So I did something terrible... and now my mother isn't speaking to me

kmmssg · March 2014

Jen4948 said:

gm5 said:

@Jen4948 - I hestitate to respond to this because it seems like you might have some issues that you are projecting through this thread. I think the "MOBs are not "entitled" to be asked to go anywhere if they're not paying" comment is what struck me the most though. There are plenty of Mother's (parent's in general) out there that can't afford certain things for their children but it doesn't mean they love them any less. And to have a stipulation that if no money is forked over then basic human decency can be thrown out the window is wrong.

If going with the OP on a dress shopping trip really mattered, the OP's mother could have simply spoken up and asked to go along. Instead, she decided to get butt hurt and guilt trip the OP because she expected her mind to be read without her having to express herself directly, unlike the rest of the human race. That's what really bothers me. It's not an acceptable way to express "love."

Oh, for the love of God Jen - OP bought her dress 7 days after she got engaged. No one should have to call dibs or make all their wishes and hopes for the wedding known within a week. It was an unfortunate series of events and they are now on great terms with each other. It is understandable that MOB was upset and needed a couple of days to regroup. I would bet she felt badly too. I am with gm5 and mobkaz on this one. I, too, wonder if there are some issues you are projecting through this thread. Your response seems unnecessarily mean to me.

Jen4948 · March 2014

kmmssg said:

Jen4948 said:

gm5 said:

@Jen4948 - I hestitate to respond to this because it seems like you might have some issues that you are projecting through this thread. I think the "MOBs are not "entitled" to be asked to go anywhere if they're not paying" comment is what struck me the most though. There are plenty of Mother's (parent's in general) out there that can't afford certain things for their children but it doesn't mean they love them any less. And to have a stipulation that if no money is forked over then basic human decency can be thrown out the window is wrong.

If going with the OP on a dress shopping trip really mattered, the OP's mother could have simply spoken up and asked to go along. Instead, she decided to get butt hurt and guilt trip the OP because she expected her mind to be read without her having to express herself directly, unlike the rest of the human race. That's what really bothers me. It's not an acceptable way to express "love."

Oh, for the love of God Jen - OP bought her dress 7 days after she got engaged. No one should have to call dibs or make all their wishes and hopes for the wedding known within a week. It was an unfortunate series of events and they are now on great terms with each other. It is understandable that MOB was upset and needed a couple of days to regroup. I would bet she felt badly too. I am with gm5 and mobkaz on this one. I, too, wonder if there are some issues you are projecting through this thread. Your response seems unnecessarily mean to me.

No, for the love of fuck, @kmmssg, I have no "issues" and I don't appreciate your suggestion that I have any to project here. That's a really obnoxious assumption just because I don't agree with you, @gm5, @mobkaz, or whomever.

I do think that a grown woman who expects her daughter to read her mind and guilt-trips her about not asking her to accompany her on a shopping trip is the one with "issues."

I don't have to be "nice" about people playing stupid mind-reader games and guilt-tripping. The woman could have simply said, "I wish you had asked me-I would have loved to go with you" rather than giving her the silent treatment over three fucking days. I don't find that kind of behavior mature or appropriate for a supposedly grown woman in stable mental health.

I might add that I'm not the only one in this thread who expressed the same opinion, but you chose to target me and me alone, and not anyone else, for your hostile responses. Limiting your calling out to me and not anyone else who disagreed with you makes me feel targeted, regardless of your intention. So lose the "oh for the love of God Jen" crap or expand it to everyone else in this thread who doesn't share your opinion.

kmmssg · March 2014

Jen4948 said:

kmmssg said:

Jen4948 said:

gm5 said:

@Jen4948 - I hestitate to respond to this because it seems like you might have some issues that you are projecting through this thread. I think the "MOBs are not "entitled" to be asked to go anywhere if they're not paying" comment is what struck me the most though. There are plenty of Mother's (parent's in general) out there that can't afford certain things for their children but it doesn't mean they love them any less. And to have a stipulation that if no money is forked over then basic human decency can be thrown out the window is wrong.

If going with the OP on a dress shopping trip really mattered, the OP's mother could have simply spoken up and asked to go along. Instead, she decided to get butt hurt and guilt trip the OP because she expected her mind to be read without her having to express herself directly, unlike the rest of the human race. That's what really bothers me. It's not an acceptable way to express "love."

