• Images
  • Text
  • Find a Couple + Registry
GO
Ceremony and Vow Ideas

Walking down the aisle dilemma

Hey all,

See if this makes sense... So, I was raised by my grandparents, but my father was around.. and now he's started to help us pay for the wedding.  I always figured my grandpa would walk me down the aisle, but he has said he'd rather that my dad do it, because he knows it'll be important to him.  And my dad is fairly sensitive, and I really don't care enough about the whole act of being "given away" enough to try to make a point by having my grandpa do it.  It's important to my dad, so I'll probably just have him do it.  It still seems weird though, so my thought was I'd either have them BOTH do it, or I'd walk myself down.  Is this done, ever?  The first time I mentioned it to a friend of mine, she seemed horrified that I'd walk myself down.. but I have supported myself since I left home.  I don't know, maybe I'm over-thinking and I should just have them both.  Thoughts??  

Thanks!

Re: Walking down the aisle dilemma

  • jaime232 said:
    Hey all,

    See if this makes sense... So, I was raised by my grandparents, but my father was around.. and now he's started to help us pay for the wedding.  I always figured my grandpa would walk me down the aisle, but he has said he'd rather that my dad do it, because he knows it'll be important to him.  And my dad is fairly sensitive, and I really don't care enough about the whole act of being "given away" enough to try to make a point by having my grandpa do it.  It's important to my dad, so I'll probably just have him do it.  It still seems weird though, so my thought was I'd either have them BOTH do it, or I'd walk myself down.  Is this done, ever?  The first time I mentioned it to a friend of mine, she seemed horrified that I'd walk myself down.. but I have supported myself since I left home.  I don't know, maybe I'm over-thinking and I should just have them both.  Thoughts??  

    Thanks!

    All of these are totally fine options. I've seen a bride walk herself down, I've seen a bride have more than one person walk her down. They are fine. People get so stuck on the movie version of weddings where the father always does it.

    If you want to fly solo, go for it.

    If you don't want your dad to walk you, I think you should stand firm and have your grandpa walk you. Just don't mention it to your dad and if he asks, say something like, "I'm sorry, but this was a very personal decision and it's already been made."

    If you want to have them both walk you down, you can do that too (or do the "trade-off" where one walks you halfway, and the other the rest of the way).

    image
    doeydo[Deleted User]
  • I agree with PP. You can spare feelings by having both walk you. Or just walk yourself. I will be walking myself down the aisle.
  • princessleia22princessleia22 Oceanfront Property in Arizona member
    Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 1000 Comments First Answer

    It's completely up to you and any option you mentioned sounds good.  I would go with whatever you want and what is important to you. And if you don't have them both walk you, you can always find some other way to honor them at your wedding.

    But, if are trying to spare feelings, just be prepared that if you opt for both to walk you, that it doesn't necessarily mean that nobody can get upset by that. Yes, it seems like the perfect compromise to spare everyone's feelings, but not always.  I really want to have both my dad & mom walk me down the aisle.  I mentioned that idea to my dad and he was completely hurt by it because he's traditional and that is supposed to be his job. Walking his daughter down the aisle is something he's been waiting for and he was really hurt that I would want my mom to intrude into his moment.  I'm still not totally decided on how I will handle that one because I really want them both to do it, but I don't want him upset by it either.

    image 

  • Jen4948Jen4948 Houston member
    10000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    This is a rare instance in weddings where I think that whatever you want is what you should go with.
    Whatever choice you make may well hurt someone's feelings, but don't make your choice on that basis alone.

    That said, do take any hurt feelings into account and be prepared to offer a compromise if it seems appropriate.
  • Thanks all!  I do feel better... I think part of me wants to be traditional but not all traditional aspects really fit me all that well.  Appreciate the input :)
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards