So right after I got engaged (2010), I asked a friend of mine if she would sing, mostly because I had another friend asking if she could sing (she wanted to sing because she wasn't going to be a bridesmaid, which she ended up being anyway). I told her then that I just wanted her to sing for the unity candle and gave her a specific song. She just sent me a list of options for her to sing for the rest of the ceremony. We already have our music picked out with our DJ for the ceremony. Is the a tasteful way to say "Thanks, but no thanks?"