Asking for time off for honeymoon... how much is reasonable?

MKM2014

**Original Post Deleted**

Thank you for all of your contributions, I do NOT think I will be trying to get 2 weeks in order to spend time with family and honeymoon soon after the wedding.

Basically, I have 7 paid days off that I can play with in 2014 and every single one is going toward our wedding. Instead of pushing back the wedding and/or honeymoon until 2015, or taking a shorter honeymoon and losing out on time spent with family from out of town, I think we will plan our honeymoon for 2 weeks later. This way, we will get at least 2 extra days (since we can leave on Saturday rather than Sunday and the Monday after the work week I'll be taking off is Labor Day), maybe 3 days (haven't decided if I will use the 7th day for the Monday after wedding or the Friday before honeymoon week to extend it that little bit longer). So, we will definitely get Sunday (maybe Monday) to visit with out of town guests and can also spend some evenings after work with those who are planning an extended stay. Going back to work on either Monday or Tuesday after the wedding will be very strange, but I think with only 2 weeks between the wedding and the honeymoon it'll still feel like a honeymoon rather than "just a vacation". And who knows, maybe I'll appreciate the extra time between so I don't have to worry about last minute honeymoon details and packing at the same time I'm wrapping up the last minute wedding details and decorating etc.  

So it isn't my total ideal, it's a compromise, but a comparatively little one I think.

jneen101

I would just use the 4 discretionary days, 2 vacation, and 1 personal.  You could take off Aug 8th, then the week of the 11th, and Monday the 18th.  I understand why you want the two full weeks but I personally would be uncomfortable doing that. 

emmyg65

I wouldn't take the full two weeks. I had lots of vacation days accumulated before my wedding, and I still only took the Thursday and Friday before and the week after (so seven days total). PP had a good suggestion for how much time to take off. Either spend fewer nights in Hawaii, or take the long trip as an anniversary trip.

freebread03

Hopefully I can offer a different perspective...I earn 25 days a year (a lot of days!) and it can be difficult to use while maintaining my utilization (the number of billable hours I work against a total of 1920 workable hours a year).  I'm also a supervisor, and approve people's time off.  Personally, I wouldn't want to go into the negative (or take time without pay) during my first year at a company.  

In my first year, I barely took any time; after I'd been with the company for a year, I took 8 days the next summer for a Greece trip with my friends.  Since then, I've taken 2.5 weeks straight each summer for big trips, but it also took a lot of preparation for me to be able to do that (and I've certainly earned the ability to do so through top performance ratings, etc.)

I would side eye  (just a tiny bit though) taking that much time before you've been with a company for even a year-and I'd also be skeptical in granting that much time off for one of my junior staff who asked.  I'd be more concerned with going into the negative on my vacation days or leaving my teammates with my workload when gone before I'd really had the opportunity to demonstrate my value and criticality to the team (since you've been there such a short time).

JoanE2012

I would just use the vacation, personal and discretionary time.  I think trying to take off 11 consecutive business days when you've been there 9 months is pushing it.  The economy is still pretty crappy (though perhaps you're in a good field!), so I wouldn't want to push my luck. 

If I were you, I'd go away for a week to another destination and save Hawaii for your one year anniversary when you a full 2 weeks +.

jdluvr06

JoanE2012 said:

I would just use the vacation, personal and discretionary time.  I think trying to take off 11 consecutive business days when you've been there 9 months is pushing it.  The economy is still pretty crappy (though perhaps you're in a good field!), so I wouldn't want to push my luck. 

If I were you, I'd go away for a week to another destination and save Hawaii for your one year anniversary when you a full 2 weeks +.

This.

MKM2014

** Edit**

 

Thanks everyone! I think we came up with a decent compromise! I deleted the original post and just filled in our new plan. You are right, I was very uncomfortable with the idea of asking and based on your feedback I am just going to make alternate plans and hopefully those will be approved.

lyndausvi

Some industries are easier than others to get vacation time.  I had no problem getting a month off.  It was our off season and it actually helped out the company by not having to pay me when there was little business.  It also allowed others more hours than they would have gotten because I was off the schedule. 

My dad is an engineer and starting "buying" weekends from the first year of his new job.  Never hurt him professional either.    However, there are other industries, especially ones with billable hours where is much harder and even frowned upon.  

My sister's first year my parents moved to England and she wanted to fly over for christmas but was too afraid to ask since she didn't have vacation time either.  My dad said it doesn't hurt to ask.  The worse they can say is no.  So she went to her boss, told him the situation.   He gave her the time off, not all the time, but enough to satisfied both their needs.  She never forgot how nice he was and worked even harder for him for saying yes.  

