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I know you guys didn't intend it this way, but something victims of sexual assault get *a lot* is "you should report it, because ... (he might do it again, there might be other victims, he deserves to rot in prison)." Reporting a sexual assault is not an emotionally easy thing to do, and it's not on the victims to put themselves through that if they don't feel it's in their best interest. If we want to see more victims coming forward then we're going to have to create a society where it's safe for them to do so.
This happened 8+ years ago and was committed by someone whom she knew and had a sexual relationship with. All of these things are going to factor into how the police choose to handle the investigation, and they've been shown to work against the victim's believability. Maybe going to the police gives LW an immense amount of closure, or maybe it tears open old wounds, and revictimizes her all over again by putting her actions under the microscope.
Also, does anyone else feel that this was a setup to get back at LW somehow?
I need some time to recover from the shock that Mitch doesn't have a girlfriend.
Yikes. That's one of the most awful things I've ever heard.
This feels like LW has been away from decent people for so long she doesn't recognize how outrageously horrendous everyone involved has acted.
Here's hoping LW gets the therapy she deserves.
I wonder if this is a more a symptom of generally feeling overlooked/unloved/lonely. Birthdays can highlight the people present or absent in your life, and then have the side by side comparison with someone who seems to have everything you're missing.
Politely decline, and reflect on what kinds of relationships you'd like to have in your life for the next birthday. Then put some time and effort into making that happen.
@kimmiinthemitten Trauma may have been the wrong word, and TBH I struggled a bit with the wording, but I still think the experience is largely subjective. Some people can shrug something like this off immediately (once it was clear BIL was fine), some take more time, but my main point was that I don't think under two weeks is an unreasonable timeframe to still be processing what happened.
eta: I think it's fine to still process what happened with the caveat that it's not being dumped on BIL or sister, or others close to this. Though nothing has been written to suggest that's the case.