Dear Prudence,
My wonderful boyfriend and I have been dating for nearly three years. This summer, we moved in together. This has brought us closer, and our relationship has flourished. We have discussed marriage, and I hope that it will be only a matter of time before we take that step. I grew up Catholic, while my boyfriend was “saved” (his words) during high school. My boyfriend’s relationship with God is something I admire, but his recent soul searching is somewhat troubling.
Specifically, he has decided that premarital sex is a no-no—although we’ve been sexually active since early in our relationship. Not only do I disagree, but I find this change somewhat hurtful and offensive. I view sex as an essential expression of a loving relationship. I have said this, but all he can articulate is that he’s not sure what he feels and that he’ll continue to pray. Do I allow him to explore this new relationship with God and accept that the dynamic of our relationship has changed? Or do I attempt to convey to him why I feel differently and hope that things will go back to the way they were?