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Planning from 9 hours away?!? Help!

LindiLooHooLindiLooHoo member
First Comment
in Chit Chat
My fiance and I are planning our wedding and I'm trying to narrow down wedding venues and dates. I live in FL and my dream wedding is a fall wedding in the mountains of TN. I've found the perfect venue and the perfect price (better than all of the venues I have looked at in FL) and they have one Saturday, a date that works out very well for us, available in October. I want so badly to book it, but I have been discussing (and by that, I mean obsessing over) it with my fiance, Kyle, and he is worried that a lot of his friends (many of whom are still in college) won't show up because of having to drive 9 hours and pay for lodging. I'm also worried about planning from 9 hours away. I'm sure I would have to make several trips up there to book check out florists/bakeries/photographers/food, which could be nice as mini-vacations, but could also become a huge hassel. Have any of you planned you wedding or are currently planning from so far away?
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Re: Planning from 9 hours away?!? Help!

  • SJM7538SJM7538 member
    250 Love Its 500 Comments Second Anniversary Name Dropper

    As far as your planning goes - do you have family or friends in TN that you can stay with when you do have to travel out there? That would make life a lot easier. And you can always try to make multiple appointments for one trip, like see the florist, photohrapher and food vendor all in one trip. Does the venue do the catering as well. They may also have a list of preferred vendors you can check out.

    I think the the level of planning will depend on how much your venue can take care of for you. For example, my food and cake are all being taken care of by the venue and the florist and JP are actually employed by the venue so thats two less things I have to worry about.

    As far as your friends - people do destination weddings all the time. I'm aware this may not be exactly a destination wedding. I'm not trying to sound snarky but if your friends really love you they will support you getting married at your dream location. Just be prepared for some people potentially not being able to make it.

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  • AdeleDazeemAdeleDazeem member
    5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    I planned a wedding in Bermuda from Philadelphia.  The biggest help you can do for yourself is hire a coordinator from the area you want to marry in.  This woman was free for us from our venue and she was a wealth of information.  I'm wasn't too fussy about flowers, photographer, etc.  She said we needed one, I asked her to recommend someone, and I picked from her recs.  Our wedding was beautiful!  I

    If this isn't an option for you, then I highly recommend checking out your local board here to gather recommendations so you don't have to personally meet with every vendor.  Perhaps just one or two from each major category - that will help you pare down traveling.  Plan everything for one or two weekends.  I will say that having a reliable contact person in the area is a definite help.

    I've never not traveled for a wedding.  I've always drove/flew and got a hotel room and I've been to maaaaaaany weddings at this point.  I think guests understand what goes along with attending a wedding.  Will your particular friends want to make the trip?  Only you know that.

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  • MoonlightSilverMoonlightSilver member
    Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its 1000 Comments First Answer
    Are there airports near your ideal location? I wouldn't drive 9 hours to a wedding except for immediate family, but I could certainly fly. 
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  • BulgariHeartBulgariHeart member
    100 Comments Second Anniversary
    edited November 2012
    I planned a wedding from a continent and several time zones away. MH and I made no trips there the whole time and relied on the work of the WCs that came with the venue. To make things easy we kept the list of vendors to a minimum, we did everything through the venue itself as opposed to hiring outside vendors. This meant that we chose not to make taking the cheapest route a priority, we chose to (be prepared and) spend a bit more to avoid potential disasters. 

    As far as attendance, this is really up to you and your FI to decide. What is your priority, have close to 100% attendance or have your dream location?

    ETA - Coming back to add that the wedding was a total, hitch-free success. The WCs couldn't have done a better job, we never regretted our choice to have a DW.
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  • lyndausvilyndausvi mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its
    I planned a wedding in NJ from ST Thomas.   It's wasn't a big deal at all.  I made 2 trips up there before the wedding.   One at 10 months out.  The other at 3 months out.  The coordinator from the venue was great.  Email and instant messeger was heavily used.  








    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
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  • LindiLooHooLindiLooHoo member
    First Comment
    Thanks everyone for your input! We've talked about it over the past couple of days and have talked to our most important friends and family and they have said that they will come. We are going up to check out the venue this coming weekend, making it a "mini-vacation." We'll get to try different restaurants that cater and bakeries in the area (I've already looked some up) so that we'll already have some of that down. If it ends up not working out with that venue, then, hey, we got to take a little vacation!
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