less than 2 months

boomboom1243

Just figured Id post.

Getting married June 8th.

Tomorrow is our Jack and Jill. Super excited we are expecting 40 people and its gonna be so much fun and hopefully it will pay off the balance of our honeymoon! which since we already got over 1000 in ticket purchases I have no doubt we will get another grand or so.

Wedding. Everything is done but my homemade DIY aisle runner with petals glued on but I know that will take FOREVER. We sent out of invites end of March and it is so exciting seeing what everyone is eating i already made an excel spreadsheet so its easy to make escort cards and tell the venue the food choices!  I cant wait to be married and I cant believe its less then 2 months away!!!!

this year went by sooooo fasssst.

sparkles776

What exactly are people purchasing tickets for? Also, is a jack and jill a shower? If so, most people tend to bring a physical gift to a shower since it is a gift giving event, so I would not count on getting as much cash as you think you are going to get.

cnf2013

People have to pay to attend your shower..? Whaaaat..? Are you also expecting a tangible gift? The point of a shower is to shower the bride with gifts. But I guess you can ask your guests to throw all their cash in the air and they can watch you dance and roll around in it instead. Make it raaaaaaiiiiin. 

cnf2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2013-weddings_less-than-2-months?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:f30b0bfc-508d-415c-bf59-ab83e327da37Discussion:42a8ec1e-be50-4d9f-97f7-1ba8c1b10a12Post:809a3fec-da2f-46cd-8b51-7b95b3b37781">Re: less than 2 months</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: less than 2 months : I mean, I'm fully expecting this at my shower tomorrow. <strong>On top of a new TOS, TK should roll out a sarcasm font</strong>
Posted by mrskaiser22[/QUOTE]

<div>Yessss!!</div>

ginabina1440

Speaking honestly, we have never heard of that kind of shower. I'm sure you're not going around saying those kinds of things to your family and friends, and I'm not going to sit here and pretend that the amount of money I will be receiving at my wedding hasn't crossed my mind.... but I've never ever ever ever considered charging people to attend my shower? I am not even having anything to do with my shower, and to be honest, if my girls ever DID charge my family and friends to attend, I would be thoroughly offended on their behalf.

Anyway, I am still interested to see how this plays out. Does none of the money go to the BMs to recoup some of their costs?

zmariche

Wowww you girls are really mean!

I think what she means is that they registered for her honeymoon. You register for specific items like a 5 course meal, drinks on the plane, etc. Then the site you register through puts a price on that and that's what people gift you with. So the $1000 she says they've gotten in ticket purchases is probably referring to plane tickets.

sparkles776

Excuse me, zmariche, first of all I do not think she is intending to do a honeymoon registry. I think she is selling tickets to her shower, you do not sell tickets for a honeymoon registry. Second, are you aware of how honeymoon registrys work? Sure, seems great, but you pay those companies and you think you are gifting the bride and groom with meals, drinks, etc, but the company takes a percentage, so you may pay $100 and the couple is cut a check for $80. I would much prefer to write a check where the couple would get to keep the ENTIRE amount. I never in my life will shop off of a honeymoon registry.

And if you think we are so mean for speaking our minds, we are random internet strangers, if random internet stranger are side eyeing the crap out of something, I am sure people on the guest list are too.  

FruitSnack84

My ladies have pretty much already said all there is to say here! Charging your guests an entrance fee to come to a party purposely held to give you presents is just beyond crappy and greedy. You need to fund your own wedding AND honeymoon. It's obvious from this post that you view your friends and family as walking checkbooks, which is a terrible thing.

melissanjoe21

Why go through all the hassel of selling tickets?  They have these nice little gadgets you you can attached to your phone and then you can just have your family and friends swipe the debit/credit cards at the door.

kellyeliz

In Response to Re:less than 2 months:[QUOTE]Why go through all the hassel of selling tickets?nbsp; They have these nice little gadgets you you can attached to your phone and then you can just have your family and friends swipe the debit/credit cards at the door. Posted by melissanjoe21[/QUOTE]

Yesss why didn't I think of this! I should totally assign someone to stand at the door and swipe credit cards! Insert Sarcasm. Seriously? What is this?

blferguson1s

You mean I could have made a bunch of my friends give me $50 each to pay for my honeymoon instead of working, saving, and paying for it myself? Why didn't anyone tell me about this before? Darn it!

Sorry, I just don't think highly of anyone coming online to brag about how much money they are expecting people to give them. I hope you have a backup plan to pay for your honeymoon just in case. Best of luck to you.

