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August 2012 Weddings
What would you do????
So we went for our tasting yesterday at our venu, and picked out our menu. My parents went with us for this, and we hashed out the details of the day and event with the banquet coordinator. Then we got to the discussion of the bar......
It is not normal for there to be an open bar in our area. About 90% of weddings in our area do a cash bar. From the start we wanted to host pop, iced tea, water, and lemonade. Then have a keg of Bud Light and a keg of Blue Moon hosted. FI and I had said we would be paying for that since we knew it wasn't something that was usually done, and it was something we both wanted. It also wasn't in my parents' original budget that they had given us.
Well my dad told the banquet manager yesterday that he wanted an open bar for the night, and would be paying for it. She warned him of how much the average open bar ends up being in our area, and how much he would expect to pay. She said to expect between $5-6,000. Both FI and I explained to my dad there that we did not expect that from them, and do not necessarily want an open bar. (FI's step-mom's side of the family are major alcoholics and enjoy getting stupidly drunk and causing a mess).
So, my dad offered to us afterwards that he will give us $6,000 to put towards an open bar, and we can choose whether we want to have it or not. Then if we decide not to have it, we can just pocket that money and use it to pay off debt, save for something we want, or use it towards the honeymoon.
Here's where we're at.
1. We would kind of like to have an open bar, but we know it isn't expected around here and our guests are used to a cash bar.
2. We had only planned to host keg beer and pop from the start, so we know we would be fine with keeping our original game plan and just pocketing the extra cash.
3. We don't need the money and feel kind of bad if the money is intended toward the wedding and we choose to use it towards something else.
4. We also have a fear that we're going to wish we would have had an open bar. Any wedding we've been to that has had one, we've found we stay much longer than we normally would, and everyone has a blast.
5. We don't want to look back a year from now and wish we would've had one. We also don't want to look back and wished we would have taken that money to save up for something we wanted.
What would you ladies do?
It is not normal for there to be an open bar in our area. About 90% of weddings in our area do a cash bar. From the start we wanted to host pop, iced tea, water, and lemonade. Then have a keg of Bud Light and a keg of Blue Moon hosted. FI and I had said we would be paying for that since we knew it wasn't something that was usually done, and it was something we both wanted. It also wasn't in my parents' original budget that they had given us.
Well my dad told the banquet manager yesterday that he wanted an open bar for the night, and would be paying for it. She warned him of how much the average open bar ends up being in our area, and how much he would expect to pay. She said to expect between $5-6,000. Both FI and I explained to my dad there that we did not expect that from them, and do not necessarily want an open bar. (FI's step-mom's side of the family are major alcoholics and enjoy getting stupidly drunk and causing a mess).
So, my dad offered to us afterwards that he will give us $6,000 to put towards an open bar, and we can choose whether we want to have it or not. Then if we decide not to have it, we can just pocket that money and use it to pay off debt, save for something we want, or use it towards the honeymoon.
Here's where we're at.
1. We would kind of like to have an open bar, but we know it isn't expected around here and our guests are used to a cash bar.
2. We had only planned to host keg beer and pop from the start, so we know we would be fine with keeping our original game plan and just pocketing the extra cash.
3. We don't need the money and feel kind of bad if the money is intended toward the wedding and we choose to use it towards something else.
4. We also have a fear that we're going to wish we would have had an open bar. Any wedding we've been to that has had one, we've found we stay much longer than we normally would, and everyone has a blast.
5. We don't want to look back a year from now and wish we would've had one. We also don't want to look back and wished we would have taken that money to save up for something we wanted.
What would you ladies do?
This discussion has been closed.
Re: What would you do????
Hope that helps : )
I also have to say I think 5-6k is a WAY overestimte on an open bar.Accodring to this article I just read I live in one of the top 5 most expensive places in the US to host a wedding.
With that said, our open bar (full open bar, mid shelf brands) is costing us $2000. If we went to top shelf brands, we would be paying around $3500.
Unless you ahve a 300 person guest list I can not imagine that you would spend tha tmuch money.
The other option is to put a $2000 cap on the bar, THe drinks are free until you reach that cap- say for 2 hours open bar- then it is cash after that. That's plenty of time for people to et loosened up and prohibitive for the people that like to booze to get too drunk.
Also, don't forget your venue likely has an insurance policy. Ask them if they are TIPS certified. This means they have the right to and are legally bound to cut someone off they think is too drunk.
167 Invited
The amount we're basing it on is my cousin's wedding last fall. She had a full open bar during cocktail hour and dinner, then switched it to just the draft beer and wine for the rest of the night. They spent $2,800 for that, at the same venue as we have. So we figured 7 hours worth of open bar, during cocktail hour, dinner, and till midnight.
Our guest list is at 275 people, and we're "planning for" 250 guests.
We're just afraid things will get out of hand with FI's step-mom's family, but we know at my cousin's wedding we wouldn't have stayed as long as we did if it was a cash bar.
167 Invited
My parents are also giving us $$ to do whatever we want with whether to cover wedding expenses, or pocket. We are sticking to our frugal budget because that $$ will be much better spent constructing a future rather than throwing a party. Cash bar is the norm here in WI and we are going with that, offering free beer & soda only. Just my opinion.
I think we've decided to go with keg beer hosted all night, and mixed drinks and wine included during cocktail hour and dinner. Then it won't be as expensive as a full open bar all night long. We just are having a hard time fathoming spending that kind of money on booze for the whole night, especially when an open bar isn't the norm for our area.