Best Of

I hate cheering people on at the NYC marathon. It’s forever of waiting around in crowds, you barely see them, there’s no where to pee. 

VarunaTT said:

The professional stuffs will pass once the wedding is past. 

I think Ted did the right thing in not inviting her, b/c eff Sally, I think he's doing the right thing in not tattling on what she said (though I'd be hard pressed to keep such an ugly thing to myself).  Sally knows what she did and why she's not invited. Honestly, the co-workers freezing him out are behaving like children and deserve to be told as such.  I can be a petty b***h, so I'd probably start saying, "Sally knows why I didn't invite her, please ask her, b/c I don't speak to her anymore."

It does seem to me that Ted is being a bit naive on what the consequences would be, so he needs a bit of a CTJ talk b/c it might not pass after the wedding in the personal relationships.

This is EXACTLY what I would do.  There is no way I would have invited her either.  It seems like LW is more bothered than Ted by the work ramifications.  Ted's an idiot if he didn't know this would happen.  If it's causing issues doing his job, I would privately tell the manager that and leave it as "we had a personal falling out, she's and the team are refusing to work with me professional because of it." 

The professional stuffs will pass once the wedding is past. 

I think Ted did the right thing in not inviting her, b/c eff Sally, I think he's doing the right thing in not tattling on what she said (though I'd be hard pressed to keep such an ugly thing to myself).  Sally knows what she did and why she's not invited. Honestly, the co-workers freezing him out are behaving like children and deserve to be told as such.  I can be a petty b***h, so I'd probably start saying, "Sally knows why I didn't invite her, please ask her, b/c I don't speak to her anymore."

It does seem to me that Ted is being a bit naive on what the consequences would be, so he needs a bit of a CTJ talk b/c it might not pass after the wedding in the personal relationships.

I'm sorry, he forcefully grabbed your child and left bruises and your concern is what they call him?

Don’t see him ever again because he laid his hands on your kid. 

From the corporate culture I picked up in the letter, these "send offs" are given when a person quits.  I assume usually under good circumstances, like retirement or another position.

I think the LW is a bit wrong in their thinking.  They keep mentioning it's the employee's choice.  To an extent it is because the employee could easily keep their job.  But where the rubber meets the road, this employee isn't quitting.  She is being fired.  Generally, you don't send a card around the office and have a cake in the break room when someone is fired, lol.

short+sassy said:

Prudence

I am the manager of a great employee who has been in the same position for more than a decade. She has chosen not to be vaccinated. We haven’t discussed vaccination in depth, but she mentioned that she would leave if required to vaccinate. I reinforced that she has been a great employee and I would hate to see her leave, but I respect her decisions.

Last week, our employer sent out a letter requiring full vaccination soon. I will ask her to reconsider, but expect to plan for a successor. Technically, she’ll be let go for no longer meeting the requirements of the job. However, it feels like she is making the choice to leave. Our organization would normally celebrate the accomplishments of people who choose to leave. This feels like something in between. What is an appropriate send off for those sent off?

— Not Dissing the Dismissed

A stack of published scientific articles on the efficacy and safety of the vaccines and the disservice that those refusing to get them are doing as members of society.

OK, so maybe the above is not appropriate as a manager, but the manager should ALSO not use company time or funds to do something that is appearing in any way as a reward for a person who is not complying with company policy.   

LW, you're a manager.  Your job is to enforce company policy.  You're allowed to thank the employee for their service and assuming the door is open if the employee opts to vaccinate, you can tell the employee that they're welcome to reapply if they change their vaccination status. 

There's a lot that LW is assuming here. She's not wrong for being hurt, necessarily, but unless you say to your friends "I really need your support here, it's really important to me for X reasons," you can't assume they magically know. Maybe the daughter beat you to that punch by saying "I really want Mom to be the one who comes because X" - my daughter would.

And there always was and still is no obligation to buy school fundraising stuff, so proceed however you want there.

This is one of those things where I think "close knit team of coworkers" translates to toxic AF. 

Basically everyone sucks, but if I was LW I would have totally told Alice what Sally had said, just before I chewed her ass out for calling me to ask for an invitation. 

Sally was WAY out of line here. And honestly sounds like she has a thing for Bob. I wouldn’t want someone who wished that I died at my wedding.