Sassenach1743

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2013-weddings_less-than-2-months?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:f30b0bfc-508d-415c-bf59-ab83e327da37Discussion:42a8ec1e-be50-4d9f-97f7-1ba8c1b10a12Post:3cb326c2-ce1a-43a6-ac84-91f128dc58e1">less than 2 months</a>:
[QUOTE]Just figured Id post. Getting married June 8th. <strong>Tomorrow is our Jack and Jill.</strong> Super excited we are expecting 40 people and its gonna be so much fun and <strong>hopefully it will pay off the balance of our honeymoon! which since we already got over 1000 in ticket purchases I have no doubt we will get another grand or so.</strong> Wedding. Everything is done but my homemade DIY aisle runner with petals glued on but I know that will take FOREVER. We sent out of invites end of March and it is so exciting seeing what everyone is eating i already made an excel spreadsheet so its easy to make escort cards and tell the venue the food choices!  I cant wait to be married and I cant believe its less then 2 months away!!!! this year went by sooooo fasssst.
Posted by boomboom1243[/QUOTE]

<div><div>Yeah, I'm lost on a few things here...</div><div>
</div><div>What the heck is a Jack and Jill? Is that another term for a couples shower? Or a co-ed Bachelor party? I've never heard of this "Jack and Jill" before. Please explain.</div><div>
</div><div>Also, I'm thinking PP are correct in assuming (from what you wrote in your post) that the $1,000 in ticket purchases is either some sort of monetary donation for the shower or purchases towards your honeymoon registry.... either way it sounds rude. </div><div>
</div><div>If it truly is a honeymoon registry that you're referring too... You're basically excited that your friends and family are being ripped off. If you want cash to put towards your honeymoon then it's best not to register (or make a small one for those who would rather give a physical gift) and then spread the word that you'd prefer cash or checks. As PP have mentioned, those honeyfund sites take a percentage so it's really a RIP OFF!</div><div>
</div><div>Also, why bother having a shower? If you're just collecting envelopes with checks or tickets for your honeyfund, it doesn't sound like much fun. Showers are to "shower the bride or couple with gifts" and watch them being opened, etc., which doesn't sound like it's going to happen if all you're hoping to do is count the money you're expecting to receive.</div><div>
</div><div>I don't know you, so I don't know your motives but just so you know... you sound greedy and entitled expecting money from your friends and family to pay off the balance of your honeymoon. Even if that's what you'd do with the money you receive, you don't actually say such a thing. Think about it...</div><div>
</div><div>On another note, my wedding is on the 8th too! I'm getting really excited and I agree, this year went by super fast! Congratulations and I hope you have a fantastic day!</div></div>

Sassenach1743

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2013-weddings_less-than-2-months?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:f30b0bfc-508d-415c-bf59-ab83e327da37Discussion:42a8ec1e-be50-4d9f-97f7-1ba8c1b10a12Post:ec8ab896-4052-4bb6-8ab0-a9088583f955">Re: less than 2 months</a>:
[QUOTE]<strong>Wowww you girls are really mean!</strong> I think what she means is that they registered for her honeymoon. You register for specific items like a 5 course meal, drinks on the plane, etc. Then the site you register through puts a price on that and that's what people gift you with. So the $1000 she says they've gotten in ticket purchases is probably referring to plane tickets.
Posted by zmariche[/QUOTE]

<div>Yeah, you obviously haven't been on these boards enough yet. Here on TK you will find blunt and honest opinions. We are not mean. When we see a bad idea we call it out and offer advice and/or suggestions... because we will never support, encourage, or validate a bad or rude idea. Plain and simple. </div><div>
</div><div>
</div>

JennLax

FYI - A jack and jill isn't the same as a shower.  It's also called a stag and doe.  I have seen them done before and FIs mom thought I should do one, but I exnayed that idea IMMEDIATELY.

Basically it's a big party that you throw where people pay to get in.   You set up a ton of games (lots which cost a few dollars to participate) and sometimes sell raffle tickets for auctions of donated items.  Occassionally there is a bar, which is also used as a money maker.  Couples use these to raise money for their weddings.

It is apparently? acceptable in some circles.  I think they are ICKY.

