Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help!

polim22 · June 2012

In a nutshell,

My fiance and I are going to a birthday dinner this Friday for his best friend - and who will be the best man at our upcoming wedding. The issue is his best-friends wife's sister will also be at this dinner. She is a leggy, blond (very attractive and knows it) and has always been interested in my fiance. She goes out of her way to touch, hug, be near (WHATEVER SHE CAN) my fiance.

He says I'm over reacting. She is just friendly and trying to be nice. He is being very naive or doesn't want to upset me.

I need some advice from anyone - for this upcoming friday night. I don't want to appear to be insecure or a b*tch - but I really am nauseous thinking about all the scenarios that could play out this friday.

Help!

starrynight84 · June 2012

Honestly, you do seem a bit insecure. Can you give actual, specific instances where you felt she crossed the line? And take her looks out of it for a moment.

chelseamb11 · June 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_need-a-good-gameplan-for-this-friday-help?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:1b0ed07e-f3dd-465e-a6ce-fed1f80d69d6Post:fadb4dd5-d19d-4853-8456-5e2d71a46c24">Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help!</a>:
[QUOTE]In a nutshell, My fiance and I are going to a birthday dinner this Friday for his best friend - and who will be the best man at our upcoming wedding. The issue is his best-friends wife's sister will also be at this dinner. She is a leggy, blond (very attractive and knows it) and has always been interested in my fiance. She goes out of her way to touch, hug, be near (WHATEVER SHE CAN) my fiance. He says I'm over reacting. She is just friendly and trying to be nice. He is being very naive or doesn't want to upset me. I need some advice from anyone - for this upcoming friday night. I don't want to appear to be insecure or a b*tch - but I really am nauseous thinking about all the scenarios that could play out this friday. Help!
Posted by polim22[/QUOTE]

Is she like this with just your FI or with every guy?
If it's with just your FI, then I don't blame you for feeling uncomfortable. He should be understanding that it makes you uncomfortable and ask her to back off.
If she's like this with everyone, I still don't find it inappropriate for him to ask her to back off, but I also wouldn't worry about it as much either.

brandichamberlain · June 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_need-a-good-gameplan-for-this-friday-help?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:1b0ed07e-f3dd-465e-a6ce-fed1f80d69d6Post:0965b4c4-0d41-49c0-ba41-64280b9d9308">Re: Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help!</a>:
[QUOTE]Is she just a flirty and extremely touchy-feely person? Does she only display this behavior around your FI?<strong> If it were me I'd just sit back and observe. If I felt she stepped over the line, I'd join the conversation and try to steer the focus of attention to well, me. Also you've already informed your FI that she makes you uncomfortable so maybe he'll be more aware of her flirting now. Or maybe you are overreacting. It's hard to say without being a fly on the wall and witnessing it.
</strong>Posted by kodakitty[/QUOTE]

The bolded above.

FWIW, it isn't going to do you any good to make yourself sick over something that could possibly be a non-issue a week away so try not to worry about it too much.

AllAboutTheBenjamin · June 2012

Just ignore it.

I mean yeah it's obnoxious, but she's just going to make herself look like an inappropriate ass if she's touching him all the time. I'd just sit back and let 'er buck, unless your FI seems to be enjoying himself. Then I'd probably rasie a little hell.

kd.joseph · June 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_need-a-good-gameplan-for-this-friday-help?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:1b0ed07e-f3dd-465e-a6ce-fed1f80d69d6Post:0965b4c4-0d41-49c0-ba41-64280b9d9308">Re: Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help!</a>:
[QUOTE]Is she just a flirty and extremely touchy-feely person? Does she only display this behavior around your FI? If it were me I'd just sit back and observe. If I felt she stepped over the line, I'd join the conversation and try to steer the focus of attention to well, me. Also you've already informed your FI that she makes you uncomfortable so maybe he'll be more aware of her flirting now. Or maybe you are overreacting. It's hard to say without being a fly on the wall and witnessing it.
Posted by kodakitty[/QUOTE]

All of this. And let me add, you need to trust your FI regardless of what she does.

If she flirts with him and he doesnt take the bait, than I wouldnt worry too much about it. But, he should make more of an effort to make you feel comfortable since you've made him aware of how you feel. Don't go overboard to prove he's "your man", because in the end it makes you look clingy.

