Letting Guest Know You Will Have an Alcohol Free Recption

Jehold

Due to my fiancé's  religious beliefs and my families general dislike of alcohol we have chosen not to have alcohol at our wedding.  I was just wondering how do you let guests know that you will not have alcohol at the reception.

Jen4948

You don't do that in advance.  When they get to the reception and learn that no alcohol is available, they have the options of leaving, which is annoying but reveals their true colors, or staying and being gracious guests.

Gracious guests do not expect specific offerings and then get huffy and/or threaten to leave if they aren't given what they want-even alcohol.  It isn't up to them to dictate what their hosts should serve them.

itzMS

IMHO, it would be terribly presumptuous to announce a dry wedding. To put it into perspective...have you ever heard of a couple who is having an open bar announcing BOOZE BOOZE WE'RE HAVING LOTS OF BOOZE!!!!!

Obviously not.

Just as you and your FI likely respect those who do serve alcohol at their event, your polite guests will respect your decision to not serve alcohol. (though if it were me...DH & I would head to the bar afterwards ;-)!!!)

southernbelle0915

Jehold said:

Due to my fiancé's  religious beliefs and my families general dislike of alcohol we have chosen not to have alcohol at our wedding.  I was just wondering how do you let guests know that you will not have alcohol at the reception.

You don't need to announce it. If you feel inclined, start spreading the word subtly and tactfully through word of mouth. In other words... this:

guest: "I'm very excited to get drunk at your wedding!"

you: "haha, Well we won't be serving alcohol, but the food and music will be great. Looking forward to having you there!"

Not either of these:

• "HEY ALL YOU BOOZE HOUNDS!! Don't expect alcohol because my FH is religious and doesn't approve.." 
  
• on invitation: "please join us for a DRY reception" 
  

JoanE2012

Jehold said:

Due to my fiancé's  religious beliefs and my families general dislike of alcohol we have chosen not to have alcohol at our wedding.  I was just wondering how do you let guests know that you will not have alcohol at the reception.

Why would you want to tell guests ahead of time that there is no alcohol?  Do you think people will base their attendance on whether alcohol is served?  Or are you giving people fair warning so they can sneak in their own?  I don't get it.

doeydo

I don't think you need to tell them.  But if you choose to, I would just say it in person when the wedding comes up.  However, if people try to bring their own or smuggle it in flasks, it could cause issues with your venue and the law.

alithebride

i'm assuming that it wont be any surprise to fi's family or yours will it?

no reason to announce.

 

LyricStorm

You don't need to give anyone the heads up about no alcohol at your wedding, My husband and i are renewing our vows and we are no having alcohol or dancing because of our belief, we feel that those who are coming are coming to fellowship with us not to get drunk and act like heathens, I believe your guest will be the same way, they want to share in a moment that is so dear to and and having booze shouldn't make a difference to them.
*Best Wishes*

manateehugger

LyricStorm said:

You don't need to give anyone the heads up about no alcohol at your wedding, My husband and i are renewing our vows and we are no having alcohol or dancing because of our belief, we feel that those who are coming are coming to fellowship with us not to get drunk and act like heathens, I believe your guest will be the same way, they want to share in a moment that is so dear to and and having booze shouldn't make a difference to them.
*Best Wishes*

While I respect your beliefs, saying that alcohol makes people "act like heathens" is a little much and judgmental. 

JoanE2012

LyricStorm said:

You don't need to give anyone the heads up about no alcohol at your wedding, My husband and i are renewing our vows and we are no having alcohol or dancing because of our belief, we feel that those who are coming are coming to fellowship with us not to get drunk and act like heathens, I believe your guest will be the same way, they want to share in a moment that is so dear to and and having booze shouldn't make a difference to them.
*Best Wishes*

What kind of people do you hang around?!  Our wedding had open bar the entire night and we had no problems.  We treated everyone like adults and no one got out hand. 

LyricStorm

I mean @JoanE2012 that what I see when I go to weddings, Yes it starts off nice and sweet but then as the night goes on and the dancing start people just act silly to me.. I mean if you look at a lot of the post of wedding reception people just want to go for what... FREE FOOD AND FREE BOOZE... And that’s OK if that is what the couple wants but i am one who don't like the idea or the image and that’s OK too.

manateehugger

You can express that you prefer dry weddings without calling people heathens...