Sassenach1743

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2013-weddings_less-than-2-months?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:f30b0bfc-508d-415c-bf59-ab83e327da37Discussion:42a8ec1e-be50-4d9f-97f7-1ba8c1b10a12Post:8e144800-1cf9-4194-a606-628ff48d7d81">Re: less than 2 months</a>:
[QUOTE]FYI - A jack and jill isn't the same as a shower.  It's also called a stag and doe.  I have seen them done before and FIs mom thought I should do one, but I exnayed that idea IMMEDIATELY. Basically it's a big party that you throw where people pay to get in.   You set up a ton of games (lots which cost a few dollars to participate) and sometimes sell raffle tickets for auctions of donated items.  Occassionally there is a bar, which is also used as a money maker.  Couples use these to raise money for their weddings. It is apparently? acceptable in some circles.  I think they are ICKY.
Posted by JennLax[/QUOTE]

<div>Whoa! Seriously? I have never heard of this before, ever! This is beyond rude!!! I cannot believe anyone would do this, or that anyone else would participate and think it's acceptable. Sooooo tacky!</div><div>
</div>

boomboom1243

We had a great time at our jack an Jill and everyone enjoyed the food and prizes ( we had a 46 inch tv and tablet amoung many more)and games. I know not many people are fond of the stag doe parties and that's fine. It was an awesome party that everyone was able to go to. And the money that was made was just a nice bonus to a great night. We did not want people to bring gifts so there was no gift table and I told everyone to make that clear although a couple people gave some and still insisted I take it. We ran the bar and purchased alcohol to sell and in the end our main goal was to have a party for everyone to enjoy and we overspent to do so. My friends and family are not walking dollar signs because I love them. But thanks for the Comments. Eeeek June 8th here we go!!!!!!

cnf2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2013-weddings_less-than-2-months?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:f30b0bfc-508d-415c-bf59-ab83e327da37Discussion:42a8ec1e-be50-4d9f-97f7-1ba8c1b10a12Post:8e144800-1cf9-4194-a606-628ff48d7d81">Re: less than 2 months</a>:
[QUOTE]FYI - A jack and jill isn't the same as a shower.  It's also called a stag and doe.  I have seen them done before and FIs mom thought I should do one, but I exnayed that idea IMMEDIATELY. Basically it's a big party that you throw where people pay to get in.   You set up a ton of games (lots which cost a few dollars to participate) and sometimes sell raffle tickets for auctions of donated items.  Occassionally there is a bar, which is also used as a money maker.  Couples use these to raise money for their weddings. It is apparently? acceptable in some circles.  I think they are ICKY.
Posted by JennLax[/QUOTE]

<div>I always though a Jack and Jill party was just a co-ed shower. Eeewwww, what a horrible way to treat your friends and family.</div><div>
</div><div>Of course you very clearly stated no gifts. Wouldn't want some material garbage to take the place of money given to via bank of family. Gah, pay for the wedding and honeymoon you can afford and stop fund raising through your families pockets. How horribly selfish, greedy, and disgusting of you. </div>

blueikaos

Sassenach1743

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2013-weddings_less-than-2-months?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:f30b0bfc-508d-415c-bf59-ab83e327da37Discussion:42a8ec1e-be50-4d9f-97f7-1ba8c1b10a12Post:c7a5e467-506a-4647-9adf-ca3cf22393ea">Re: less than 2 months</a>:
[QUOTE]We had a great time at our jack an Jill and everyone enjoyed the food and prizes ( we had a 46 inch tv and tablet amoung many more)and games. I know not many people are fond of the stag doe parties and that's fine. It was an awesome party that everyone was able to go to. And the money that was made was just a nice bonus to a great night. We did not want people to bring gifts so there was no gift table and I told everyone to make that clear although a couple people gave some and still insisted I take it. <strong><u>We ran the bar and purchased alcohol to sell</u></strong> and in the end our main goal was to have a party for everyone to enjoy and we overspent to do so. My friends and family are not walking dollar signs because I love them. But thanks for the Comments. Eeeek June 8th here we go!!!!!!
Posted by boomboom1243[/QUOTE]

<div>Are you even allowed to do this without a license? </div><div>
</div><div>I'm not sure of Connecticut's laws or regulations on alcohol but I'm pretty sure purchasing alcohol for resale is not okay in this situation. To run a bar and serve drinks that you are charging people for (even in your own home) is something you'd need to have a liquor license for, no? </div><div>
</div><div>Anyway, guess this is just another thing that makes other parts of the country so different. Glad you had a good time though...</div>

boomboom1243

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2013-weddings_less-than-2-months?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:f30b0bfc-508d-415c-bf59-ab83e327da37Discussion:42a8ec1e-be50-4d9f-97f7-1ba8c1b10a12Post:3e3e703c-5c63-42b9-9e9b-5ba9d812da8b">Re: less than 2 months</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: less than 2 months : Are you even allowed to do this without a license?  I'm not sure of Connecticut's laws or regulations on alcohol but I'm pretty sure purchasing alcohol for resale is not okay in this situation. To run a bar and serve drinks that you are charging people for (even in your own home) is something you'd need to have a liquor license for, no?  Anyway, guess this is just another thing that makes other parts of the country so different. Glad you had a good time though...
Posted by brita722[/QUOTE]

in CT you just need to get a temp lisence in the town you are selling in which we had. but yes unless you have that it is illegal.

