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Hawaii

Dissed or not??

so let me put it out there first that my wedding is a same sex wedding. My partner Jenny and I have been together for 5 years and are ready to take the next step!

So... I saw a lot of you post that Cherie was a great planner. Well I emailed her trying to get some helpful info. I received a reply today and she informed me that her company did exclude same sex marriages but they do not have any experience with same sex marriages. So instead of giving me the info anyways and talking to me about things she insists that I search other sites who would be better equipped to help me in my situation.

Really... MY SITUATION?!!!!

Needless to say I'm a little ticked off.

If any of you reading this agree with her or have a issue with gay, lesbian whatever you wanna call it please do not comment because I don't want to read any negative comments. Please & Thank you

Re: Dissed or not??

  • maui2011maui2011 member
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011

    Damn skippy i would be too...i don't know her but i am surprised at her response.  Sweat not there are many capable WC's on Maui. Brea seems to be getting a really good deal with hers and sld0618 really likes hers too...you should PM them. Hang in there! J. :-)

  • edited December 2011
    Wow thats pretty messed up she basically sent you away! Im not using a wedding planner and its been fine. I dont think kaesha used one either. I agree that brea and sld are very happy with their planners though. And FWIW i think its great that you and your gf are getting married! My mom and her former gf basically raised my sisters and I.
  • AKWinterBrideAKWinterBride member
    Knottie Warrior 1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    I am using Cherise and she has been great.  Do I agree with her decision?  No.  I don't care who marries who, it's really no one else's business. 

    But, if she is taking that stance, then be glad you aren't working with her!  I wouldn't want to work with someone who didn't support what I was doing.  I support you and your marriage 100%!!
    Photobucket Photobucket Anniversary
  • fabutanfabutan member
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Wow, that's shocking...I'm speechless!!  Can't believe she turned you away like that...  If I were you, I'd feel angry too!

    Agree with what everyone else said - there are loads of planners on Maui, who I'm sure would love to work with you.  It's really her loss, if she's turning away good business!  

    As AKWinterBride said, be glad you're not working with her.  It wouldn't feel right, if she's fundamentally not supportive of what you're doing.  It simply wasn't meant to be.  I'm sure you'll find the right person soon!

  • edited December 2011
    Thanks so much everyone!!! We really appreciate your support!!! :)
  • breanessbreaness member
    Fifth Anniversary 1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Wow. That's horrendous. Try talking to Bill from mauidforever. I doubt you'll have any issues with him. If so, I'll try to find you someone. You definitely dont deserve to be treated like that!
  • breanessbreaness member
    Fifth Anniversary 1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    We were also considering marrymemaui when wr were looking for a coordinator and I know they do same sex ceremonies. Best of luck!
  • levellmagittlevellmagitt member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    as a lesbian and at the start of planning my own wedding i am so sorry this happened to you. i have had the same things happen to me when calling local venues and thats why i decided to go outside if atlanta. i am hoping we both have better luck with hawaii. again i am so sorry this happened to you...she didnt deserve your business.
  • carrieoz_76carrieoz_76 member
    2500 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    It's not the same thing at all, we had a couple weird experiences with a couple vendors when we were clear that we wanted a no-religion ceremony.  While it was frustrating at the time, it taught us quickly that this was the wrong vendor for us, and in the end we found people who were simply fantastic to work with and who totally got where we were coming from.

    First, you might want to check our our officiant, Rev. Diana George.  She prides herself on being connected to different forms of spirituality, and not tied to any particular religion.  I definitely recommend her.

    Ours wasn't a same-sex wedding, and I'm not familiar with any WCs who may specialize, but it is pretty common for same-sex couples to get married in Hawaii.  I think you will find someone who's more comfortable with a same-sex wedding.  Our WC was Lori Lawrence at Tropical Maui Weddings, and I couldn't recommend her more highly.  You might give her a call to see if she has any experience with same-sex marriages.  She's super experienced, so I'd be surprised if she hasn't coordinated at least one or two.

