Dear Prudence,
Over the holidays, my extremely religious aunt told me how much she loves me and gave me a beautiful jumper that she’d knitted and a lovely book of poetry. I was really touched until I overheard her talking to my mother about me.
She was telling her how sad she was that I was going to burn in hell because I’m a lesbian and living in sin with “another whore.” I pretended not to overhear that conversation because a confrontation would have very quickly resulted in my mother’s sister getting kicked in the cooch, but having left that battle unfought, I’m now faced with the painful need to send a thank-you letter for her kind gift. I am genuinely touched, even if I now want to burn it, and having not addressed the situation at the moment, it feels cowardly to bring it up from a distance. Should I just let things lie to maintain the peace? Should I try to make a snarky remark? Or should I confront her comments head-on, knowing it will spark family divisions and solve nothing?
—Hell-Bound Lesbian