Does this bother anyone else?

Rebl90

Both my FI and I have names that could easily be spelled more than one way, and usually neither one of us minds too much when someone we don't really know gets something wrong, it happens. However, I received a Save the Date from a good friend today (we are both in her wedding), and FI's name was spelled completely wrong. I actually laughed because I couldn't believe it, she's known my FI even longer than I have, and yet she & her FI didn't stop to think how his name was spelled. Personally, I feel like it's lazy, I spent a couple hours facebook-stalking someone of FI's extended family to double-check spellings. 

I didn't say anything to her, hopefully she'll notice when she gets our save the date next week!

Edited: Typo

hlvonb

I might be annoyed for a second but then I would get over it. You yourself even said that it can be spelled more than one way.

Inkdancer

This bothers me so much. I know that my name isn't easy to spell, but FI and I have been together for 7 years. At this point, you should know my name, or at least know how to find out how to spell it!

KeptInStitches

Yeah, it does bug me. I have a first name with multiple spellings and a last name that's easy to mangle, so normally I just roll my eyes and let it go. But on an invitation, it smacks of not even caring.

cupcait927

I have a first and last name that have multiple spellings and I've learned to stop being bothered when it's spelled wrong by a stranger or someone who may have never seen it spelled before. But when someone who's known me for a long time spells it wrong, then I think it's completely rude and disrespectful. I take the time to make sure I'm spelling people's names right, particularly if I have a way of looking it up beforehand because it shows that I care and I respect that person. In the age of the internet, facebook and texting, no one's name really should be spelled wrong on things like invitations and save the dates.

312Emily

This happens to my FI a lot and for one wedding, every piece of paper with it was wrong in some way. He was called Mr. and not Dr. on one, he was called Dr. but his last name was misspelled on another, and on another he was addressed as neither Dr. or the correctly spelled last name. And it was his friend's wedding. We just got a save the date from my friends and everything was correct, so that was really nice.

JCbride2015

Yep, it bothers me.  My last name is easy to spell, but there are a couple of common variations.  The worst is when I spell my name out loud to someone or hand over my driver's license, and they still spell it wrong because they have the other version stuck in their head.  My email is my name too, and I have missed important emails because of this.

We recently got an invitation to a wedding and sure enough, my name was spelled wrong.  Fi and I have been together for 10 years, and the bride and I are Facebook friends.  Take the 30 seconds to check Facebook, seriously.

Lindzxxo

It actually would not bother my one bit. My last name is a little weird and there is more than one variation of my first name PLUS I rarely use my actual last name (usually only for legal purposes). I actually am known by my middle name (which is what I have on FB). Even at work I go by my first and middle name and I'm pretty sure the only one who knows my last name is the person who does checks. So when I get an invite it is usually my first and middle name.

My FI goes by his middle name (his entire family does it for some reason) and a lot of his friends FORGET that he even has a first name (or some think his first name is his middle name).

We are both to the point that it just does NOT even phase us anymore.

IMathlete

My name is slightly difficult to spell. I have an aunt who does wood-burnings as gifts for Christmas occasionally. She ALWAYS misspells my name in her carvings. I have three or four wooden ornaments or small boxes with the wrong name on them. I never say anything and just thank her for the gift, but it really irks me when I first receive them.

tammym1001

FI and I have been together for almost 10 years and we still get mail addressed to:

FI's last name and my first name only

My last name is difficult so they have apparently given up and only address things to me by my first name. In a few months it won't matter anymore so I just got over it.

jenna8984

OP- love the facebook stalking hahaha I did that too, it's the worth the couple minutes to not look like a jackass.

I think what bothers me more is when people ask for the same information 18 times. They ask me through text for my address for the save the date, then 6 months later they ask me for my address for the shower invitation, then 2 months later they ask me for my address for the wedding invitation, then 2 months later ask me for my address for the thank you card, then 2 months later ask me for my address for Christmas cards. This drives me bonkers- write it the F down the first time in a book/ file/ list!!

bethsmiles

That would definitely bother me. It's just lazy to not spell someone's name right.