    Best of luck.  I'm sure it's really hard to get this kind of response now, but in the long run, you'll be happier knowing that you made the right vendor choices.
  • sld0618sld0618 member
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    :(

    Don't sweat one person.  I've learned this lesson this past week with some family drama.  I'm pretty sure my cousin just isn't happy because I'm getting married before her.

    Google WC's and seriously write every single one of them.  Ask them the same questions and for pricing.  See which one you click with.  I'm with Arabelle from Ancient Weddings.  I do not know her stance, but she just lost her husband...so I'm not sure how many weddings she's taking on and such.  She's super sweet, but just still grieving :(

    Write as many as you can.  Once you narrow down who is good to go, then narrow down by pricing.

    Also, I would go over to the Gay weddings board.  They may offer some help there and maybe someone by chance on that board has had experiences in hawaii and can provide some directions for vendors!
  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_hawaii_dissed-not?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:73Discussion:8663e118-036e-4ade-a4c0-f4f6fa4ac536Post:2cffe50c-8ec4-434a-be46-316d9ea03fb6">Re: Dissed or not??</a>:
    [QUOTE]Wow, that's shocking...I'm speechless!!  Can't believe she turned you away like that...  If I were you, I'd feel angry too! Agree with what everyone else said - there are loads of planners on Maui, who I'm sure would love to work with you.  It's really her loss, if she's turning away good business!   As AKWinterBride said, be glad you're not working with her.  It wouldn't feel right, if she's fundamentally not supportive of what you're doing.  It simply wasn't meant to be.  I'm sure you'll find the right person soon!
    Posted by fabutan[/QUOTE]
    This.  100%.  Thank you for sharing your experience so others can be aware, and please know we are here to support you!
    image
  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_hawaii_dissed-not?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:73Discussion:8663e118-036e-4ade-a4c0-f4f6fa4ac536Post:f067870a-7519-405e-8c5a-d2e56d64ad01">Re: Dissed or not??</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Dissed or not?? : This.  100%.  Thank you for sharing your experience so others can be aware, and please know we are here to support you!
    Posted by Tanq&Tonic[/QUOTE]

    Oh hells no! I totally agree - definitely take it to the review sites (like the Wedding Channel) and post your experience there. I just wanna punch bigotted people in the mouth.

    Awful, awful, awful.

    We are totally here to support you too!
  • memegracememegrace member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    That is so absurd!!  You and your partner are certainly no different from any other loving couple planning their wedding.  That is too bad and hoping it just pure ignorance that lead to that response.  (not that that makes it excusable by any means) Happy planning from here on forward!! 
  • fabutanfabutan member
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Sorry to post again, but...  FYI - I was browsing some blogs today and came across this company that looks promising:

    It offers different wedding packages at different price points on Maui.  Hope this helps!!  :)

  • breanessbreaness member
    Fifth Anniversary 1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_hawaii_dissed-not?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:73Discussion:8663e118-036e-4ade-a4c0-f4f6fa4ac536Post:d043d6a2-7ef6-439b-9ab1-636307047b74">Re: Dissed or not??</a>:
    [QUOTE]Sorry to post again, but...  FYI - I was browsing some blogs today and came across this company that looks promising: <a href="http://www.marrymemaui.com/mauigaywedding.html" rel='nofollow'>http://www.marrymemaui.com/mauigaywedding.html</a> It offers different wedding packages at different price points on Maui.  Hope this helps!!  :)
    Posted by fabutan[/QUOTE]

    <div>Yep that's the one I talked about before!</div>
  • fabutanfabutan member
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Sorry!  LOL!!  This thread was getting too long that I lost track of the beginning posts  :)

  • destiny1108destiny1108 member
    Sixth Anniversary 100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    sorry to hear that!     Came across this website you can try http://www.engaygedweddings.com/hawaii-gay-wedding.html
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