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Reception Ideas

Bouquet/Garter Toss

My FI and I caught the bouquet and garter at a wedding and it's a tradition we want to do, however, while him and I are both okay getting in front of a crowd and called out for being single, we don't think many people enjoy this. In order to avoid embarrassing my friends like that, I came up with this idea:

All ladies (single or married) are welcome to participate in the boquet toss and all of the guys (single or taken) in the garter toss. Instead of that awkward "the number of inches above the knee is the number of years the coupled will have great sex" thing, they win a prize. Maybe a bottle of our favorite wine for each of them? (Prize suggestions welcome!)

Does this sound like a good plan? Do you have any other suggestions on what we could do?  

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Re: Bouquet/Garter Toss

  • MrsRadke said:

    My FI and I caught the bouquet and garter at a wedding and it's a tradition we want to do, however, while him and I are both okay getting in front of a crowd and called out for being single, we don't think many people enjoy this. In order to avoid embarrassing my friends like that, I came up with this idea:

    All ladies (single or married) are welcome to participate in the boquet toss and all of the guys (single or taken) in the garter toss. Instead of that awkward "the number of inches above the knee is the number of years the coupled will have great sex" thing, they win a prize. Maybe a bottle of our favorite wine for each of them? (Prize suggestions welcome!)

    Does this sound like a good plan? Do you have any other suggestions on what we could do?  

    I am confused by the bolded.

    FWIW, I dont like bouquet/ garter tosses in general. I actually the whole process or removing the garter is really awkward.

     

    image

    doeydoPrettyGirlLost
  • After the girl get the bouque and the guy gets the garter he usually puts it on her leg and there is always some gimmick to convince the guy to be inappropriate and put it up to the girls crotch.

    Usually its something like "for every inch the guy puts the garter above the girls knee is a year of good sex for the couple." (or a year of good luck, or a child for the couple etc.)

    Sorry, I didn't write it clearly before. I am avoiding the part where the guy puts the garter on someone else.

  • @Maggie0829 I completely agree. Any suggestions on what we can/should do instead?

     I also hate the idea of calling out my single friends/family members since some of them will be mortified.

  • KatWAG said:
    MrsRadke said:

    My FI and I caught the bouquet and garter at a wedding and it's a tradition we want to do, however, while him and I are both okay getting in front of a crowd and called out for being single, we don't think many people enjoy this. In order to avoid embarrassing my friends like that, I came up with this idea:

    All ladies (single or married) are welcome to participate in the boquet toss and all of the guys (single or taken) in the garter toss. Instead of that awkward "the number of inches above the knee is the number of years the coupled will have great sex" thing, they win a prize. Maybe a bottle of our favorite wine for each of them? (Prize suggestions welcome!)

    Does this sound like a good plan? Do you have any other suggestions on what we could do?  

    I am confused by the bolded.

    FWIW, I dont like bouquet/ garter tosses in general. I actually the whole process or removing the garter is really awkward.

    It is said that the number of inches that the guy who caught the garter places the garter passed the girl who caught the bouquets knee is the number of years that the bride and groom will have great sex.

    It is a horrible and mortifying tradition and should never be done, IMO.
    Some how, I have never heard of this part of the tradition, and I'm officially 'horrified!' :S 
    doeydo
  • @JMalettas - in another discussion a while ago on a different board I learned that that tradition is actually very popular in the north east while many elsewhere have never heard of it.  Not sure why it became popular but as a north eastern I am appalled that it started in my part of the country.
    PrettyGirlLost
  • MrsRadke said:

    @Maggie0829 I completely agree. Any suggestions on what we can/should do instead?

     I also hate the idea of calling out my single friends/family members since some of them will be mortified.

    A bottle of wine for the woman who catches it and a bottle of liquor for the guy.