And I very much enjoy food and drink at weddings, which is why I end to make sure we have good food and drink at our wedding, but I don't believe that's why most people attend weddings. 

I think you need to check your judgement here. 

LyricStorm

Not judgement just what i seen but as i state it is all up to the couple cause that is who it is about the Bride and the Groom @PDKH and @JoanE2012

manateehugger

I don't think anyone here said that serving alcohol is not a personal choice - because it is. However, calling people who choose to indulge is, in my opinion, very judgmental. Words have meaning.

LyricStorm

ok @DKH

LyricStorm

OK @PDKH....

kitty8403

scribe95 said:

If your guests know you and your families at all it sounds like won't be a surprise. I wouldn't worry about it.

^Exactly. Weddings in my circle, I know to generally expect short, sweet, cheap, and dry. In FI's circle, we know it's split between that and the ones where you'll be there all day, maybe multiple days, and probably run into a lot of booze.

doeydo

LyricStorm said: I mean @JoanE2012 that what I see when I go to weddings, Yes it starts off nice and sweet but then as the night goes on and the dancing start people just act silly to me.. I mean if you look at a lot of the post of wedding reception people just want to go for what... FREE FOOD AND FREE BOOZE... And that’s OK if that is what the couple wants but i am one who don't like the idea or the image and that’s OK too.

 "I can't wait for my sister's wedding, I'm gonna get so wasted, for free!" is not something that I would ever think.  I think guests who are close with the bride and groom would attend the wedding because they want to witness the couple's union and celebrate with them, not because of the free food and alcohol. I am sure wedding crashers are in it for the free food and booze, though.

AddieCake

I would totally act like a drunken heathen at a wedding if PDKH was there. That's b/c I have a girl crush on her, though. 

OP, don't make a big announcement. I always feel that doing so is like making some kind of apology for the kind of wedding you're having, and that's just not necessary. 

alithebride

LyricStorm said:

Not judgement just what i seen but as i state it is all up to the couple cause that is who it is about the Bride and the Groom @PDKH and @JoanE2012

you need to start hanging around a better sort of people then. that's not normal.  

STARMOON44

Unclear to me when exactly we established that "heathens" are drunks. Pretty sure there are plenty of Christians out there drinking too- I know this one does! If you're looking for a word for people who get drunk and behave inappropriately at weddings, rude works.

banana468

As a Catholic I believe our Lord turned water into wine. Why wouldn't I drink it?

OP, if you want a dry reception, knock yourself out. It's NBD to have one.

MandyMost

I've only been invited to one wedding that wasn't the typical ceremony-cocktails hour-dinner-dancing type of event. It was a friend from college who was Muslim and didn't drink. We were all friends for years, and the rest of the group drank, and he didn't. It wasn't a big deal to any of us. When he invited us to his wedding, he let us know there wouldn't be drinking, because he knew that we all associated weddings with drinking and dancing. It was nice to know ahead of time. But word of mouth was fine. No one would describe it as the "most fun" wedding ever, but it was nice, and everyone was happy to celebrate with him. 

ohannabelle

MandyMost said:

I've only been invited to one wedding that wasn't the typical ceremony-cocktails hour-dinner-dancing type of event. It was a friend from college who was Muslim and didn't drink. We were all friends for years, and the rest of the group drank, and he didn't. It wasn't a big deal to any of us. When he invited us to his wedding, he let us know there wouldn't be drinking, because he knew that we all associated weddings with drinking and dancing. It was nice to know ahead of time. But word of mouth was fine. No one would describe it as the "most fun" wedding ever, but it was nice, and everyone was happy to celebrate with him. 

I want to applaud the all around good manners in the above post. The host who tactfully let his guests know there would be no drinking without making a giant issue of it, the guests who already knew and cared about the groom enough to respect his decisions (without having to sneak flasks in) and above all, that people still are graceful enough to accept what's offered without complaint. Being there to celebrate a friend's happiness, after all, is the basic idea of the thing. This made me happy.

jenniferurs

I would let people know ahead of time via word of mouth.