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Feel like our situation is rushing/pushing us into getting married

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Re: Feel like our situation is rushing/pushing us into getting married

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    noelle24noelle24
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    EDK, I agree with you 100%.  
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    pvegaspvegas member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    @tidetravel Yes! That's exactly what I mean. That's an incredibly useful way to look at it.
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    notquiteblushingnotquiteblushing member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    This post makes me cornfused and I AM a lawyer.  Well anyway I hope you find one that knows about immigration because as everyone says it is complicated. Good luck!
    TTC since 07/11 Me: 32 AO PCOS/DH: 32 Lowish count/motility IUI#1-3 = BFN (Clomid, Clomid-->Femara, Injects) IVF#1 ER on 9/24 19 ER/19 M/9 F w/ICSI Transferred a 5AA and a 5BB on 9/29 Beta 10/9 = 139 Beta 10/11 = 287
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    tidetraveltidetravel member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    It probably also eliminates a lot of the stress :) Talk to an immigration lawyer to see what your options are as far as when exactly to plan the events based on any travel restrictions that may arise.  Good luck!
    Holy Crap. We survived the first year!
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    megk8ozmegk8oz member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Here's the thing, if you KNOW this guy is The One ... then you really shouldn't be concerned about the time apart. If you really think that doing the long distance thing is going to inevitably "end things", then this isn't The One. Because, yes, long distance sucks, and its hard ... but if this is really the person you're meant to spend the rest of your life with, you WILL make it work somehow. The fact that you're saying you feel like it's too soon means you really don't "know" as much as you'd like to "think" you know. This honestly sounds like you're going to rush getting married to avoid actually having to deal with whether or not you're involved with the right person. Like you're protecting yourself from finding out that if you WERE apart that you'd break up or find out that he really isn't The One. Which, yes, break ups are hard, but you really can't marry somebody just because you're afraid to find out that you really loved somebody that wasn't right for you. And aside from all of the emotional reasons why you should wait, Tide is right, you will be in HUGE legal trouble if the marriage doesn't work out and it somehow comes out that a big factor in why you got married involved his green card. Take the time apart. If he's really the right one, you're relationship will only end up stronger from the time apart.

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    dsouldivadsouldiva
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Ok so you are basically going to get married and then party with family & friends afterwards in their respective countries, this is not how your post read, but I get what you want to do. I still don't understand why you wouldn't tell your family? Even if it's crazy and feels rushed at the end of the day you are planning on being this guy's wife. If you know your own mind, and you seem pretty adament about that, why keep it a secret?
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