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not your problem

CasadenaCasadena member
Knottie Warrior 2500 Comments 500 Love Its Name Dropper
in Wedding Woes

Dear Prudence,

How do you help someone understand that they could solve a lot of their problems by changing the way they post on social media? They need to separate personal posts and business posts, but refuse because they say, “If you don’t like what I post, I don’t want to do business with you.”

This is a person I knew in high school. They get really defensive and share way too much personal information, and also get very political. In the midst of all that, they are trying to find customers for their photography business. They can’t figure out why people aren’t calling. I truly believe a big part of it is what they post. The financial issues are causing her major problems. Any suggestions?

—Concerned Friend

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Re: not your problem

  • charlotte989875charlotte989875 member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Not your circus, not your monkeys.
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  • banana468banana468 member
    Knottie Warrior 25000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Not your issue.

    The former first selectman in my town has gone full on MAGA and also owns his own business.  I've told DH we will NEVER support it.  He knows what he's doing.  
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  • levioosalevioosa member
    Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    SIL B is an oversharer on Social Media. All of us have tried gently mentioning at some point (in the context of different conversations) that she might want to think about scaling back or at least delaying posts. Like yes? You were going to get in trouble at work because you were "WFH" but you were posting pictures of yourself actively on a trip? Use your common sense? 


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  • ei34ei34 member
    Knottie Warrior 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    If the friend asked me directly, I'd tell her.  If she's just wondering in a vague way, I'd stay out of it.  
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  • downtondivadowntondiva member
    Knottie Warrior 1000 Comments 500 Love Its Name Dropper
    You describe this person as "someone I knew in high school." That sounds like someone you're not close to and who isn't looking for your advice. Stay out of it and don't make their problem your problem.
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  • short+sassyshort+sassy member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    ei34 said:
    If the friend asked me directly, I'd tell her.  If she's just wondering in a vague way, I'd stay out of it.  

    I was wondering about this.  They say it's someone they knew from high school, which sounds like they're just acquaintances.   In that scenario, it would be inappropriate for the LW to say something.

    But then they seem to know this person's financial issues are causing her major problems.  Does she post about that also or are they closer friends than I am thinking?

    If this woman mentions her business issues specifically on SM, I think it's okay to send her a private message through the same platform.  Or lightly mention it, if she complains in person.  But she probably isn't going to listen anyway and it could hurt their friendship.
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