"You may kiss the bride"

Re: "You may kiss the bride"

• mbcdefg member

  

  May 2010 edited December 2011

  I didn't know he was going to say it, but the priest said it softly to us so we knew that we could kiss. Because it doesn't come at the end of the Catholic ceremony, like many secular ceremonies and TV shows/movies show it, so it wasn't in an "obvious" point in the ceremony. I don't know if our guests heard him say it (plus his mic wasn't turned on, lol).
  
  Couldn't hurt to ask, but just remember that things sometimes vary by individual parish and priest. So if yours has a set way of doing things, he may not be willing to include different things in the ceremony. But ask and see.

  

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• Theresa626 member

  

  May 2010 edited December 2011

  Most of them won't say it because it's not part of the liturgy.  it disappoints me too.  Also, you don't kiss right after you get married.  You get married and do the rings, then there's the whole liturgy of the eucharist and all of those songs and prayers then after that, he calls you up for the nuptial blessing. After the nuptial blessing at the very end of the mass, he announces you with your new married name.  At that time, you are supposed to kiss even though he doesn't say it and people are supposed to applaud.  I think you should rehearse it because I've seen it where the couple forgot to do it because he didn't say it or one person remembered and leaned in and the other looked surprised so it was awkward.  I doubt you'll get your priest to say it unless he is pretty liberal.  

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• [Deleted User] member

  

  May 2010 edited December 2011

  I don't think it is used anymore either. The last Catholic wedding I went to I don't believe they said it, just pronounced them husband and wife like pp said. I do agree that it depends on your parish and/or priest if he allows it or not. Our priest is very strict and I already know the answer if I were to ask, so I am not going to bother. We couldn't even have the Wedding March bc it is secular.

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• jeanna85 member

  

  May 2010 edited December 2011

  At the last catholic wedding i went to, he didnt say it, and for some reason the bride didnt realize that it was time to kiss so the groom leaned in and the bride was looking out at the audience. he basically missed haha. ive heard that most wont say it, but they may whisper it (my cousin said at his wedding the priest whispered "kiss her"). i would guess most priests wouldnt mind saying it unless theyre super by the book traditional 

  

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• Calypso1977 member

  

  May 2010 edited December 2011

  ours did not say it, nor did he announce "you are now husband and wife" .  i was ok with both.
  
  we were married first, then had the mass (in the Latin, you are married at the beginning, not during hte Mass).  our first kiss was after we walked down the aisle and we kissed in the doorway of the church.

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• mbcdefg member

  

  May 2010 edited December 2011

  We weren't announced as "the new Mr. and Mrs. X," and "you are now husband and wife" wasn't announced, either.
  
  He asked the audience to show their support by applause at one point, before the kiss. And then when the actual kiss came, no one applauded and I remember whispering to DH at that point, "Um, why didn't anyone clap for us?" lol
  
  We kissed again at the Sign of Peace. I forget if we did it again at the very end or not before we processed out.

  

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• smore154

  

  May 2010 edited December 2011

  I don't know if our priest will do it- we haven't gotten to that point yet. I wasn't expecting him to though. We just went to a catholic ceremony last fall and the priest had a BIG problem being asked to say that at the wedding. He also told the couple he has never seen people kiss at the end of the wedding ceremony (aahhhh yeah, a little dramatic). I guess at the end he didn't say anything, but they just kissed anyways. I don't think our priest is that harsh. But I haven't heard any catholic priests say it out loud.

  

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• portia.young

  

  May 2010 edited December 2011

  I KNOW!!!  I have been dreaming of hearing those words FOREVER!!  Now that I'm the bride, I'm going to ask my priest (he's really awesome) if he would please say those words.  

  
  

  I've been to two Catholic weddings this spring and the audience (mostly Lutheran) didn't know when they were actually married!  It was way awkward.  They exchanged the rings and then did the 'kiss of peace.'  Confusing.  I'm hoping Father Don will say it after we do our Greek crowning ceremony (we're adding that because my FI is Greek Orthodox).  OPA!

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• clearheavens member

  

  May 2010 edited December 2011

  I totally feel for you.  I've been dreaming of the same thing.  What I would do is ask your priest what he usually does via e-mail now so you know what you're in for and you're not waiting forever to imagine how your Big Day will be.  Then I would finalize the plan during the rehearsal.

  
  

  btw, if you don't get to kiss right after the Rite of Marriage, don't feel bad.  Most Catholics in other parts of the world don't get to, as it appears that only American Catholics kiss after the Rite of Marriage (or those on TV).
  

  
  
  

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• meamolly member

  

  May 2010 edited December 2011

  It wasnt said at my sister's wedding and it actually made for a funny picture moment. The photographer had to stop them before they got of the alter so they would kiss! everyone is laughing in the background of the picture.

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• annagtz82

  

  August 2010 edited December 2011

  I had never noticed that the the priest doesn't say "you may now kiss your bride" in catholic ceremonies. What a bummer.

  
  Maya
  (ISSR Shiloh Shepherd)
  
  

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