Rebl90

I'm glad I'm not alone! I just thought it was so lazy since she & her FI have been friends with my FI since they were all in highschool, and we're all FB friends. But, I'm not going  to go out of my way to point it out, it doesn't offend me deeply or anything like that.

elBecko said:

I have a last name that is pretty long and difficult to spell, and I usually don't care how badly people mangle its spelling. However, if it's on an invitation or other correspondence, it does irritate me. When I was MOH in my best friend's wedding, she spelled it wrong, and that really bothered me because it seemed so thoughtless.  

I also got a STD this summer addressed to "FI's Name and Lizzie". My name is not Lizzie.  It's not even Elizabeth. When FI asked the couple about it, they said they just forgot my actual name and thought maybe it was Lizzie. We'd been dating for almost 5 years at that point, and he was a groomsman in this wedding, so you think they would have tried a little harder. At least they could have taken 30 seconds to check it on facebook. 

What did your FI say to them?? I can't believe someone totally took a guess on your name, it made me laugh so hard when I read that!  

If I don't know someone's first or last name I just ask their significant other/friend how to spell it, so far that hasn't come back to bite me yet

HaileyDancingbear

Are you, your FI, and the good friend all on facebook?  Because if you are then all it would have taken to get the correct spelling would be to hop on Facebook for like five seconds.  I can see why you're bothered, because that does show a bit of laziness, but I'd probably just find it funny if it happened to me.

And I get the frustration on the multiple spellings.  Hailey sounds short and easy to spell, but no, there has to be like ten ways to spell it so I always have to spell it out.  

HisGirlFriday13

My maiden name had an unusual spelling and it DROVE ME NUTS when people couldn't spell it correctly. 

Look, if you just met me, fine, I get that you don't know how to spell it. But if we're FB friends, and you're inviting me to something, you'd damn well better spell my name correctly.

I used to be a print journalist, and people would spell my name wrong IN E-MAILS to me. I always looked at that and thought, "DUDE, you just typed my name -- or at least clicked on the e-mail address on my byline -- and SAW IT WRITTEN OUT. How did you then eff it up?"

Rebl90

HaileyDancingbear said:

Are you, your FI, and the good friend all on facebook?  Because if you are then all it would have taken to get the correct spelling would be to hop on Facebook for like five seconds.  I can see why you're bothered, because that does show a bit of laziness, but I'd probably just find it funny if it happened to me.

And I get the frustration on the multiple spellings.  Hailey sounds short and easy to spell, but no, there has to be like ten ways to spell it so I always have to spell it out.  

Rebl90 said:

I'm glad I'm not alone! I just thought it was so lazy since she & her FI have been friends with my FI since they were all in highschool, and we're all FB friends. But, I'm not going  to go out of my way to point it out, it doesn't offend me deeply or anything like that.

*STUCK*

Yeah, there's no excuse.  If people are in your wedding then you need to know how they spell their name.  Heck, she even RSVP'd to a surprise party I'm hosting for my FI this week, and the invite had his name on it. 

Rebl90

HisGirlFriday13 said:

My maiden name had an unusual spelling and it DROVE ME NUTS when people couldn't spell it correctly. 

Look, if you just met me, fine, I get that you don't know how to spell it. But if we're FB friends, and you're inviting me to something, you'd damn well better spell my name correctly.

I used to be a print journalist, and people would spell my name wrong IN E-MAILS to me. I always looked at that and thought, "DUDE, you just typed my name -- or at least clicked on the e-mail address on my byline -- and SAW IT WRITTEN OUT. How did you then eff it up?"

I will never understand people who don't take the time to double check spellings in professional settings.

HisGirlFriday13

Rebl90 said:

HisGirlFriday13 said:

My maiden name had an unusual spelling and it DROVE ME NUTS when people couldn't spell it correctly. 

Look, if you just met me, fine, I get that you don't know how to spell it. But if we're FB friends, and you're inviting me to something, you'd damn well better spell my name correctly.