Oh, for the love of God Jen - OP bought her dress 7 days after she got engaged. No one should have to call dibs or make all their wishes and hopes for the wedding known within a week. It was an unfortunate series of events and they are now on great terms with each other. It is understandable that MOB was upset and needed a couple of days to regroup. I would bet she felt badly too. I am with gm5 and mobkaz on this one. I, too, wonder if there are some issues you are projecting through this thread. Your response seems unnecessarily mean to me.

No, for the love of fuck, @kmmssg, I have no "issues" and I don't appreciate your suggestion that I have any to project here. That's a really obnoxious assumption just because I don't agree with you, @gm5, @mobkaz, or whomever.

I do think that a grown woman who expects her daughter to read her mind and guilt-trips her about not asking her to accompany her on a shopping trip is the one with "issues."

I don't have to be "nice" about people playing stupid mind-reader games and guilt-tripping. The woman could have simply said, "I wish you had asked me-I would have loved to go with you" rather than giving her the silent treatment over three fucking days. I don't find that kind of behavior mature or appropriate for a supposedly grown woman in stable mental health.

I might add that I'm not the only one in this thread who expressed the same opinion, but you chose to target me and me alone, and not anyone else, for your hostile responses. Limiting your calling out to me and not anyone else who disagreed with you makes me feel targeted, regardless of your intention. So lose the "oh for the love of God Jen" crap or expand it to everyone else in this thread who doesn't share your opinion.

Jen - yes there were other responses that agreed with you but yours came across over the top harsh and mean. That is why I spoke to yours. Have a great day.

Jen4948 · March 2014

kmmssg said:

Jen4948 said:

kmmssg said:

Jen4948 said:

gm5 said:

@Jen4948 - I hestitate to respond to this because it seems like you might have some issues that you are projecting through this thread. I think the "MOBs are not "entitled" to be asked to go anywhere if they're not paying" comment is what struck me the most though. There are plenty of Mother's (parent's in general) out there that can't afford certain things for their children but it doesn't mean they love them any less. And to have a stipulation that if no money is forked over then basic human decency can be thrown out the window is wrong.

If going with the OP on a dress shopping trip really mattered, the OP's mother could have simply spoken up and asked to go along. Instead, she decided to get butt hurt and guilt trip the OP because she expected her mind to be read without her having to express herself directly, unlike the rest of the human race. That's what really bothers me. It's not an acceptable way to express "love."

Oh, for the love of God Jen - OP bought her dress 7 days after she got engaged. No one should have to call dibs or make all their wishes and hopes for the wedding known within a week. It was an unfortunate series of events and they are now on great terms with each other. It is understandable that MOB was upset and needed a couple of days to regroup. I would bet she felt badly too. I am with gm5 and mobkaz on this one. I, too, wonder if there are some issues you are projecting through this thread. Your response seems unnecessarily mean to me.

No, for the love of fuck, @kmmssg, I have no "issues" and I don't appreciate your suggestion that I have any to project here. That's a really obnoxious assumption just because I don't agree with you, @gm5, @mobkaz, or whomever.

I do think that a grown woman who expects her daughter to read her mind and guilt-trips her about not asking her to accompany her on a shopping trip is the one with "issues."

I don't have to be "nice" about people playing stupid mind-reader games and guilt-tripping. The woman could have simply said, "I wish you had asked me-I would have loved to go with you" rather than giving her the silent treatment over three fucking days. I don't find that kind of behavior mature or appropriate for a supposedly grown woman in stable mental health.

I might add that I'm not the only one in this thread who expressed the same opinion, but you chose to target me and me alone, and not anyone else, for your hostile responses. Limiting your calling out to me and not anyone else who disagreed with you makes me feel targeted, regardless of your intention. So lose the "oh for the love of God Jen" crap or expand it to everyone else in this thread who doesn't share your opinion.

Jen - yes there were other responses that agreed with you but yours came across over the top harsh and mean. That is why I spoke to yours. Have a great day.

So did yours. Have a great day.

kmmssg · March 2014

Thanks, I will

Jen4948 · March 2014

So will I

So I did something terrible... and now my mother isn't speaking to me

Re: So I did something terrible... and now my mother isn't speaking to me

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