Destination Weddings Discussions

How to talk him into a destination wedding

I've been really frustrated lately looking at prices and realizing that we cant afford the wedding we imagined. I really think that a destination wedding would allow us to stay in budget and still have a nice wedding, but my FI doesnt want a destination wedding because he knows that most of our friends and family wouldnt be able to come. Do you ladies have any advice? 

Re: How to talk him into a destination wedding

  • Hmm...maybe ask him who he really wants at the wedding the most, who he is most worried about not being able to come? Then ask those people if you were to do a destination wedding would they be able to come. Maybe more people will be able to come than he is expecting and that will make him feel better about it? Or does he just really want a big wedding with every single person there? Maybe if you tell him that realistically you guys are unable to afford a really big wedding and that means you are going to have to cut the guest list anyway, he might not worry so much about all the people that wouldn't be able to come to a destination wedding... My fiance just didn't care what we did so it was pretty easy haha 
  • We talked minor wedding talk even before we were engaged and when I mentioned Destination he was totally opposed.  

    Then we get engaged and start putting together guest lists, he realized how many people were on the list, and as I told him he needs to try and cut back on his 150+ guests (yes, that number was ONLY his side!) for budget reasons, he realized he won't be able to cut it down w/o feeling guilty.  All of a sudden he was open to the DW idea since he knew not everyone would make it and he didn't need to avoid inviting everyone (literally, everyone) to the wedding, lol!  We had 30 guests show up in Jamaica, including our "VIP" guests, and it was perfect!  And well within budget!

    I think maybe if you compare costs and as @samleanne33 said, talk with those most important people to see whether they'd definitely go.  That may help him to be more open minded about it.

    Also, we ended up budgeting to cover expenses for his mother to go (she has a very fixed income) so not sure if that would be an option for any one particular family member (or friend) that can't make it but is super important to him :-)
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  • Whilst my FI was always in support of the DW most of his side are the ones who cant attend. So we have decided to host something casual at home before heading off for the wedding just so we can celebrate with everybody. Maybe you could suggest something like a casual party before/after the wedding to celebrate with guests who cant make it. That way you are getting your dream destination wedding but also getting to celebrate with most of your guest list.

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  • @missmo14 Great idea, totally forgot about the "at home" celebration, lol!! We also had one before we left.
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  • the ladies have some good advice!

    I would also just give a word of caution that you want to have a discussion between the two of you to find out what you both want out of the wedding. I would hate for you to "talk him into it" and then have him be disappointed or sad with the day! (not that I think that's possible because DW are awesome) 

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