said:

charlotte989875 said:

Honestly- I’d give candy to 22 year old kids who were out having fun, being kind, and being good neighbors. The world is a dumpster fire we need more simple joy.

This is where I am. As long as they were nice and having fun, it's just candy.

I was 12 the last time I went trick or treating. I had two different households who still gave me candy, but made a comment like, "Aren't you a little old to be trick or treating?" That's why it was the last time I went. They made me feel bad and like I had done something wrong. But now as an adult, I think they were jerks and wonder why they'd be snarky to a kid on a fun holiday.

If a friend was asking me if 22 was too old to go trick or treating, I'd tell them it was unless they had a child in tow. But if a single or group of young adults showed up at my house to trick or treat, I'd laugh about it and give them candy.

flantastic · October 23

I think LW needs to accept that there are things she missed out on doing, and if I'm asked whether 22 is too old to trick or treat, I'm going to say yes.

But neither will I be shaming any groups of any age who are out having fun and being polite.

downtondiva · October 23

I stopped going trick-or-treating for a few years when I was 10 or 11, then went a few more times with friends when I was in junior high/early high school. I remember some friends suggesting going our junior year of HS and I declined. I had other things to do that day and felt like I had aged out of it by then.

If you showed up at my door trick-or-treating at 22, I'd give you candy and not say anything as long as you weren't shoving little kids out of the way or anything like that. But I'd also think it was a little odd, if I'm being honest.

banana468 · October 23

flantastic said:

I think LW needs to accept that there are things she missed out on doing, and if I'm asked whether 22 is too old to trick or treat, I'm going to say yes.

But neither will I be shaming any groups of any age who are out having fun and being polite.

It seems like this is in that vein of we shouldn't tell someone they're too old to do it but they may want to consider not doing it.

Like....you don't call out people and say, "Where's my wedding gift?" but if you went to their wedding you should give them one.

LW may need to find a different celebration. That said 22 yos are likely in more debt than ever and that candy goes far!

levioosa · October 23

I think 2 years ago we had a bunch of grown ass dudes, like 19-24 ToT at our house. They were giggling like a bunch of toddlers. Weird, but also kind of funny. Whatever, they got some candy. They found some joy and they weren't being disruptive or destructive. Ohhh noooo.

I think it's too much

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