    Or just give them nothing.  In other parts of the country the people who catch the bouquet or garter don't get anything and they don't do the whole "put garter on random strangers leg".  It is just a "fun" activity to have during the wedding.
    PrettyGirlLost
  • I'm planning on giving wine or liquor for ours. I think what you have planned is fine. Some brides on here mentioned lottery tickets as well.
    image



    Anniversary
    PrettyGirlLost
  • MrsRadke said:

    After the girl get the bouque and the guy gets the garter he usually puts it on her leg and there is always some gimmick to convince the guy to be inappropriate and put it up to the girls crotch.

    Usually its something like "for every inch the guy puts the garter above the girls knee is a year of good sex for the couple." (or a year of good luck, or a child for the couple etc.)

    Sorry, I didn't write it clearly before. I am avoiding the part where the guy puts the garter on someone else.

    Ugh!!!! Is this seriously a thing? I prefer your idea of the bottle of wine if you do the tosses at all.
    doeydoPrettyGirlLost
  •  I'm still horrified....
    southernbelle0915
  • What about the lucky single girl & guy do a shot together in honor of the bride & groom. You could have a bartender on stand by to pour their shot of choice for them to make it more enjoyable but also give them the option if they are a non-drink to just have water put into the shot glass. No one else would know it's water while they do the shot.

     

  • Erikan73 said:

    What about the lucky single girl & guy do a shot together in honor of the bride & groom. You could have a bartender on stand by to pour their shot of choice for them to make it more enjoyable but also give them the option if they are a non-drink to just have water put into the shot glass. No one else would know it's water while they do the shot.

     

    I would not force the girl and the guy who catch them to be together-especially if they have partners or dates of their own. 
    southernbelle0915PrettyGirlLoststewieman86
  • I was just at a wedding on Saturday where a 10 year old kid caught the garter and they tried to get him to put it on the girl's leg. It was so appalling, the kid literally bolted out of the building and had to be be hunted down to find him. 

    If you are going to do the tosses, just skip the gross part, I don't think you need to give the catchers anything. 
    image
  • KatWAG said:
    MrsRadke said:

    My FI and I caught the bouquet and garter at a wedding and it's a tradition we want to do, however, while him and I are both okay getting in front of a crowd and called out for being single, we don't think many people enjoy this. In order to avoid embarrassing my friends like that, I came up with this idea:

    All ladies (single or married) are welcome to participate in the boquet toss and all of the guys (single or taken) in the garter toss. Instead of that awkward "the number of inches above the knee is the number of years the coupled will have great sex" thing, they win a prize. Maybe a bottle of our favorite wine for each of them? (Prize suggestions welcome!)

    Does this sound like a good plan? Do you have any other suggestions on what we could do?  

    I am confused by the bolded.

    FWIW, I dont like bouquet/ garter tosses in general. I actually the whole process or removing the garter is really awkward.

    It is said that the number of inches that the guy who caught the garter places the garter passed the girl who caught the bouquets knee is the number of years that the bride and groom will have great sex.

    It is a horrible and mortifying tradition and should never be done, IMO.
    OMG I have never heard of this, and I would be absolutely embarrassed!!!

  • Nope. This is why we, ultimately decided (as of last week) to skip the bouquet toss all together. (we had already planned to skip the garter) - no one likes to be called out on that stuff. 

    Instead, we're going to do the anniversary dance, and the couple married longest will get the toss bouquet as their "prize" (it's something I made - ribbon & fabric flowers). 
    aimeerobichaux
  • Yeah, I'm always horrified by any sort of put the garter on things. I've never witnessed it and the idea just irks me. A lot. I won't go into a laundry list of the reasons why I hate it.

