nicolegs17 member


Last Active
  • Re: Laser Hair Removal

    banana468 said:
    banana468 said:
    banana468 said:
    I got laser about 8 years ago and it worked for a few months and then all grew back.
    I no longer bother removing my body hair. I have light skin and thick, dark hair that grows on my face, chest, and stomach, as well as on my legs. It is part of my body and I no longer worry about changing my body to conform to a male-defined expectation of female beauty.
    I found it very interesting and infuriating to learn about the history of women's hair removal in North America. It was practically non-existent until shaving companies needed a new market during WW1.

    Not saying you got yours done "for a man". I'm saying that the idea that women should not have facial hair is ahistorical and male-defined.
    It's like when women claim they're shaving their legs "because I like how smooth it feels!" but wouldn't even know what having smooth legs felt like if they hadn't removed it in the first place.

    True, lots of women enforce male-created standards on other women as a way of maintaining their position in the status quo. You see that in a lot of the defensiveness - "I spend hours of time and lots of money doing painful things to modify my body because I like it!" in that. It's so strange. Women who are interested in performing femininity often get upset when anyone criticizes these traditions and their impact on women in even the mildest of terms. Funnily enough, it's only ever been men who have physically attacked me on the street for being an ugly, hairy, man-hating dyke.
    Women just find more creative ways to subtly call me that, I guess.

    We don't have a free choice though when one choice (not removing hair) is so intensely stigmatized and rendered culturally unacceptable. You do not ever see women in media with body hair. Even on post-apocalyptic shows like The Walking Dead where the men all have ratty beards, the women are still completely hairless. Razor commercials for women show a razor moving over an already bare leg - that's how unspeakable not removing your body hair is.
    This is a cultural phenomenon that affects all women and how we make our choices, whether we like it or not.
    When one choice involves harassment and abuse and the other is presented as the only acceptable way to exist, how can that be presented as a choice? When young women are just handed a razor when they hit puberty and expected to remove their body hair, almost before they have any?
    Women are not shown any way to grow up with their bodies in their natural state, and this cultural phenomenon requires critical analysis beyond "but I like it!" Of course most women are convinced they like it. We have never been given a real choice.

    And here's the textbook defensiveness I was talking about.
    Look, I don't have the power to come into your house and take away your razor. Do whatever you like! But women should be allowed to talk about the ways that this practice is coercive and harmful.
    You enjoying shaving is going to be validated for you at every other possible turn. If you can't bear to read one woman's criticisms of hair removal, go outside! Or watch a movie or a tv show. Read a magazine. You'll get lots of validation for your socially-approved choice there.

    And you don't have to talk to me about changing behaviour to protect yourself from bullies. I was a visibly gay child in a rural conservative area in the 90s. You know what would have been helpful? Someone - literally anyone - saying "hey, it's messed up that you're being treated like that and there's nothing wrong with you. You don't have to do be who they want you to be".
    Kuus, is that you?

    On a serious note, shut up.  Seriously.  You came in here with a valid point which could have been a constructive talking point, but unfortunately you met a poster's "defensiveness" over what she perceives to be her choices or preferred conformity to societal norms/pressures (and for some the cause of insecurities) with your own antagonistic brow-beating position that we're all just hairless, brainless sheep trailing after a hair-covered man.  

    Calm your tits (in or out of the bra/shirt/societal fabric restricting device), know your audience, and try again with less tone.
  • Re: Shoeless co-worker grosses me out

    I'd report it.  It is a liability and would have it documented.  You can't just go barefoot in a normal professional/working office.  There are parts of me that  want to go there and put shoes on that damn lady myself.
  • Re: FRIDAY!

    I want a nap.
  • Re: Today's Rage

    We had wholly uninvited people show up from half the country away.  Be prepared for more asshattery.
  • Re: UPDATE: kid question - WWWWD? (sorry, it's long)

    Can you rehome her?  jk  ;)
    I swear, just when we think we have the parenting thing figured out they change the game.