Military Brides

grr, valentines day

i wish someone would buy me some ice cream. bleh. i don't even want to think about that day... but i have all these cute couples calling in and inquiring about this v-day workshop we've got going on at the yoga studio i work at.

best part? ive gotta work that night. and watch all of these lovey doveys float off in their own little tantrically rejuvenated bubbles, while i close up and go home alone.

boo, deployment... BOO.
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Re: grr, valentines day

  • AudgiePodgeAudgiePodge
    2500 Comments Second Anniversary 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    member
    edited December 2011
    It will only bother you if you let it.
    I'm not good at feelings.

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  • edited December 2011
    In Response to Re: grr, valentines day:
    It will only bother you if you let it.
    Posted by AudgiePodge

    truth. but still... bleh. haha :).

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  • edited December 2011

    This probably isn't what you want to hear but I haven't spent a Valentines Day with FI in over 5 years. It happens. Every year I make my Mom's famous heart sugar cookies and give them to the single ladies in my life with a handmade valentine. I know its painful to be without your FI/SO but you have one someone special in your life you are just apart. Think about how sad it is for those who don't have someone special .....

    just a thought... SHARE the love :)

  • edited December 2011
    I hear ya. FI just left yesterday for training in Oklahoma and he will be gone for Valentine's Day. I wallowed over some Ben and Jerry's Phish Food yesterday. :)
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  • calindicalindi
    5000 Comments Second Anniversary Combo Breaker
    member
    edited December 2011
    You can choose to celebrate another day instead of Valentines Day.  We've been together 3 years now, and we have never celebrated even one Valentines.  Not a card, not flowers, not dinner.  We simply choose to ignore it entirely.  It's not because we're against romantic gestures and all that, but it's simply because it is a day when it's "mandated" to be romantic, which somehow makes it less romantic.  You get all the women subconsciously competing with each other - it becomes water cooler talk about what you got, and so on and so forth.  I just can't be bothered.  Plus all the restaurants are booked up, flowers are more expensive and crappier since they're in such high demand they pump them out of hot houses.  In general, the hotels are all booked and super expensive - it's just a lousy day to celebrate since everyone else is, too!

    So we celebrate our anniversary (in October) and will designate one other day of the year as "Romantic Day".  You can pick a "Romantic Day" for when he gets back - then you don't have to share with anyone else!  You'll be the only one to get flowers that day, you'll get deals on restaurants and hotels because it won't be as busy.  Seriously, it's so much better!

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  • kara811kara811
    2500 Comments Third Anniversary
    member
    edited December 2011
    I might take the cake on this one actually. Valentine's Day is our anniversary and every year we aren't able to spend it together. But we never let it get to us, we cope. We always send each other presents and celebrate it when we are together. I never cared much for Valentine's Day, I care more for the date because it's our anniversary. But thankfully, our wedding is in less than a month so I get to see the FI very soon! Like others said, don't let it get to you. It's not even an official holiday! 
  • edited December 2011
    My DH hasn't been home for Valentine's Day in 3 years. And this year, altough he's home, he has a 24 hr duty, so won't be "home". It happens. I'll be much more upset when our 1st anniversary comes around and he'll be deployed. V-Day is just a marketing holiday, not something you should be upset about missing (except of course, when it's also your anniversary...)
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  • edited December 2011
    youre all right. i know valentine's day is a hallmark holiday, and we're all so lucky and fortunate to have men who love us just the way we need year round :). it's another day... just gotta treat it as such. and be happy for all the love around me.
     
    and of course, share the love too <3.

    okay okay, i'm cheered up now :). thanks guys :).
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  • Beachy730Beachy730
    5000 Comments Fourth Anniversary Combo Breaker
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    edited December 2011
    I understand the feeling, but you just have to look at it that it's out of our control, so no use getting upset.  H was gone for last Thanksgiving and Christmas, and for  Valentine's this year.  Then he will miss our anniversary, possibly my birthday, and then next Christmas, Valentine's Day, and Easter, and maybe his birthday.  Basically in a year and half we will get his birthday, 1 Easter, and 1 Thanksgiving.  It happens.  We will be married for 2 and a half years before we get to spend a Christmas or Valentine's day together.
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  • Sammy0709Sammy0709
    Fifth Anniversary 500 Comments 25 Love Its
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    edited December 2011

    I haven't been with DH on a Valentine's Day in 4 years, or Christmas, or Thanksgiving, etc.  He has always been in school or on deployment for the last 4 years.  I always worked on Valentine's Day.  Suprisingly, I didn't mind the couples who came in and were all lovey dovey.  It usually reminded me that I have someone that feels that way about me no matter where he is and we don't need a holiday to celebrate it.

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  • edited December 2011
    It's never good to dwell on sad thoughts during deployment... they're just too long to spend the whole time moping! But some days you just need to let yourself feel it, and I'd say it's pretty normal to feel "blah" or to feel depressed or mad or all kinds of things every now and then.

    (Maybe I'll get more used to it in the future - I've only been through one deployment so far. I'm a big fan of the "nothing I can do so no use getting upset" idea, but stilll, missing somebody can't ever get that easy, can it? )
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  • Beachy730Beachy730
    5000 Comments Fourth Anniversary Combo Breaker
    member
    edited December 2011

    You'll always miss them.  But if you spend the whole time thinking about how horrible it is without them there, then it never will get any better.  As the time passes you just get more used to a schedule and a routine.  I'm lucky that I get to email with my H back and forth for a few hours everyday.  It definitely makes it seem like he's much closer than he actually is. 

    Don't get me wrong though, I still have some rough days.  Thanksgiving was much harder on me than I expected, but then Christmas was easier.  You can't control how you feel about it, it's just controlling how you react to your feelings. 

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