    For an alternative, you could attach gift cards to national chains (assuming you have a crowd from all over).  I'm not into the tosses, but for a chance at $50 worth of clothes/movie tickets/whatever, I'd probably get out of my seat.
    Don't worry guys, I have the Wedding Police AND the Whambulance on speed dial!
    PrettyGirlLost
  • How about just not doing them at all? 
    southernbelle0915SKPMPrettyGirlLost
  • @JMalettas - in another discussion a while ago on a different board I learned that that tradition is actually very popular in the north east while many elsewhere have never heard of it.  Not sure why it became popular but as a north eastern I am appalled that it started in my part of the country.
    I'm from the Northeast, and have caught a few bouquets myself, but instead of the guy who catches the garter putting it on the leg of the girl who caught the bouquet, they dance the next slow dance together along with the bride and groom. then about half way through, the rest of the guests join in...
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • casey8784 said:
    @JMalettas - in another discussion a while ago on a different board I learned that that tradition is actually very popular in the north east while many elsewhere have never heard of it.  Not sure why it became popular but as a north eastern I am appalled that it started in my part of the country.
    I'm from the Northeast, and have caught a few bouquets myself, but instead of the guy who catches the garter putting it on the leg of the girl who caught the bouquet, they dance the next slow dance together along with the bride and groom. then about half way through, the rest of the guests join in...
    Just out of curiosity, what happens if the two catchers don't want to dance together?
  • casey8784 said:
    @JMalettas - in another discussion a while ago on a different board I learned that that tradition is actually very popular in the north east while many elsewhere have never heard of it.  Not sure why it became popular but as a north eastern I am appalled that it started in my part of the country.
    I'm from the Northeast, and have caught a few bouquets myself, but instead of the guy who catches the garter putting it on the leg of the girl who caught the bouquet, they dance the next slow dance together along with the bride and groom. then about half way through, the rest of the guests join in...
    I think this is just as bad as having the guy put the garter on the girl.

    I just don't get why people think it is a good idea to force two people that may or may not know each other or like each other together just because they caught something.
    PrettyGirlLost
  • casey8784 said:
    @JMalettas - in another discussion a while ago on a different board I learned that that tradition is actually very popular in the north east while many elsewhere have never heard of it.  Not sure why it became popular but as a north eastern I am appalled that it started in my part of the country.
    I'm from the Northeast, and have caught a few bouquets myself, but instead of the guy who catches the garter putting it on the leg of the girl who caught the bouquet, they dance the next slow dance together along with the bride and groom. then about half way through, the rest of the guests join in...
    I think this is just as bad as having the guy put the garter on the girl.

    I just don't get why people think it is a good idea to force two people that may or may not know each other or like each other together just because they caught something.
    I was at wedding where a couple were the catchers and they ended up getting married (and divorced) so they were fine with him putting the garter on her.  I've also been to a wedding where the catchers were a tween boy and a grown woman.  They were asked to dance together.  They just held hands, no other contact and they looked uncomfortable.  I've also seen a tween girl and a grown man be the catchers and just have their picture taken together and the girl still looked a little awkward.  Basically, you just never know how someone is going to react to being put in the spotlight, especially if that someone is a child or teenager who thought they were doing something fun and didn't know they were going then become everyone's focus.  
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  • I'm 42 and getting married for the first time. So I can tell you that the tradition of the bouquet toss was always a time when I would run from the reception hall in order to avoid the inevitable "go oooooonnnnn, all single ladies have to join in.....". I have heard this from other women as well. However if you do choose to do the bouquet toss/garter removal, I would follow the advise of some of the other posters in giving the two catchers a prize or similar.
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    PrettyGirlLost
  • edited November 2013
    I'm having the garter and bouquet catchers compete for a prize. We're going to do a minute-to-win-it game (this one, specifically: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jWanTQhxZlM). Victor gets a prize of some kind (liquor, gift card, etc.). All men can compete for the garter, all women can compete for the bouquet. It'll be fun. :) 
  • I'm having the garter and bouquet catchers compete for a prize. We're going to do a minute-to-win-it game (this one, specifically: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jWanTQhxZlM). Victor gets a prize of some kind (liquor, gift card, etc.). All men can compete for the garter, all women can compete for the bouquet. It'll be fun. :) 
    I'm just curious: What will you do if no one competes?
  • I'm having the garter and bouquet catchers compete for a prize. We're going to do a minute-to-win-it game (this one, specifically: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jWanTQhxZlM). Victor gets a prize of some kind (liquor, gift card, etc.). All men can compete for the garter, all women can compete for the bouquet. It'll be fun. :) 
    So you throw the bouquet and a woman catches it and then you throw the garter and a man catches it and then you make the two of them do that for a prize?  Why can't you just have two prizes?  There is no way I would participate in something like that.  
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  • I am also mortified at the above "tradition" of the garter inches = great sex for the B&G. I think as the bride, I'd be mortified about having that announced in front of my grandparents and FI's family!