sabrinaaleigh

This is my first time on this board and I have to say that I am completely turned off by such negativity. What is this, high school?  To the original poster, I applaud you for not responding to the rude and judgmental comments hurled at you (funny, because that is the true measure of class). If you don't like her idea--don't respond to it! She didn't ask for your advice or approval. Do all of us who have come here to share our excitement and joy a favor and shut up. 

Have a fabulous wedding and honeymoon, original poster! You are lucky to have family and friends who are willing to rally around you to make your dreams come true. 

emilyb213

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2013-weddings_less-than-2-months?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:f30b0bfc-508d-415c-bf59-ab83e327da37Discussion:42a8ec1e-be50-4d9f-97f7-1ba8c1b10a12Post:7336a62e-df13-4ab8-a54d-7256d6be2b88">Re: less than 2 months</a>:
[QUOTE]This is my first time on this board and I have to say that I am completely turned off by such negativity. What is this, high school?  To the original poster, I applaud you for not responding to the rude and judgmental comments hurled at you (funny, because that is the true measure of class). If you don't like her idea--don't respond to it! <strong>She didn't ask for your advice or approval. Do all of us who have come here to share our excitement and joy a favor and shut up.</strong>  Have a fabulous wedding and honeymoon, original poster! You are lucky to have family and friends who are willing to rally around you to make your dreams come true. <div>Posted by sabrinaaleigh[/QUOTE]</div><div>
<a href="http://heartykawaii.tumblr.com/post/32254876577" rel="nofollow"></a><img class="image" src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mawdliVdK21rstfoqo1_r1_500.gif" alt="" width="500" height="227" />
<div>
</div><div>See, here is the crazy thing about posting something on the internet...you don't get to dictate how people respond!! And hitting up your friends and family for money to fund your wedding is the opposite of classy.</div></div>

ginabina1440

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2013-weddings_less-than-2-months?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:f30b0bfc-508d-415c-bf59-ab83e327da37Discussion:42a8ec1e-be50-4d9f-97f7-1ba8c1b10a12Post:7336a62e-df13-4ab8-a54d-7256d6be2b88">Re: less than 2 months</a>:
[QUOTE]This is my first time on this board and I have to say that I am completely turned off by such negativity. What is this, high school?  To the original poster, I applaud you for not responding to the rude and judgmental comments hurled at you (funny, because that is the true measure of class). If you don't like her idea--don't respond to it! She didn't ask for your advice or approval. Do all of us who have come here to share our excitement and joy a favor and shut up.  Have a fabulous wedding and honeymoon, original poster! You are lucky to have family and friends who are willing to rally around you to make your dreams come true. 
Posted by sabrinaaleigh[/QUOTE]

<a href="http://www.reactiongifs.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/carazy.gif" rel="nofollow"><img class="alignnone size-full wp-image-8783" src="http://www.reactiongifs.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/carazy.gif" alt="crazy" width="150" height="134" /></a>

sabrinaaleigh

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2013-weddings_less-than-2-months?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:f30b0bfc-508d-415c-bf59-ab83e327da37Discussion:42a8ec1e-be50-4d9f-97f7-1ba8c1b10a12Post:35dfc567-65e7-4fd8-97f6-e80fe6af2a78">Re: less than 2 months</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: less than 2 months :
Posted by ginabina1440[/QUOTE]

<div> You "ladies" are hilarious and sophomoric. LOL!</div>

sabrinaaleigh

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2013-weddings_less-than-2-months?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:f30b0bfc-508d-415c-bf59-ab83e327da37Discussion:42a8ec1e-be50-4d9f-97f7-1ba8c1b10a12Post:a376a9a8-10b1-466f-8fd4-3d48603555fb">Re: less than 2 months</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: less than 2 months : See, here is the crazy thing about posting something on the internet...you don't get to dictate how people respond!! And hitting up your friends and family for money to fund your wedding is the opposite of classy.
Posted by emilyb213[/QUOTE]

