Dear Prudence,
Two years ago, my sister and my husband announced that they were in love and that my husband would be divorcing me and marrying her. They also told our mutual friends that they would have to choose between them and me. Well, my ex-husband and sister are both extremely charming and rich, so the majority of our friends chose them.
It was devastating, as you can imagine. I was in intensive therapy for a year, and it helped immensely. I still see my therapist biweekly, but I’m in a good place. I have forgiven them (for my sake, not theirs), and I no longer feel the burning hatred and anger that I did in the first year. I truly feel that I have healed and moved on.
My problem is that my subconscious has not moved on with me. At least once a week, I have violent, graphic nightmares about harming my sister and my ex. I don’t normally have a violent bone in my body, and the dreams are deeply upsetting. I know this must indicate that I’m not truly over what happened, but when I’m awake, I feel completely fine! Is there anything I can do to stop these horrible nightmares? I’m a very pragmatic person, but it’s gotten so bad that I’m even willing to consider more “woo-woo” options.
—Nightmare Nuisance