How early can I send out invitations?

Andrea3030 · April 2010

How early can we send out invitations? I know the standard is 6-8 weeks, but my fiance is wanting to send them out waaaay earlier than that (10- 12 months before) so that we can get an idea how many people are actually going to attend. We're having a destination wedding, and have a few options for a reception, but we're finding it really hard to book the most appropriate place without knowing how many people will attend (one place is great for a small group, but not a large one, another place great for a large group, but not for a small one.) We are quite sure only a fraction of the people invited will attend, but I would hate to book a venue and then end up with way more people than can be accommodated. Is it tacky to send out invites so far in advance? Is there a better way to get a better head count besides sending the invites so early? Is the timing of the invites in this case really that big of a deal?

Kristin789 · April 2010

If your wedding is out of the country, and your guests will have to make plans to be gone from their own homes/lives/work for a week PLUS get travel documents and passports, then YES, you need to notify those people very early, like 5 months early.

If your wedding is out of town or out of state, and guests will be able to fly out on a Thursday or Friday, and return on Sunday, then you can follow the traditional guideline below:

Q.How far in advance should you send invitations? What is the proper date to ask for the reply card?
A. Invitations should go out six weeks before the wedding -- that gives guests plenty of time to clear their schedules for the day and make travel arrangements if they are out-of-towners. It also lets you make the RSVP date a little earlier -- say three weeks before the wedding date -- so you can get a final head count and start making a seating chart (if you'll have one) before the final-week-before-the-wedding crunch begins.

BigBangBazinga · April 2010

how can you send an invite without knowing where you are having the ceremony? Also, yes that is way too early.

Just talk to people and gauge if they would be willing to travel that far.

But what do I know I'm new. I'm sure the other ladies will have better advice.

andyandhillary · April 2010

It's not necessarily tacky to send out invites that far in advance but it is silly. Send out Save-the-Dates instead, which even still you send out 6 months in advance. When you send these things too far in advance people lose and forget about them. 6-10 weeks is best for invitations.

FutureMrsTR · April 2010

I would assume your guest list will be smaller for a DW. Maybe talk to people before choosing your reception venue, but sending actual invitations a year out is insane. I know I wouldn't be able to commit or not commit to your wedding that far in advance even if it was a DW and I'm sure a lot of people would have the same problem.

andyandhillary · April 2010

As far as booking a venue, if you are having a DW in Italy and you know most of your tentative guests can't afford a European vacation, then you know that most may not be able to come. How big of a difference in group sizes are we talking here? chances are, not tons of people will be able to come.

baystateapple · April 2010

I can understand wanting to send them out a little early, but 10 - 12 months? By the time the wedding comes around, guests will probably have forgotten that they even RSVP'd.

My advice would be to send out STDs right away, and then, depending on whether or not the destination is out of the country and guests need to get flights, a few months in advance of the wedding. You can also build a wedding website and put the link on your STDs, and put travel/accommodation info on the webpage. But please don't send invites a year out. Not a good plan.

Krysti21 · April 2010

Pick your venue based on how many you are inviting. 10-12 months in advace is way too early for an invitation to go out. Send save the dates at that time, and invitations maybe 10 weeks out if you want it to be early.

brookelynpaisley · April 2010

Are you inviting mostly family? If your wedding is out of the country, you can assume a smaller guest list, since probably mostly family would make the trip. I wouldn't send invitations - but you can send save the dates. If it's destination, my guess is that people will know soon whether or not they'd be going and would mention it. How much smaller of a group are we talking about for the venues?

Andrea3030 · April 2010

Thanks to everyone who replied

We know where the ceremony is going to be...it can accommodate as few or as many as we like. Our "issue" is with the reception venue. Our guest list is 80, but we think maybe 20 or 30 people will actually be attending. I think I'll take the STD card suggestion (never even thought of that...duh.) Since the majority of the invitees are family, I'm sure they will pass the word on whether they plan to attend or not through the family grapevine, and we'll be able to make a somewhat better estimate and look for an appropriate venue that way.

beamer84 · April 2010

Why don't you make an A and B list of guests? Then pick a venue that you could afford if everyone came, but have the total that the venue accomodate only equal your A list total. You could send invites out 2-3 months in advance to A list, and send them out to B list once you get some "regrets" from the A list guests.

How early can I send out invitations?

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