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Jewish Weddings

ketubah question

Our officiant just told us that he'd like the artist doing our ketubah to leave a letter off so it can be finished on the wedding day, according to tradition.  My FI and I have not heard of this before, and we are hesitant to go along.  Our ketubah is a gift to us from a family friend who makes beautiful Judaica artwork.  I'm assuming this is tradition, as he says, and not halachic.  

Does anyone know where this comes from?  Do you think this is something we should go along with?  

(Sorry in advance if this is a double post, I'm having internet issues.)

Re: ketubah question

  • Musicheals71Musicheals71 member
    Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    I never heard of such a thing!  My rabbi, who is Conservative, had no problem with us having the ketubah completely personalized ahead of time.  In fact, he recommended personalization so that the ketubah's writing would be uniform throughout.
  • edited December 2011
    My rabbi told us to do the same. We're leaving off part of the kuf in some word. My Ketubah's artist had it as an option, but usually did it for a different word, so when I told her she understood and was happy to oblige.


  • Musicheals71Musicheals71 member
    Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Is this an Orthodox tradition?
  • edited December 2011
    In Response to Re: ketubah question:
    Is this an Orthodox tradition?
    Posted by Musicheals71
    I'm interested to know that, too.  Our officiant, who we didn't have a preexisting relationship with, is at an unaffiliated shul.  The shul is definitely not Orthodox, but he has past Conservative and Orthodox training/affiliations.  It's something I'd rather not deal with (I know he'd take care of it, but I don't want to have to worry about making sure the ketubah is completed day of), and I am not thrilled that he just asked us to do this without explaining his rationale at all.  

  • edited December 2011
    I don't know the details of this, but I have heard of it. I was converted by a rabbi where we live in south Florida, who asked if we were having part of the kuf left off in our ketubah. We'd never heard of it, and thought it was a very odd question. The rabbi who's marrying us, where we grew up, said he'd never heard of it and told us to get it fully completed to make things easier. We did realize that it was an option on our ketubah artist's website.  I'm guessing it's more of an Orthodox tradition - the rabbi who converted me leans more that way, so that's my best guess.
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  • Musicheals71Musicheals71 member
    Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    I would ask for a thorough explanation, and if you still aren't satisfied, then insist on doing it YOUR way.
  • edited December 2011
    Think of it this way, I grew up Orthodox, when we bought a new torah the last 2 lines were left traced but not filled in. We gave the scribe our name and he would fill in the letter of our first name in that sentence. My hebrew name is Rivka so of course he filled in a rashe.

    Their is great simha, great joy, to complete a jewish work.
  • edited December 2011
    This is very standard.  Reform rabbis would not do it- it is typically done on Orthodox and maybe some Conservative texts.  All it is is a way for the rabbi to "symbolically" seem to be writing the ketubah himself by completing the letter of one word. It is usually the letter kuf but I have also heard of it being an aleph. It is not a big deal and any ketubah artist/company should know what you are talking about and be able to accommodate it. 
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