I had a friend from college and his now fiance attend my wedding two years back in the San Francisco area. They live locally in the SF area while my husband and I came back to the area from New York to celebrate our wedding. I enjoyed having them come to my wedding. They left kind of early but it was still nice to see them. They did not bring us a wedding gift. Now the tables have turned. They have invited my husband and I to their wedding, which will take place in Los Angeles area. After trying to figure out logistics, we've decided we cannot attend the wedding. This will be my first wedding that I've declined from the East Coast. I feel bad about not going but the expense and the fact that we have an infant son to take care of makes it impossible. If you were in my situation, would you still give a gift knowing that they never gave one to you when they came to your wedding? Being that my friend is a guy, I don't know if it's just something he didn't think about at my wedding. He doesn't seem to be bothered that I'm not attending. What is the appropriate thing to do?