So when are you having kids?

FiancB

Yeah, the dreaded question :P But we're among friends, right?

Just curious. I'm getting married in June and have the baby rabies pretty bad. I'm just (re)starting school so when we thought it would only take a couple years we figured we'd try after I graduated and worked a year or two. Now that it looks like school will be part time and take four years (I'll be 30 when I graduate), I almost wonder if it wouldn't be easier just to have one sooner. But maybe that's the baby rabies talking. I guess I'll let my BC implant run out (2 years) and we'll revisit it then. 

You? 

KeptInStitches

I'm in grad school going for a Ph.D. My child is my dissertation. And my cat, I guess. And maybe BF's cat.

Eventually I'd like to have 2 kids but no more than 3.

Grabows14

I want to wait a few years to enjoy married life. The really do want 2 or 3 kids though.

bethsmiles

We want to wait a few years and just enjoy being married. We'd also like to finish up school as well (we are both going for PhDs). So I'd say kids are about 5 or 6 years in the future.

WinstonsGirl

Never.  We don't want kids at this point, and maybe we'll change our minds in 5 years, but at this point, I don't think so.  I prefer to spoil my niece and nephew rotten, sugar them up and send them on home.  

nsweare

We already have a 21 month old. We plan to start TTC for baby #2 after we get married in May. I'll be 33 then and at least 34 by the time any future babies are born. I had a difficult pregnancy the first time around and I'll be high risk the second time. We figure if we plan to have another we should probably do it asap to minimize potential risks.

doeydo

I agree with WinstonsGirl.  Neither myself or my FI want to have children.  I am, though, looking forward to being an aunt when my sister has kids.

RebeccaB88

I'm not able to, which is perfectly fine with me. I'm hoping for stepkids.

CLoGreenEyes

Haha, baby rabies - I have never heard that term before.

We both want kids but definitely not right now. He is taking care of his grandfather right now, and I am in nursing school full-time. Once we are married, we hope to wait a few years to settle in, get stable, and knock a few things off the pre-kid bucket list. Maybe another 4-5 years for us. He wants two, I want three, so we plan on at least two and seeing where we stand as far as what we have to devote to a third child (time, money, energy, etc.).

@FiancB, what will you be going to school for?

FiancB

Nursing as well! I do have a previous BS so my gen eds and a lot of sciences are done. I was hoping to load up and get out early but it seems the nursing powers that be get persnickety about that. I know nursing school is hard, but eh, so is work/life/etc. 

WinstonsGirl said:

Never.  We don't want kids at this point, and maybe we'll change our minds in 5 years, but at this point, I don't think so.  I prefer to spoil my niece and nephew rotten, sugar them up and send them on home.  

My sister likes it when I give them loud toys 3:)

WonderRed

We won't be having kids together. Maybe if we found each other again three years sooner, but not now at my age.  I have DS from my first marriage and FI is beyond thrilled to get to be a step dad to him. We wouldn't want to start over again with diapers and sleepless nights, even if we could do it.

KytchynWitche

Not on our to-do list. Like, at all.
We have names picked out for just in case such a thing should happen, but really, our furbabies are enough for us.
My partner's grandmother (who I have yet to meet) keeps asking the family when we're going to get married, 'cause she wants great-grandchildren before she goes. I don't quite see how getting married = babies, but I guess she's old school like that...
We would love to have children together, but with both our medical histories... Well, it's hard enough just to take care of the two of us and the cats.

LizM61409

FI and I will both be 30 next year when we get married and we want 2-3 kids. We'll prolly wait a year then start trying

CLoGreenEyes

@FiancB, awesome That is very helpful that you had most of your pre-reqs out of the way, that is always a blessing. Nursing school is crazy! It's the only 8 credits I've ever taken that feel like 16.

SapphireCounselor

My Dh and I definitely want to have children in another year or so, but for us the path to parenthood will be a little different. I can't have children, so we'll have to adopt. I am actually starting to casually read about the process now, and can say I am a bit scared about it - but we'll get through it.

teacherjodee

Oops!

chibiyui

We're planning to start trying in 2015, once my student loan dent is paid down.

Swazzle

We're unsure if we want children. We're both 28 and I just got Skyla so I don't feel like there's any rush to decide right now. 

Maggie0829

My H always wanted to have kids (me not so much) until we got our pup Gracie.  He was amazed at how much time and energy she took up and she is only a dog.  He always envisioned him having kids as they would pop out at age 3 or 4 when they would be fun to play with and would be able to talk and interact with you, etc.  I don't think he really ever thought about the work it takes to raise a child and the things that you would have to give up, like staying out with his friends until 3am or just dropping everything and going on a vacation, etc.

