African American Weddings

Baby Shower & Reception in one?!?!?!?

Just found out im 5 weeks. (yayyy me) due 8-24. me and my fiancee are planning to get married in the summer we were planning before i found out. im thinking mid july or first week in aug. we are not that trad. since we are young 23 & 24. for the wedding i wanted outside venue for the ceremony and reception inside. Something light and simple and cute. Majority of our family live outta town, we don't have many friends to have a baby shower. So i came up with the idea of having a reception and baby shower in one. We wont be able to get our families to come back for a baby shower when they live out of town come to think about it I don't think anybody would travel for anything less then a wedding lol. The same ppl we are inviting to the wedding which is 60-80 ppl plus children are the same ppl we want to our shower. I would still do the norm for a wedding reception although im not into baby shower games my event planner/host (step mom who owns her own event planning company) wants me too so bad so ima think about it. Overall it sounds like a good idea any advice does it seem tacky? 

Re: Baby Shower & Reception in one?!?!?!?

  • Can you have the wedding on a friday or saturday and then a baby shower on a sat or sun? when fam still in town? I wouldn't do them the same day.
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    tirathemrsSoon to Be Mrs Jay
  • Shae I see the practicality in your reasoning because your family and friends live out of town and won't travel for both, do it all at once, especially because the timing would already have it happen all at once.  Forgive me for a second, I might struggle to properly articulate this.  When it comes to the ceremony of things, procedure, order that kinda stuff, I'm a rules girl and if I opened an invitation to a combination wedding reception baby shower, I'd be happy for you and I'd go but I'd think it was weird.   Tacky as a description calls for more judginess than might be necessary but girl I'mma tell you I'd think yeah this is odd.    In my defense, I'd have the same reaction if you mixed a wedding reception with anything else.   Thing is if it's all close friends and family, then judgment shouldn't be an issue.  How cool is it that you have an event planner in the family.   Google the term combination wedding and baby shower, there are a couple different schools of thought on the subject.   Sorry, I know that was virtually no help at all. 
    shaeybpearls687
  • Can you have the wedding on a friday or saturday and then a baby shower on a sat or sun? when fam still in town? I wouldn't do them the same day.

    i was planning for a sat due to ppl work schedules so they can be in and out without effecting there working days. 
  • i did a lot of research and I felt like all these answers were from "white" ppl who thought it was a sin. Everyone kept calling ppl dumb and stupid and they need to have tea and they can only have one. I mean its not like i dont have the money to do both on different days thats not the case im leaning towards the idea due to people traveling not to mention we really dont live here either its our home town and everybody is closer here then florida... so i thought the idea of having everything packed in one day wouldnt be so bad... the only reason why im enteraining the idea. your comment was more helpful then you think.. Thank you!!! 
  • I was just coming in here to co sign what tash (footballwife) said above.  If your guests are well informed in advance, then they'll know to accommodate for the extra time of staying for your shower on sunday (see that, it's already planned in my head lol).   Chances are, they're gonna fly or drive home from a Saturday wedding on Sunday anyway, now they just know to make it later (if you have a morning shower -  oooh please don't hate on tea, fancy ladies in white gloves love to sit around and sip with their pinkies out - don't know this from experience I'm just sayin lol).  good luck lovie.  come back and let us know what you decide.

     

    p.s. LMAO!!!! at the quotes.  Um, girl I don't think the fact that they're white is a secret to them. LOL!!!  I'm just playing with you don't mind me.  

    I didn't even say congratulations about all your joyous news.   Hey new mommie!!!! 