    I'm cool with the garter and bouquet tosses, but I don't like any sort of tradition where the two respective winners must do something together. 

    I do like the idea of a prize, and that the tosses are available to anyone. Considering this as we have few single guests, so it would be fun to open it up to more people. We are going to do the tosses because at least for the bouquet, I know some women who would like to do it if only for it's competitive aspect and it's "always done". 
    PrettyGirlLost
  • Jen4948 - I am honestly not going to have to worry about that. I chose to do it this way based on the goofiness of my family and attendants. We do these kinds of things at every large family gathering (for example, at Xmas, we wrap the living room with christmas paper so the kids can burst through the wall to get to the presents, we do silly dance contests at halloween, etc.).  

    mysticl - well, good thing my guests won't feel the same way as you. Probably has something to do with it being a reception of 130 people who I all know will love this. Maybe because everyone who isn't family is a theatre or music performance major. :) 

    If this is something that you may be considering to do, you could announce that the "catchers" will compete. If someone doesn't want to participate, then they don't have to try to catch the symbolic objects. Simple as that. 


  • Jen4948 - I am honestly not going to have to worry about that. I chose to do it this way based on the goofiness of my family and attendants. We do these kinds of things at every large family gathering (for example, at Xmas, we wrap the living room with christmas paper so the kids can burst through the wall to get to the presents, we do silly dance contests at halloween, etc.).  

    mysticl - well, good thing my guests won't feel the same way as you. Probably has something to do with it being a reception of 130 people who I all know will love this. Maybe because everyone who isn't family is a theatre or music performance major. :) 

    If this is something that you may be considering to do, you could announce that the "catchers" will compete. If someone doesn't want to participate, then they don't have to try to catch the symbolic objects. Simple as that. 


    That sounds incredibly cute and fun.  Christmas and Halloween aren't weddings though and people have different expectations of them and behave differently.   Is that only your family that does it? Or does your FI family do stuff like that too?  I love to perform, I would not love to do that.  If it works for your crowd awesome, just don't assume that because someone has specific major they will automatically be up for something.
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  • Jen4948 said:
    casey8784 said:
    @JMalettas - in another discussion a while ago on a different board I learned that that tradition is actually very popular in the north east while many elsewhere have never heard of it.  Not sure why it became popular but as a north eastern I am appalled that it started in my part of the country.
    I'm from the Northeast, and have caught a few bouquets myself, but instead of the guy who catches the garter putting it on the leg of the girl who caught the bouquet, they dance the next slow dance together along with the bride and groom. then about half way through, the rest of the guests join in...
    Just out of curiosity, what happens if the two catchers don't want to dance together?
    Not sure if I've ever seen that happen. For the most part, at least from what I remember, the catchers were friends, or at least knew each other (friends of the bride and/or groom). Most of the time the people who would assemble to try to catch the items were mainly the younger crowd, mainly friends. 

    The few times that a kid joined in (for the bouquet, never saw a kid try to catch the garter!), I mostly remember the the grown ups would kind of step back and would pretend to fight for it, but let the kid "win" but then they weren't required to dance or anything. The kid was usually just happy to be the center of attention for a few minutes.
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  • I went to a wedding last year and my fiance caught the garter, and he placed it above the girls knee, and she freaked out [her boyfriend was watching]. I used to like the bouquet/garter thing when I was younger, and mostly because as a kid it seemed like a fun game, and it was also normal to be single LOL. As I got older I hated it. I don't think we will be having it at our wedding. Plus, some girls get vicious! I've narrowly missed being clocked in the eye by some chick tackling everyone just to catch the bouquet lol. 
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