I used to be a print journalist, and people would spell my name wrong IN E-MAILS to me. I always looked at that and thought, "DUDE, you just typed my name -- or at least clicked on the e-mail address on my byline -- and SAW IT WRITTEN OUT. How did you then eff it up?"

I will never understand people who don't take the time to double check spellings in professional settings.

I always assumed it was their way of telling me I didn't have to take them seriously. Like, if you can't spell my name correctly, then CLEARLY you don't mean for me to pay attention to you, right?

doeydo

My name can be spelled multiple ways and people rarely get it right but I'm used to it.  My FI's name is spelled differently than the way the name is traditionally spelled; so he is used to it as well.  However, with people that are tech savvy, I just don't understand why they don't take 5 seconds to look it up on facebook.  It's just stupid, IMO.

Rebl90

elBecko said:

Rebl90 said:

I'm glad I'm not alone! I just thought it was so lazy since she & her FI have been friends with my FI since they were all in highschool, and we're all FB friends. But, I'm not going  to go out of my way to point it out, it doesn't offend me deeply or anything like that.

elBecko said:

I have a last name that is pretty long and difficult to spell, and I usually don't care how badly people mangle its spelling. However, if it's on an invitation or other correspondence, it does irritate me. When I was MOH in my best friend's wedding, she spelled it wrong, and that really bothered me because it seemed so thoughtless.  

I also got a STD this summer addressed to "FI's Name and Lizzie". My name is not Lizzie.  It's not even Elizabeth. When FI asked the couple about it, they said they just forgot my actual name and thought maybe it was Lizzie. We'd been dating for almost 5 years at that point, and he was a groomsman in this wedding, so you think they would have tried a little harder. At least they could have taken 30 seconds to check it on facebook. 

What did your FI say to them?? I can't believe someone totally took a guess on your name, it made me laugh so hard when I read that!  

If I don't know someone's first or last name I just ask their significant other/friend how to spell it, so far that hasn't come back to bite me yet

He played it off as a joke "Who's Lizzie? Do I have a new girlfriend I don't know about? Is she hot?". The bride just laughed it off and blamed it on pre-wedding stress (and never apologized).  Because that's obviously a valid excuse. 

Oh that's right, I forgot being a bride gives me (and my fellow brides) to be lazy and not care about other people's feelings! 

Rebl90

elBecko said:

Rebl90 said:

elBecko said:

Rebl90 said:

I'm glad I'm not alone! I just thought it was so lazy since she & her FI have been friends with my FI since they were all in highschool, and we're all FB friends. But, I'm not going  to go out of my way to point it out, it doesn't offend me deeply or anything like that.

elBecko said:

I have a last name that is pretty long and difficult to spell, and I usually don't care how badly people mangle its spelling. However, if it's on an invitation or other correspondence, it does irritate me. When I was MOH in my best friend's wedding, she spelled it wrong, and that really bothered me because it seemed so thoughtless.  

I also got a STD this summer addressed to "FI's Name and Lizzie". My name is not Lizzie.  It's not even Elizabeth. When FI asked the couple about it, they said they just forgot my actual name and thought maybe it was Lizzie. We'd been dating for almost 5 years at that point, and he was a groomsman in this wedding, so you think they would have tried a little harder. At least they could have taken 30 seconds to check it on facebook. 

What did your FI say to them?? I can't believe someone totally took a guess on your name, it made me laugh so hard when I read that!  

If I don't know someone's first or last name I just ask their significant other/friend how to spell it, so far that hasn't come back to bite me yet

He played it off as a joke "Who's Lizzie? Do I have a new girlfriend I don't know about? Is she hot?". The bride just laughed it off and blamed it on pre-wedding stress (and never apologized).  Because that's obviously a valid excuse. 

Oh that's right, I forgot being a bride gives me (and my fellow brides) to be lazy and not care about other people's feelings! 

Yeah, let's hope I'm not "too stressed" when I address her invitation, otherwise I might misspell Sara as Bitchface, just to make a point. 