     

    shaeyb
  • HERES MY 2 CENTS

    If having your family there is super important and you know for sure that you wouldnt be able to get them to come back on another date and time them go ahead and do both 
    (scenario 1) Have your wedding reception early (breakfast/brunch food) and have the shower later that day giving everyone time to celebrate for both events
    (scenario 2) Have the reception on that Friday afternoon and then the baby shower on that saturday.. 
    sultryzulu said it would be sort of odd to walk into a room for a wedding reception with baby shower decor... ijs lol

    Lilypie - H1jI


    Daisypath - MFL5



    shaeyb
  • hey gurlie.. I agree with @footballwife77, @sultryzulu (I was waiting for you to drop some knowledge..lol) and @misstira.. I think for you the best route would be what @misstira suggested scenario 1 because you stated that you plan on having everyone come to celebrate on Saturday. I also think you got to prepare people because I would be slightly confused so you def. have to clarify bc people might think that you made a mistake and planned the same event on both days and you should also let them know that you would like them to come to both events.

     Sidenote congrats.. but if it were me I would think to have it separate days (same weekend)..bc people come to what they want to attend so im sure if you put it out there they will attend 

    Daisypath - (PNE7)
    LouisianaLove33shaeyb
  • well congrats on your pregnancy and engagement. I agree with all the previous posts!
  • Thanks. ima wait til i get out this first trimester ask some guest their opinion once i make the huge announcement and go from there.. im still entertaining the idea of combining but i guest ima listen to the guest thoghts and see how they feel about attending it and go from there... Either way its still going to be a epic and amazing event!!! Thanks you guys were very helpful without being so crazy about it i probley would of cried due to me being so emotional...
  • First congrats for both things. Yay baby! Yay marriage! Both super awsome life events.


    Thay being said, I would be confused and not know what to bring. Do I bring a baby bouncer and diapers or do I bring new flatware and new home type stuff. Wedding or baby gifts? I suppose both would be good but folks aint got thay kinda money. And the men I know would be so irritated to be around all them women talkin bout babies.

    So I'm with my the other ladies, do them separately. Same weekend maybe but not the same time. Or just don't do the baby shower. Someone may throw you one anyway. The wedding is a much bigger deal. The baby is important, but the shower isn't so much.

  • I would do them separately. Is there a reason that you have to have a baby shower? Usually, the mom-to-be isn't the one planning the shower. I am sure that people will send you stuff for the baby if you don't have a shower. Also, combining the two events can be costly. For example, guests are coming from out of town, giving you cash for your wedding and bringing a gift for the baby. That can add up fast.  
  • First, congratulations on your newest addition! 

    I would do them separately, but for a slightly different reason that some of the other posts. Your child will consume so much of your life, sometimes stressful, sometimes bliss. Because you are starting your marriage around the same time you start parenthood, you won't have much "me and him" time. Take time out to celebrate the love of your relationship; give it the attention it deserves. Then, as a separate event (Maybe as a brunch? I'm all for brunches), have your wedding reception. 

    As a dude, I usually feel out of place at a baby shower because it's very mommy-centered. I've even organized a baby shower last year and it still was a mom-fest.  I don't feel I can contribute much to a baby shower other than money or a gift because I cannot relate to the biological transformation of giving birth. Unless you make your baby shower daddy-inclusive, the guys will likely feel lost.  

    Sunday, May 18, 2014 - Baltimore, Maryland

    "Each time you love, love as deeply as if it were forever" - Audre Lorde

    tirathemrsLouisianaLove33SenecafLaVaH112
  • minsu5 said:
    First, congratulations on your newest addition! 

    I would do them separately, but for a slightly different reason that some of the other posts. Your child will consume so much of your life, sometimes stressful, sometimes bliss. Because you are starting your marriage around the same time you start parenthood, you won't have much "me and him" time. Take time out to celebrate the love of your relationship; give it the attention it deserves. Then, as a separate event (Maybe as a brunch? I'm all for brunches), have your wedding reception. 

    As a dude, I usually feel out of place at a baby shower because it's very mommy-centered. I've even organized a baby shower last year and it still was a mom-fest.  I don't feel I can contribute much to a baby shower other than money or a gift because I cannot relate to the biological transformation of giving birth. Unless you make your baby shower daddy-inclusive, the guys will likely feel lost.  
    minsu5

    Lilypie - H1jI


    Daisypath - MFL5



    LeciaBminsu5
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