Her on the other hand will be making an arse of herself coming on to someone who is clearly taken.

starrynight84 · June 2012

Where are ya, OP? I want specific behaviors. And I would be specific with FI, too. "Hey, I feel uncomfortable when she does ______________. How should we handle that together if it happens on Friday?"

acaponi87 · June 2012

I'd tell her to eff off.

polim22 · June 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_need-a-good-gameplan-for-this-friday-help?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:1b0ed07e-f3dd-465e-a6ce-fed1f80d69d6Post:9bf5bfa0-e88a-48c8-a9c9-7fab7fc399cf">Re: Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help!</a>:
[QUOTE]Honestly, you do seem a bit insecure. Can you give actual, specific instances where you felt she crossed the line? And take her looks out of it for a moment.
Posted by starrynight84[/QUOTE]

The first time I met her was at the beginning of the year. She came right in between my fiance and I at a party and gave him an enormous hug - nearly knocking me to the ground. When he introduced me - she gave a back handed "hello" then turned her back and kept talking to him - with barely a few inches between them. When it was time to leave the party - and we were saying our good byes - she cornered him and must have hugged him about 4 more times in 1 minute.

I was hurt/furious/upset - a bunch of emotions.

My fiance's sister (my future sister in law) has told me she has been after him for years. She had moved to FL - but now she's back. Lucky me.

My fiance said I have nothing to be upset about. I know he loves me and wouldn't consider her for a second.

I just don't want her to be all over him.

Any advice?

starrynight84 · June 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_need-a-good-gameplan-for-this-friday-help?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:1b0ed07e-f3dd-465e-a6ce-fed1f80d69d6Post:112a9cd6-109b-4496-9b85-d3d1f0f0ca59">Re: Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help!</a>:
[QUOTE]I'd tell her to eff off.
Posted by acaponi87[/QUOTE]

<div>Would you really though? What if she just touches him as she talks (like she does to everyone) or hugs him hello? I personally touch people when I talk to them often and hug everyone hello and goodbye. I assure you, it's not flirtatious at all. If everyone interpreted that way, they must think I have a thing for my own grandmother. </div><div>
</div><div>I still don't think we have enough info to show that this girl is ONLY treating OP's FI this way.</div>

starrynight84 · June 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_need-a-good-gameplan-for-this-friday-help?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:1b0ed07e-f3dd-465e-a6ce-fed1f80d69d6Post:c271ae89-090a-4be7-84ec-25b608834055">Re: Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help! : The first time I met her was at the beginning of the year. She came right in between my fiance and I at a party and gave him an enormous hug - nearly knocking me to the ground. When he introduced me - she gave a back handed "hello" then turned her back and kept talking to him - with barely a few inches between them. When it was time to leave the party - and we were saying our good byes - she cornered him and must have hugged him about 4 more times in 1 minute. I was hurt/furious/upset - a bunch of emotions. My fiance's sister (my future sister in law) has told me she has been after him for years. She had moved to FL - but now she's back. Lucky me. My fiance said I have nothing to be upset about. I know he loves me and wouldn't consider her for a second. I just don't want her to be all over him. Any advice?
Posted by polim22[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>Okay, thanks. So I think four times in one minute is excessive. I would use this specific instance when discussing it with your FI. Just say that you felt uncomfortable and unhappy when she hugged him more than once. What should the two of you do if she attempts it again?</div><div>
</div><div> It's FI's job to handle it at the party and he can come up with a strategy to tell her off nicely that the two of you agree on beforehand. Make this a team effort. If you are the one stomping around and telling her to eff off, you DO look insecure and jealous.

</div>

Starmusica · June 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_need-a-good-gameplan-for-this-friday-help?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:1b0ed07e-f3dd-465e-a6ce-fed1f80d69d6Post:c271ae89-090a-4be7-84ec-25b608834055">Re: Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help! : The first time I met her was at the beginning of the year. She came right in between my fiance and I at a party and gave him an enormous hug - nearly knocking me to the ground. When he introduced me - she gave a back handed "hello" then turned her back and kept talking to him - with barely a few inches between them. When it was time to leave the party - and we were saying our good byes - she cornered him and must have hugged him about 4 more times in 1 minute. I was hurt/furious/upset - a bunch of emotions. My fiance's sister (my future sister in law) has told me she has been after him for years. She had moved to FL - but now she's back. Lucky me. My fiance said I have nothing to be upset about. I know he loves me and wouldn't consider her for a second. I just don't want her to be all over him. Any advice?
Posted by polim22[/QUOTE]

I think there is some really good advice above. Yes- it it icky but as long as you trust FI, you shouldn't worry. Now if you are worried- maybe there is a reason why. If she acts liket his- she will be the one looking like a total ass. I would just try and carefully steer the conversation away from whatever flirty thing she is doing. Hell- steer it towards your wedding.