<div>^^</div><div>  yawning...</div>

ginabina1440

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2013-weddings_less-than-2-months?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:f30b0bfc-508d-415c-bf59-ab83e327da37Discussion:42a8ec1e-be50-4d9f-97f7-1ba8c1b10a12Post:4fe5437c-d0a4-47e8-b519-57df3c7b30ce">Re: less than 2 months</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: less than 2 months :  You "ladies" are hilarious and sophomoric. LOL!
Posted by sabrinaaleigh[/QUOTE]

says the girl who thinks its a great idea to charge people to come to your shower, and OH YEAH, don't forget to bring a CHECK WITH YOU!!

lovefuzzies

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2013-weddings_less-than-2-months?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:f30b0bfc-508d-415c-bf59-ab83e327da37Discussion:42a8ec1e-be50-4d9f-97f7-1ba8c1b10a12Post:7336a62e-df13-4ab8-a54d-7256d6be2b88">Re: less than 2 months</a>:
[QUOTE]This is my first time on this board and I have to say that I am completely turned off by such negativity. What is this, high school?  To the original poster, I applaud you for not responding to the rude and judgmental comments hurled at you (funny, because that is the true measure of class). If you don't like her idea--don't respond to it! She didn't ask for your advice or approval. Do all of us who have come here to share our excitement and joy a favor and shut up.  Have a fabulous wedding and honeymoon, original poster! You are lucky to have family and friends who are willing to rally around you to make your dreams come true. 
Posted by sabrinaaleigh[/QUOTE]

What you call negativity TK calls a reality check.  It's unfortunate that we live in such a PC society because that means those you are closest to won't typically tell you the harsh truth about things like this.  They have a vested interest in not upsetting you.  A group of internet strangers, however, have no interest other than enlightening those of us who had no training in etiquette while growing up.  Yes, I said those of US, I'm including myself because many of my family and friends have suggested that I have things like a cash bar and potluck reception at my wedding.  It wasn't until I came to TK that I realized that doing things like that were not okay because you are not properly hosting the people you invited to the wedding.  If it hadn't been for the brutal honesty of some of the TK "meanies" and their "negativity" I would have committed some serious faux pas.  I certainly don't want my family and friends thinking I'm rude.

Did the OP ask for advice?  No, you are correct, she didn't.  However, she did post on a public forum about a controversial practice and if you would have lurked on some of the other boards you would have understood this.  You also probably would have discovered that the general consensus around these boards is that you cannot tell others how to post.  EVERYONE has freedom of speech, not just those of you who wish to encourage etiquette faux pas.  Lurk a little sabrinaaleigh, you might discover many of those people you think are mean now might actually be *GASP* nice! 

And to the OP, while many of us do not agree with your party idea, I do applaud you for accepting the comments that were made with such a good attitude.  Many of the people who post things that are widely considered to be faux pas stomp their feet and throw a hissy fit upon being told their ideas are bad.  You, however, simply accepted what was said to you as being of a different opinion and moved on.  Kudos to you.

blueikaos

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2013-weddings_less-than-2-months?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:f30b0bfc-508d-415c-bf59-ab83e327da37Discussion:42a8ec1e-be50-4d9f-97f7-1ba8c1b10a12Post:7336a62e-df13-4ab8-a54d-7256d6be2b88">Re: less than 2 months</a>:
[QUOTE]This is my first time on this board and I have to say that I am completely turned off by such negativity. What is this, high school?  To the original poster, I applaud you for not responding to the rude and judgmental comments hurled at you (funny, because that is the true measure of class). If you don't like her idea-<strong>-don't respond to it</strong>! She didn't ask for your advice or approval.<strong> Do all of us who have come here to share our excitement and joy a favor and shut up. </strong> Have a fabulous wedding and honeymoon, original poster! You are lucky to have family and friends who are willing to rally around you to make your dreams come true. 
Posted by sabrinaaleigh[/QUOTE]

Back the truck up.  Did you just tell us to shut up?

it's the internet- we are clearly stating that what we thing OP is wrong... And this board is not negative- These are some of the most awesome ladies I know, extremely supportive and fun!

I can't take messages like this...I just:
<img class="decoded" src="http://www.reactiongifs.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/cant.gif" alt="http://www.reactiongifs.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/cant.gif" />

cnf2013

blueikaos

Cnf- where is the 'like button"?

ginabina1440

LMFAO! you two!! HAHAHA