April 2012 Weddings

B-Party Issue

So my MOH is going through SO much right now. Like just crazy levels of personal stuff and family chaos. She had planned to have my B-party on the 31, the day before my shower, because my 2 OOT BMs would be in town, so this worked perfectly. 

She tells me today that she cannot do the B-party anymore because she has too much going on and she needs to be there for her parents (they are having surgery soon). TOTALLY understand! I told her I was not upset in any way. She is a good friend and I want her to know I don't feel like she has let me down or anything. She has already gone above and beyond. 

That said, my 2 OOT BMs have taken off work to be here that day, and I was also looking forward to going out with them. They still want to come up and hang out as planned. They said we can just call it a night out or something rather than a B-party, so MOH doesn't feel as left out. I talked to MOH about this, and she seemed ok with it, but also kind of like bummed, which is normal. But am I a horrible person for still wanting to see my two other friends and former roommates? I guess what I'm saying is I get that MOH can't be there and I don't hold that against her at all, but her ability to not be there shouldn't keep my BMs from coming up if they want to right?

MOH said something about doing a spa day, but I just kind of tried to get across the point that she has soooo much going on, and she keeps trying to spread herself too thin. I think she is just having a hard time realizing she can't do everything she would like to do, in a perfect world. I'd rather her just admit she has her hands full than to keep trying to make promises she can't keep. That honestly hurts me more. 
April Siggy Challenge-Wedding Escape: Reading HG/dreaming about Peeta.... Image and video hosting by TinyPic Wedding Countdown Ticker Bio-Updated 4/22**

Re: B-Party Issue

  • I don't think it is at ALL unacceptable to spend that time with your other BM's. Although it's a bummer that life decides to make things difficult, your other BM's are just as important, and are driving a long way a way just to come see you and be there for you.

    I can't imagine your MOH being actually MAD, sad, yes, but not angry with you. Not since you describe her as such a good friend. Maybe just the two of you can go out for lunch or get mani's before the wedding?
    Photobucket .:.Marci.:.
    image Of 155 invited:
    image 74 Will rock out the night!
    image 11 Are party poopers!
    image 70 Are procrastinators!
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • edited March 2012
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_april-2012-weddings_b-party-issue?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:05427f07-4ba2-44d6-9271-99a7af1ee5c0Discussion:3aaf4a9f-f895-479e-9747-e43218c4585dPost:9b0641a9-119c-454e-aa3f-210af2cfcf6a">Re: B-Party Issue</a>:
    [QUOTE]I don't think it is at ALL unacceptable to spend that time with your other BM's. Although it's a bummer that life decides to make things difficult, your other BM's are just as important, and are driving a long way a way just to come see you and be there for you. I can't imagine your MOH being actually MAD, sad, yes, but not angry with you. Not since you describe her as such a good friend. Maybe just the two of you can go out for lunch or get mani's before the wedding?
    Posted by marcellah[/QUOTE]



    I agree with this completely... Good luck!
  • Thanks ladies! I just wanted to make sure I wasn't terrible.
    April Siggy Challenge-Wedding Escape: Reading HG/dreaming about Peeta.... Image and video hosting by TinyPic Wedding Countdown Ticker Bio-Updated 4/22**
  • Agree w/ PPs. Good luck and I hope everything goes well
  • I agree, you should still hang out with your other BM's.  Understand that MOH will be sad she can't be there, I don't think she will be mad.  Definitely has a lot going on and she has to realize she can't do everything.  Perhaps you can do something another time just the two of you, dinner, drinks something. 
  • Agree with what everyone said. Have a blast!
  • I also agree...I think that makes perfect sense
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards