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May 2013 Weddings
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I have a problem ...

Danny&Mel2003Danny&Mel2003 member
1000 Comments First Anniversary
in May 2013 Weddings
Back when FI & I got engaged I had a lot of "friends" ... There are a couple girls that I had said I wanted coming and we were all gabbing about it before things were set in stone. We've finished our guest list and it needs to be shaved down ... I haven't asked them for there address kind of postponing it.

I don't know what to do ... part of me says you mentioned it the other part of me is saying we don't have the money and maybe I should just explain it to them.

I'm also learning that supposedly every one on my list is able to make it which puts us maxed out money wise I want to cry
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Re: I have a problem ...

  • melb2013melb2013 member
    2500 Comments 25 Love Its Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    First off, just because people say they can come, does not mean that they will actually be able to come.  Life happens- it's 7 months away.  

    I also tend to agree that if you told them you were inviting them, you should.  I tried to keep my mouth shut for a while, but I have one "friend" that I really wish I hadn't said I would invite now.  But I'm still going to invite her because I told her I would.  

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  • Danny&Mel2003Danny&Mel2003 member
    1000 Comments First Anniversary
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_may-2013-weddings_i-have-a-problem?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:ea657a87-d1dc-4588-999f-31c9deeef720Discussion:0402b38b-71dd-48b0-b964-948e49d97945Post:2da64d1d-2b1e-49d5-862c-4374b260890c">Re: I have a problem ...</a>:
    [QUOTE]First off, just because people say they can come, does not mean that they will actually be able to come.  Life happens- it's 7 months away.   I also tend to agree that if you told them you were inviting them, you should.  I tried to keep my mouth shut for a while, but I have one "friend" that I really wish I hadn't said I would invite now.  But I'm still going to invite her because I told her I would.  
    Posted by melb2013[/QUOTE]

    My only argument is when I was saying yes to people we hadnt sat down with a guest list. At the end of the day its our budget holding us back from inviting more people. The other side of the coin is they havent been exactly amazing friend to me.  
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  • MamaBear904MamaBear904 member
    500 Comments
    I would speak with them openly. Tell them your troubles (budget vs guest list) and you may be surprised to hear their response. Early on in the process, when I told one of my BFFs I was engaged, she said to me, "look. you want me there, I am so there. But I also know you're trying to save money, so I completely understand if you have to limit your guests."

    Be open and honest and if they are true friends, they'll understand.

    In my case, FI and I not only already established the guest list, but we sent out STDs to all guests. And all of a sudden he's saying we should cut back. I got upset thinking, you cant just un-invite people! Its a completely different scenario than yours because technically you haven't invited them yet.
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  • Danny&Mel2003Danny&Mel2003 member
    1000 Comments First Anniversary
    In Response to Re:I have a problem ...:[QUOTE]I would speak with them openly. Tell them your troubles budget vs guest list and you may be surprised to hear their response. Early on in the process, when I told one of my BFFs I was engaged, she said to me, "look. you want me there, I am so there. But I also know you're trying to save money, so I completely understand if you have to limit your guests."Be open and honest and if they are true friends, they'll understand. In my case, FI and I not only already established the guest list, but we sent out STDs to all guests. And all of a sudden he's saying we should cut back. I got upset thinking, you cant just uninvite people! Its a completely different scenario than yours because technically you haven't invited them yet. Posted by MamaBear904[/QUOTE]

    Not formally at least ... It just hard. If money weren't an issue I'd invite them all but I'm already over my max number of people.
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