And hell if all else fails and you wanna be really petty (and hilariously evil) you can ask if she is seeing anyone. If she says no, nod your head sympathetically and tell her, don't worry- you will find someone.

Honestly- the above is mostly a joke- if you truly react to her, you will end up just embarassing yourself.

starrynight84 · June 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_need-a-good-gameplan-for-this-friday-help?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:1b0ed07e-f3dd-465e-a6ce-fed1f80d69d6Post:10eb550a-2a9e-41a9-90c3-6e16fe4448e8">Re: Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help! : I think there is some really good advice above. Yes- it it icky but as long as you trust FI, you shouldn't worry. Now if you are worried- maybe there is a reason why. If she acts liket his- she will be the one looking like a total ass. I would just try and carefully steer the conversation away from whatever flirty thing she is doing. <strong>Hell- steer it towards your wedding. And hell if all else fails and you wanna be really petty (and hilariously evil) you can ask if she is seeing anyone. If she says no, nod your head sympathetically and tell her, don't worry- you will find someone. Honestly- the above is mostly a joke- if you truly react to her, you will end up just embarassing yourself.</strong>
Posted by Starmusica[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>I don't know you but I love you. That is evil. Petty, but evil.

</div>

acaponi87 · June 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_need-a-good-gameplan-for-this-friday-help?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:1b0ed07e-f3dd-465e-a6ce-fed1f80d69d6Post:16d1f1e2-bf70-4b7b-96f7-770f0c623e60">Re: Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help! : Would you really though? What if she just touches him as she talks (like she does to everyone) or hugs him hello? I personally touch people when I talk to them often and hug everyone hello and goodbye. I assure you, it's not flirtatious at all. If everyone interpreted that way, they must think I have a thing for my own grandmother. I still don't think we have enough info to show that this girl is ONLY treating OP's FI this way.
Posted by starrynight84[/QUOTE]

Maybe. I have a feeling OP is probably right. A few years ago when I was dating someone else I had a similar situation. Girl had always known my BF, flirted big time with him, etc. I tried to brush it off and told myself I was being silly. I told him that it bugged me, he said "no you're imagining it". Then after a party though my BF showed me that she had sent him a bunch of texts about how sexy he looked and how she wanted to get with him. I wish I would have told her to eff off.

acaponi87 · June 2012

Realistically, Starry gives good advice though. Talk to your FI, make a game plan and let him take care of it.

starrynight84 · June 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_need-a-good-gameplan-for-this-friday-help?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:1b0ed07e-f3dd-465e-a6ce-fed1f80d69d6Post:85ff79a3-8286-4e16-85a2-8b8b43a49aaa">Re: Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help! : Maybe. I have a feeling OP is probably right. A few years ago when I was dating someone else I had a similar situation. Girl had always known my BF, flirted big time with him, etc. I tried to brush it off and told myself I was being silly. I told him that it bugged me, he said "no you're imagining it". Then after a party though my BF showed me that she had sent him a bunch of texts about how sexy he looked and how she wanted to get with him. I wish I would have told her to eff off.
Posted by acaponi87[/QUOTE]

<div>I agree that I think usually your gut feelings are right. But I didn't know if OP was one of those insecure girls who thought everyoneeee on earth wanted her man!! (The description of the girl made me suspect this). But , after she added details, I think you and she are both right. I still would let FI handle it at the actual party though ( after they both talked it through beforehand).</div>

polim22 · June 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_need-a-good-gameplan-for-this-friday-help?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:1b0ed07e-f3dd-465e-a6ce-fed1f80d69d6Post:10eb550a-2a9e-41a9-90c3-6e16fe4448e8">Re: Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help! : I think there is some really good advice above. Yes- it it icky but as long as you trust FI, you shouldn't worry. Now if you are worried- maybe there is a reason why. If she acts liket his- she will be the one looking like a total ass. I would just try and carefully steer the conversation away from whatever flirty thing she is doing. Hell- steer it towards your wedding. And hell if all else fails and you wanna be really petty (and hilariously evil) you can ask if she is seeing anyone. If she says no, nod your head sympathetically and tell her, don't worry- you will find someone. Honestly- the above is mostly a joke- if you truly react to her, you will end up just embarassing yourself.
Posted by Starmusica[/QUOTE]

