Relationship Timelines...spinoff

Riss2893

Taking forever to poop must be a guy thing. My FI sometimes takes his tablet with him and I always find random books in the bathroom. I have stomach/digestive issues so when I have to go I usually have to go omgrightnow (which can be unpleasant at times, obviously)

JCbride2015

OMG ladies, this is so far my favorite thread ever on TK.  I just have to join in.

Fi takes forever to shit.  He brings his phone in there with him and reads internet comedy while he goes.  Sometimes I'll think he left the house and went somewhere, he's in there so long.  I just don't get it-- if nothing is coming out, why do you stay on the toilet?  Just try again later.

The real boundary-breaking moment a few months into our relationship came not with me, but my sister.  She must have been 12 at the time and she clogged our toilet BAD.  Fi and I were both in high school and he was hanging at our house for some reason.  My mom could not plunge that toilet to save her life.  My poor mom has little chicken arms.  Bf and I were on the couch trying not to hear her plunging the hell out of the toilet, when finally she comes out and asks Bf: "What would I have to give you to plunge this toilet for us?"  His answer: "A lifetime of chocolate chip cookies."

He goes into the bathroom, and it was like war with the toilet.  I hear grunting, shouting, splashing.  Finally I hear it flush. I went in to check on him: and there was poop ON THE CEILING.  Flecks all over the bathroom walls.  Bf looked like he had just fought his way out of the trenches.

He went upstairs to take a shower.  My sister was mortified.  He still makes fun of her about it, and my mom still bakes him cookies.

lauracutter

A little over 1 year into our relationship my now Fi and I went to London.  We both got food poisoning.  Like, real bad.  We both had stuff coming out of both ends for DAYS.  It was disgusting. That was a real moment for us.  Nothing like a shared vomiting/shitting experience to bring a couple closer.  It was so gross. 

[Deleted User]

This thread is hilarious! H and I didn't leave much mystery in our relationship for long. It was actually me that farted in front of him first. We were cuddling on the couch watching TV when I felt one coming on. I made a face and he asked what was wrong. "Uuh....I need to fart." "Is it just air?" "No, it feels worse." H pulled a blanket over my lap, asked me to turn my butt away and resumed watching TV. I knew he was a keeper! 

bethsmiles

@KnotPorscha - Vendor ^^

Pepperally

JordanF13 said:

This thread is hilarious! H and I didn't leave much mystery in our relationship for long. It was actually me that farted in front of him first. We were cuddling on the couch watching TV when I felt one coming on. I made a face and he asked what was wrong. "Uuh....I need to fart." "Is it just air?" "No, it feels worse." H pulled a blanket over my lap, asked me to turn my butt away and resumed watching TV. I knew he was a keeper! 

Ok, can it ever be "just air"??? lol.  It's rarely just air with me!

lovemyrunner

Just the other day, we were having sex and something about the way my ta tas were smashed against his chest caused a farting noise to escape from the twins with every thrust.  We ignored it for the first two or three times before he started laughing and I quickly followed.  Eventually, I got him to stop laughing, re-focus and change positions so we could finish

shaivana

@Swazzle you guys sound like me and my SO, we are very open about those things haha. I remember when I farted in front of him for the first time. He thought it was weird that I didn't like to fart in front of him since it was a natural bodily function and I just called myself being lady-like. 

Then one day I was playing around and tried to pick him up (don't really know how we go to doing that) and right when I got him off the ground I let out a huge fart and fell over on the bed all embarrassed. After that, I just didn't care anymore and have been comfortable letting one loose every now and then without a care. With as much time as we spend together, it is hard to keep it in!