Lurker/ Confessions Thursday

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  HisBelovedOne

  

  February 2011 edited December 2011

  I confess that I'm having a difficult morning. Kidlet was up whining or crying every hour on the hour starting about 12:30 so sleep was interrupted. We've been staying at the duplex with R this week, at the counselor's suggestion, and it's been difficult. We've been getting on each others' nerves more than we've been getting along, and it feels like the things that made me leave in the first place haven't changed. Except the drinking and the constant hanging out with that other girl. He has stopped that. But the rest of it is still the same. Some of his answers on the counselor's compatibility assessment (he insisted that I stay with him when he was doing it, but I refused to coach his responses at all) worry me and some of the differences seem really, really big to me.
  
  So today I'm going to take Scamp to the dog park and let him run - the back yard here isn't fenced and he doesn't get enough "go-go-go-go-go" time that dachshunds need when he's on leash or stuck in the house. While he's running and playing I'm going to sit and process what I need and want. Hopefully we can make that fit with what R needs and wants and get us back to "happy." Because with all the things I'm feeling right now, happy is conspicuously absent.

  

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  trueleo818

  

  February 2011 edited December 2011

  I confess, I've been cheating on my workout and fitness plan. I had ben&jerry's last night.. BUT I'm going to work out today w/ Bikram!

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  DFWIndian

  

  February 2011 edited December 2011

  Sarah -- Honestly, why are you with him still?? Just leave him! Screw what the counselor says. If you are this unhappy I don't understand what would keep you there. To be perfectly honest I can't believe you stayed after he hit your kid!! Your ex did that once already and it makes no sense for you to stay with any man who would do that to him again. I've said it many times now and I've been nice about it, but you have one kid and another one on the way. Your priority should be to those kids not to someone who can't even get his act together. Think about what will happen when you have a screaming newborn in the house with Kidlet and R??

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  temurlang member

  

  February 2011 edited December 2011

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_south-asian-weddings_lurker-confessions-thursday-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:430Discussion:84afa056-d7b9-4857-8444-f05bf5af7dacPost:121afd63-a6df-468d-96ef-2a771aa58c70">Lurker/ Confessions Thursday</a>:
  [QUOTE]I confess I defriended a lot of people off my facebook yesterday. Mostly co-workers and a few people I didn't like too much. I have no clue why I'm friends with them in the first place. Also, I unfriended my one upper friend. I feel bad because I'm invited to her wedding in May even though she not on my list yet. I just can't stand her updates (lovey dovey) and I don't really like her anymore. She stopped hanging out and being my friend after her and her FI got together. I'm feel mean!!
  Posted by DFWIndian[/QUOTE]
  
  I sooo have this feeling sometimes... I'm really picky about accepting friend requests, but you still end up with those "stuck with" people.  In particular, DH has two friends who update their status with really dumb stuff all day long.  I already blocked them from seeing my wall and their updates from showing in my newsfeed.  And then there's the wife of a family friend... I just find her very annoying... But I feel pretty much stuck with these people.

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  HisBelovedOne

  

  February 2011 edited December 2011

  I gave him a second chance because he very contritely swore it'd never happen again. And it hasn't - in all their interactions since then, he hasn't been physically rough with him. Yesterday Kidlet had a 40-minute tantrum for no apparent reason - came and went without a single instance of rough behavior. When we get along, we're fantastic. When we don't, it's usually because we're disagreeing over how to handle Kidlet's fits. He thinks I'm "too soft," and I think he doesn't understand that Kidlet can't communicate like a typical kid and tantrums are his way of expressing anger, frustration, and otehr negative emotions.
  
  The issues on the assessment will be addressed in counseling sessions; I'm at the point, though, where I'm thinking that living over there a week at a time is doing more harm than good. It may be better for now if we don't stay nights over there until we can actually resolve the problems. It feels like our problems are being swept under the carpet and not really resolved. That's the biggest problem, I think.
  
  A family friend and her husband separated a while ago. The situation wasn't the same, but it was similar - a toddler, a baby on the way, only she threw him out for drug addiction and didn't take him back till he was sober. She told me that for a few months they had a hard time getting along when he moved back in too. They managed to repair their relationship with counseling (I'm pretty sure he went into NA, too) and have been happily sharing a house, two kids, and a cat for the past three years. If they can do it... maybe there's still hope. We just have to do it right, which is apparently not the way we've been doing it.

  

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  SonaliPop member

  

  February 2011 edited December 2011

  I confess I feel totally drained. I finally got a job in a horrible market and I love it. I am still at the old job I have but I am busy working both. I am tired and my body just aches. I come home from work to do more work. Before work, I do work. I am desperately looking forward to having some fun.
  
  Also I am very upset and miss my boyfriend very much. I would like to see him soon but no clue when because he recently took 2 weeks off for his sister's wedding in India Who knows when they'll let him know when he can take time off again?
  

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