Dear Prudence,
I have an 18-year-old child who is very critical. “Chris” is bipolar (like me) and loves attention. They say they are transgender, but while I am a huge LGBT rights supporter, I don’t see it. They have started criticizing everything I do, saying that I am not being a parent and that they have to parent me. Chris’ stepdad disagrees, and grown-ups who meet Chris think it is an attention grab. Granted, while Chris’ dad and I were getting divorced, I went through a period during which I drank a lot. However, I am now in a stable relationship and rarely drink. Chris is undermining my confidence as a mother, and I am not sure how to deal with the situation. I am in therapy, as is Chris. I feel like Chris is trying to make me think I am a failure as a mom, and it is deeply upsetting.
—I Think My Kid Is Gaslighting Me