Dear Prudence,
My husband’s mother, “Louise,” came to live with us a couple of months ago after her husband ran off with his assistant. Louise has never been great with boundaries, but the other day she crossed a major red line.
I had a collection of sex toys, and when I went to use one, I found all of them missing! Suspicious, I confronted my MIL who admitted to throwing them in the trash. Her excuse was that I shouldn’t need them because her son “ought to be enough” for me! She threw them out the night before the garbage was picked up, so they’re gone. My husband agrees she did the wrong thing, but has tried to minimize it by saying Louise was “coming from a place of care.” Fuck that! I am outraged that she would not only go through my private things, but think she had a right to dispose of them! I feel an incredible sense of violation and want her to move out. My husband isn’t willing to give her a deadline. What’s the solution?