So at this point, we aren't having kids.  Who knows, that may change in a few years.  I just turned 29 and he will be 30 soon so it isn't like time is running out.  I just know that we are both too selfish to even think about having a kid.  And when I try to explain that to his family they look at me like I have 3 heads and am talking so crazy alien language.

FutureMrsN3312

FI will be 30 in November and I'll be 30 in March.  We're getting married in May so we'll probably start TTC shortly after.  In a perfect world, we would get to enjoy married life for a little bit but waiting a few years makes me nervous.  (Took my parents 6 years to have me.) And multiples run rampant on both sides of our family.  I can't picture being in my mid to late 30's chasing twins or triplets around lol

I'd be ok with just having 1 child but that depends on if FSIL has any.  (There's a big age difference between her and her husband.)  I wouldn't want our child to have no siblings or even cousins.

ElcaB

I love the term baby rabies. Permission to adopt?

I am one of those people whose ovaries go into overdrive every time I see babies. I love children & have worked with them all my life, from babysitting to being a camp counselor to FT nannying. I feel like being a mom is one of my life's callings. The day my first niece was born was one of the happiest days of my life! 

I want two kids, FI wants one. I hope to be done having kids by 30 (I know that sounds silly, and no, I don't think 30 is too old to have children, it's just a weird preference). We all know "life is what happens while you're busy making other plans," so we'll just have to wait and see. Our wedding is next year, and I don't think we'll have kids right away - we'll probably want to just enjoy each other for a year or two. 

I know this is getting super long, but the tough thing is figuring out the whole working & having babies thing. I would hate to have a baby and leave him or her in the care of strangers all day, but not working is not an option. For those of you who have/are planning to have kids, how did you care for them? 

manjermj

Definitely want 2-3 kids in the future. Only married 7 months so far and we're both in Grad School and have big trips planned over the next couple of years. We'll both be 28 this year, so no big rush. Maybe in 2-3 years.

southernbelle0915

I waffle.

Some days we talk about wanting to fill all 4 extra bedrooms with little ones, raise them, watch them grow up and have their own kids and have a huge extended family. Have big Christmases, family reunions and Sunday dinners....

Other days, we hear a child screaming in a restaurant and smile at each other because we don't have to deal with it!! We look at the "vacation fund" that will turn into a "college fund" and on't want to let it go. We sleep through the night and wake up so thankful that all we have to do is make a coffee and go to work. 

Basically it means that we're not ready. Maybe some day. I'm 27 and H is 28 so we have plenty of time.

kefryar

When I slip up on my birth control. I doubt we'll ever plan for a pregnancy.

arrippa

Since I am in my late 30's when I get married, I doubt we will have kids. if we do, it'll probably be through adoption.

amaryann210

I'm 36, FI is 38, so we'll start TTC the night of the wedding.  I have no idea how fertile I am,  and he and I have discussed adoption as a possibility if we have difficulty.  We really want to have kids, but if we don't, we are enough for each other.  I have 5 neices and nephews so far and I love spoiling them.

MayDay513

We will talk about it May 2015. We talked about it and are not ready, we still joke about kids and half seriously consider them. But we plan on waiting until 2015 and re-evaluating at that point. Been married 3.5 months so no rush here.

itzMS

DH wanted to be a "young" dad (he's 28, I'm 29) so we opted to TTC about 6 months into marriage. We're Catholic, so the NFP really helped with making TTC easy as pie.

Baby #1 (boy) will be here in 3 months.

I'm an only child and I know it's not very fun being an "only" as an adult (being the sole person responsible for my parents' care as they age, no siblings to have weekend BBQs with, no cousins on my side for my kids, etc, etc) so we'll probably have 1-3 more fairly close in age.

 

smalfrie19

We are both still really one the fence. Our reasoning is the same as SouthernBelle's ...We are just...ehh.

audubonbride2013

We definitely want kids and more than 1, but we'll decide how many depending on how we feel.  We just got married and are 25.  H has is on his last year of law school, so we'll probably wait 2-3 years to payoff our car loan and pay down his student loans first.

LakeR2014

LizM61409  We're the same way.  Some think we should start right out 'trying' but we think enjoying married life together for at least a year before trying is better for us and any future children.

That being said, I have a lot of friends who have honeymoon babies.   Just not my thing.