 If you have a good relationship with your boss I don't know why you can't have a nice honest conversation with them?  Feel them out.  Don't go in a say "we booked 2 weeks for the wedding I need 'x' time off".  Start off by saying "we are staring to make plans for the wedding/honeymoon.  We would like to take 'x' time off. Is that possible since I've only been here a short time?  Maybe too much?"  See where it goes.  They knew you are getting married, so it's not a complete surprise you want to take a honeymoon.

MKM2014

I should have specified in my original post! I am not in a "billable hours" field, I work for a large multi national nonprofit in the development department of my local branch. The only time of year that we are not allowed time off in my department is Christmas time, as we have many end of the year mail outs and specific programs for holiday assistance that keep everyone very busy. I am an entry level employee, technically an administrative assistant. I work closely with events and seasonal initiatives, my job is essentially always changing as I am usually borrowed by which ever section of my department has the biggest project at that time. As I've said, Christmas is the busiest time by far, and summers are the slowest. We have a separate youth department that is responsible for all of the summer camp initiatives. We have a small event in September and a fair sized charity golf tournament (I believe in June), but no big events in the month of August or within a couple weeks of my original plans. So theoretically, this is the best time of the year for me to sneak away. Unpaid time is something a lot of first year employees take. Our discretionary time also comes out of our sick bank, and I will have 8-9 days accrued by the wedding. I worked 20-30 hours a week from my senior year of high school all through college (dif employer obviously), and have only taken one sick day in the past 4 years BUT I know there is always the chance I will come down with something bad and not have the 4 discretionary days to spare, in which case I will have to take a part of the time unpaid anyway. Unpaid time isn't a big deal, many people take it because it is strictly forbidden to take more paid days than earned (you can't take then on credit). I just worry about taking all that time at once, even at a good time- like, maybe it looks selfish? Because we will be booking flights in the next few weeks I will have to sit down with my boss anyway, I suppose it isn't harmful to lay out the two plans and leave it to his discretion, so I don't put him in as much of an awkward position.

JoanE2012

OP - Next time, simply add your new plans to the thread, don't delete your original post.  This way, anyone can enter the conversation and know the whole story.

That said, many people delay their honeymoons.  We planned to leave one week after the wedding.  Sure, we'd be going back to work.....but we'd be able to relax and pack with all the wedding craziness behind us.  In the end, our wedding was rescheduled to due a hurricane, so we had our honeymoon BEFORE the wedding!  THAT definitely felt weird and not very honeymoon-like.  

MKM2014

Haha I should have just summarized it, I wrote a novel for my original post! Basically ideally I wanted to take 2 weeks after my wedding plus the day before off, but 4 of the 11 days would be unpaid and I was hesitant to ask my supervisor. The reason I wanted all the time is to spend a few days with out of town family before leaving, traveling to Hawaii from Michigan (which is quite a long haul) & having enough time to make it "worth the flights", and then having the weekend after we get back to recover before jumping back into work- mostly from the time change which I think is 5-6 hours depending on when you go.

If I could do things over I would get married in May lots more honeymoon options. However, even though we are marrying in August which is prime hurricane season we are actually considering St Lucia as well. We are using airline points to book & originally were told it wouldn't be an option for us with flight availability, but have recently figured out a way to get there in the first week of September. A couple we know honeymooned there during the same week last year and loved it. Of course that's no guarantee of the weather this coming year so we would still purchase insurance but I think it's encouraging. We've got the 2 options for destinations as it stands, and most likely in either case it'll be a 2-3 week wait from wedding to honeymoon.

Packing post wedding is definitely a perk, as is the time with relatives. From everything I hear you are so busy leading up to the wedding and participating in all the reception rituals and making the rounds greeting your guests that quality time with those out of towners would just be too hard to fit in if you plan on leaving the day after the wedding!

melbelleup

Glad to see you figured things out! I'm taking the week off before my wedding and then honeymooning the week after I return. It seemed to work a lot better with my work schedule and also I didn't want to honeymoon during 4th of july week, so there's that too. haha!

delujm0

It completely depends on where you work and what they generally allow - i can take as much time as i want at once as long as i have it on the calendar in advance.  Our busy time is typically the first 3-4 business days of any month (and especially after quarter-ends), so I try to be in the office for that.  My boss did tell me if i had to miss the busy time for the honeymoon she would cover for me because that's a special occassion.

 

I'm getting married 5/31/14 and then leaving for the honeymoon 6/6/14.  I'm going to work June 2-5 and take the day before the wedding off as well as 11 days for the honeymoon.  But i'm lucky and get 25 days a year - plus i was able to roll a few forward that i saved from 2013.  And we're getting married in the city where we currently live and work, so i won't have to deal with any travel for the wedding itself.