Kidding, I promise. 

oh puhleeeeese do this!!! You would be my hero for life!

lol, I understand if you don't do it though

afox007

It doesn't bother me anymore. Both my first and last name seem to be a source of spelling chaos. My step grandma has been around since I was 4 and still spells my last name wrong, I didn't notice until I got a Christmas card and started going back through old cards and saw she's spelt it wrong for years!

jdluvr06

It used to bother me but not anymore. I laugh at it now.

CaliMel11

We went to a friends wedding, and granted we were extremely last minute adds. But they totally spelled his name wrong, and then they messed up my last name. We had a good laugh over what our names turned into.
It doesn't really bother me since it can be difficult to remember how to spell names. Apparently I am the only person who isn't related to my friend who can spell her name correctly. I've even seen people spell it wrong on facebook....despite you know, her name being right there.

erinbethp

I get this! I have a difficult French last name and it's always spelled wrong, even when I tell them how to spell it. It's not hard nowadays to find out people's names on facebook. I did this when looking up names of some of my friends' partners as I didn't know their last names. I also figured if I couldn't find them, ask! Not sure about the etiquette rules on this but most people don't mind and appreciate that you have made the effort. I did this and my friends just laughed and were happy to give me the names/correct spellings. 

I went to a wedding two summers ago with my FH (then boyfriend) for a really good friend of mine. The groom and I have known each other our whole lives and I worked with the bride for a few years so knew her well too and had her on facebook. The seating chart had "FH from Britain" on it, as no one bothered to find out his last name. It was funny but a bit annoying as it would have been so easy and taken no time to find it out. Not really a huge deal to us at the end of the day. 

Chipmunk415

I'm having the opposite problem. I very carefully found out how to spell the names of SOs of some of my guests to put on the invite. The RSVP cards are coming back "Mr/Ms. SoandSo and guest." Grrrr....now I gotta bug them to confirm the guest's name, so I can write out the place cards...

Inkdancer

Chipmunk415 said:

I'm having the opposite problem. I very carefully found out how to spell the names of SOs of some of my guests to put on the invite. The RSVP cards are coming back "Mr/Ms. SoandSo and guest." Grrrr....now I gotta bug them to confirm the guest's name, so I can write out the place cards...

How strange!

vt&dt

It would bother me, too.  In fact, when we booked our honeymoon - all of our names were spelled wrong on the contract.  The S's in my name were replaced with Z'z.  It was quite awful looking.

We (really, I) just finished hand-addressing envelopes for invites, and FI and I made sure we spelled everyone's name correctly.  Sure, he felt a little funny emailing or texting his friends and asking "Does your wife, Sarah, spell her name with or without the 'h'?" - but I think everyone feels much better when they're invited, by their correctly spelled name.

afaber24

That happends to me constantly! My first name is Ann (no e) and people constantly spell it Anne. 

People are just amazingly lazy! A relative wrote on my facebook wall for my birthday "Happy Birthday Anne". I was like, seriously?? Its on the top of the page when you're writing that!

thisismynickname2

A lot of my friends go by First Name Middle Name on Facebook for privacy reasons, so I did have to text my best friend to get the correct spelling of her boyfriend's last name. I truly just forgot. I also have asked FI to get "proper" names of his friends (John/Jonathan/Jon? Is Jerry short for anything?) but he hasn't gotten them back to me yet, oh well. No rush!

My last name's a beast. I don't care when people spell it wrong because people can barely pronounce it, much less spell it. However, I hold a conflict-resolution kind of job and I get really irritated when people accuse me of not getting back to them on e-mail. When they talk to someone else and forward them what they allegedly sent me, my e-mail address is always butchered. You can't just magically find me, you have to ask someone to contact me- so why the heck didn't you listen when they provided my address?

Rebl90

afaber24 said:

That happends to me constantly! My first name is Ann (no e) and people constantly spell it Anne. 

People are just amazingly lazy! A relative wrote on my facebook wall for my birthday "Happy Birthday Anne". I was like, seriously?? Its on the top of the page when you're writing that!

*STUCK*

Okay, that is seriously lazy!