That is a really good "zinger". I don't know if I would be cool/calm enough to pull it off though.

starrynight84 · June 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_need-a-good-gameplan-for-this-friday-help?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:1b0ed07e-f3dd-465e-a6ce-fed1f80d69d6Post:66a4bf9a-b3b6-49aa-9e65-ed3aa14bee87">Re: Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help! : That is a really good "zinger". I don't know if I would be cool/calm enough to pull it off though.
Posted by polim22[/QUOTE]

<div>Don't do it. You'd have to really be able to do it so sickly sweetly and serenely for it to work. Like I said, I really think you need to let FI handle it in the moment. </div>

polim22 · June 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_need-a-good-gameplan-for-this-friday-help?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:1b0ed07e-f3dd-465e-a6ce-fed1f80d69d6Post:a6146d82-5927-45c0-83d7-213842c4504d">Re: Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help! : I agree that I think usually your gut feelings are right. But I didn't know if OP was one of those insecure girls who thought everyoneeee on earth wanted her man!! (The description of the girl made me suspect this). But , after she added details, I think you and she are both right. I still would let FI handle it at the actual party though ( after they both talked it through beforehand).
Posted by starrynight84[/QUOTE]

Thanks for the advice. In the momemt - it's sometimes very hard not let emotions get out of control. I will talk with my fiance. He knows me like a book & he may already have thought of me being unnerved over this.

It's just - I would NEVER do this to another female. If a guys is taken - he's taken. This chick is attractive (i'll give her that). But she knows it and she knows what she's doing. Ever met one of them?

starrynight84 · June 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_need-a-good-gameplan-for-this-friday-help?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:1b0ed07e-f3dd-465e-a6ce-fed1f80d69d6Post:69a32248-a550-4fc1-9ac7-78f3197a5ff7">Re: Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help! : Thanks for the advice. In the momemt - it's sometimes very hard not let emotions get out of control. I will talk with my fiance. He knows me like a book & he may already have thought of me being unnerved over this. It's just - I would NEVER do this to another female. If a guys is taken - he's taken. This chick is attractive (i'll give her that). But she knows it and she knows what she's doing. Ever met one of them?
Posted by polim22[/QUOTE]

<div>Yes, I have. </div><div>
</div><div>I think that you know yourself very well and because you don't have an easy time controlling your emotions in the moment, it is even more crucial that you develop a gameplan beforehand and let FI handle it in the moment. </div><div>
</div><div>But don't worry too much about it. It might not even be an issue.</div>

KateJ10 · June 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_need-a-good-gameplan-for-this-friday-help?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:1b0ed07e-f3dd-465e-a6ce-fed1f80d69d6Post:c271ae89-090a-4be7-84ec-25b608834055">Re: Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help! : The first time I met her was at the beginning of the year. She came right in between my fiance and I at a party and gave him an enormous hug - nearly knocking me to the ground. When he introduced me - she gave a back handed "hello" then turned her back and kept talking to him - with barely a few inches between them. When it was time to leave the party - and we were saying our good byes - she cornered him and must have hugged him about 4 more times in 1 minute. I was hurt/furious/upset - a bunch of emotions.<strong> My fiance's sister (my future sister in law) has told me she has been after him for years. </strong> She had moved to FL - but now she's back. Lucky me. My fiance said I have nothing to be upset about. I know he loves me and wouldn't consider her for a second. I just don't want her to be all over him. Any advice?
Posted by polim22[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>If your FI knows this and still allows her to act super friendly, overly-touchy with him, I would be super annoyed. He can set boundaries with this person without being a complete diick. If H knew someone was after him and was ok with the flirty behavior, I would let him have him have it. He shouldn't be telling you it's nothing- he should be telling you - "I'm sorry you feel this way, I will not put up with her acting that way either."

</div>

polim22 · June 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_need-a-good-gameplan-for-this-friday-help?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:1b0ed07e-f3dd-465e-a6ce-fed1f80d69d6Post:85ff79a3-8286-4e16-85a2-8b8b43a49aaa">Re: Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help! : Maybe. I have a feeling OP is probably right. A few years ago when I was dating someone else I had a similar situation. Girl had always known my BF, flirted big time with him, etc. I tried to brush it off and told myself I was being silly. I told him that it bugged me, he said "no you're imagining it". Then after a party though my BF showed me that she had sent him a bunch of texts about how sexy he looked and how she wanted to get with him. I wish I would have told her to eff off.
Posted by acaponi87[/QUOTE]

My inital first reaction - is usually leaving the room. Then I get mad at myself for NOT saying something the moment it happens.

A big part of me totally wants to tell her to "Back -off" - but I don't want to end up being the one who looks like the *ss!

Thanks for understanding me!

polim22 · June 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_need-a-good-gameplan-for-this-friday-help?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:1b0ed07e-f3dd-465e-a6ce-fed1f80d69d6Post:8b47f8c2-e175-4f94-b087-41c6c8e197eb">Re: Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help!</a>:
[QUOTE]Well, if she's truly after your FI, then in a social situation I'd probably try to get to know her better. I'd approach her introduce myself and talk to her. If she was cool I'd stick around, if she was a stick-in-the-mud I'd find others to talk to. Your FI has alreay told you it's nothing to fret over. If she makes an ass out of herself that's her prerogative. Hovering around your FI all night to prevent her from talking to him will look bizarre. I truly wouldn't step in unless things got really out of hand. If that happened, I'd just join the conversation and talk about myself. Though most likely your FI would nip it in the butt if she did anything highly innapropriate. I honestly think this might be a non-issue.
Posted by kodakitty[/QUOTE]

You definitely ooze with way more confidence than I could ever drum up. That's awesome. I wish I had some of that in me.

Starmusica · June 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_need-a-good-gameplan-for-this-friday-help?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:1b0ed07e-f3dd-465e-a6ce-fed1f80d69d6Post:8c23102a-b79f-41f5-8f08-e28ca1a7054b">Re: Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help! : Don't do it. You'd have to really be able to do it so sickly sweetly and serenely for it to work. Like I said, I really think you need to let FI handle it in the moment.
Posted by starrynight84[/QUOTE]

agreed- like I was saying- the problem is that if you react to her, you may end up coming off as the sad/pathetic one, when in reality- if she is going after your man- she is.

kd.joseph · June 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_need-a-good-gameplan-for-this-friday-help?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:1b0ed07e-f3dd-465e-a6ce-fed1f80d69d6Post:4d3aa96c-25b1-43cc-9f8a-33258516fa52">Re: Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help! : If your FI knows this and still allows her to act super friendly, overly-touchy with him, I would be super annoyed. He can set boundaries with this person without being a complete diick. <strong>If H knew someone was after him and was ok with the flirty behavior, I would let him have him have it. He shouldn't be telling you it's nothing- he should be telling you - "I'm sorry you feel this way, I will not put up with her acting that way either."
</strong>Posted by KateJ10[/QUOTE]

Kate makes a good point, my issues would lie with the fact my SO isnt validating my feelings. Some men are dense, that's a given, but if you see it and it bothers you he should make more of an effort to make you feel comfortable. When she went to hug him he could have shut her down right there.

polim22 · June 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_need-a-good-gameplan-for-this-friday-help?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:1b0ed07e-f3dd-465e-a6ce-fed1f80d69d6Post:2274ffd5-75ee-429f-a7a3-7f78882a855e">Re: Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help! : Kate makes a good point, my issues would lie with the fact my SO isnt validating my feelings. Some men are dense, that's a given, but if you see it and it bothers you he should make more of an effort to make you feel comfortable. When she went to hug him he could have shut her down right there.
Posted by kd.joseph[/QUOTE]

I really think he is dense when it comes to this stuff. I will mention it to him. I know him well though - metioning it once - he's okay with it. If I dwell on it - he gets irritated. Because he is focusing in on only the part that I have nothing to worry about - not the part that I DONT want her all over him.

starrynight84 · June 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_need-a-good-gameplan-for-this-friday-help?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:1b0ed07e-f3dd-465e-a6ce-fed1f80d69d6Post:70e52fc8-3faf-4a7c-9cfe-395886d7886a">Re: Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help! : agreed- like I was saying- the problem is that if you react to her, you may end up coming off as the sad/pathetic one, when in reality- if she is going after your man- she is.
Posted by Starmusica[/QUOTE]

<div>Exactly. </div>

Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help!

Re: Need a good gameplan for this Friday - Help!

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