Bridal party proposal ideas

Ashamoieal

Okay so my fiancé and I came up with a great way to ask our bridal party to be apart of our special day. We are going to work with our videographer to put together a DVD that we can mail to each one of them of us asking them to be in our wedding. But we need some ideas on what to do in the video... Should we read a poem, or make it funny...?? Please help! Thanks!!

pinkshorts27

So similar to this ladies, the girls I want to have in my BP are all in different states. Two already know I'm going to ask them. I thought I would write a letter to each girl telling them why I appreciate them in my life and then asking them to be in my wedding while explaining that if they can't for some reason I understand.  Would that be too much pressure? I won't see them until summer and want to ask them before then. 

KeptInStitches

I know you're not going to like this opinion, but I feel like this would put a lot of pressure on people to say yes when they may not really be able to. Your friends / family may have stuff going on that prevents them from even getting the outfit and showing up (long-standing vacation plans, pregnancy, financial difficulties, etc.). I would keep to something simpler, like calling them and asking, or if they're local, taking them out for coffee or something similar.

OliveOilsMom

Ashamoieal said:

Okay so my fiancé and I came up with a great way to ask our bridal party to be apart of our special day. We are going to work with our videographer to put together a DVD that we can mail to each one of them of us asking them to be in our wedding. But we need some ideas on what to do in the video... Should we read a poem, or make it funny...?? Please help! Thanks!!

The wedding industry wants you to spend lots of money on your wedding.  This is just one way of them getting you to spend money for your wedding.  Asking WP members in extravegant ways didn't become a "thing" until recently.  I had my BMs over for lunch and I asked them there.  I did give each BM a small gift, a candle, but I didn't spend a lot of money on them.  For each wedding I've been in the bride asked me face to face and I was just as happy!  I just don't know what I would do with that DVD after you asked me.  I'd probably keep it for the duration of the wedding planning, but would probably trash it after the wedding itself.  I know this isn't what you wanted to hear, but just go simple.  Like PP said, take them out for coffee and ask them there.

climbingsingle

I'm really not a fan of this. Just ask them in person and if you can't do that, do it over the phone. It doesn't need to be some over-the-top production. 

Jen4948

Just ask them directly.  You're asking them to do you a very big personal favor, so be dignified and serious about it-don't act like they won the Publishers Clearinghouse Sweepstakes. No poems, videos, or gifts.  

And accept with dignity hat someone still might have to say no.

ei34

I'd go with funny over a poem if you're set on doing a video.  Something light and casual, so no one you're asking feels pressured.  Personally, though, I wouldn't go with a video at all.  I asked my two sisters and my best friend in person, and it went very well.  A video seems like too much hoopla.

AddieCake

You should just ask them and not try to be clever.

Ashamoieal

First of all let me clear up a few things... Money and cost of this idea is not an issue for me at all. And everyone that I'm asking would be more than honored to stand in my wedding. I didn't ask for you to try to change my mind. I asked for ideas of what to say in the video... And clearly i want to do something more fun and creative rather than call someone like half of you cheap brides did. Oh and p. s. I don't care if what they do with the DVD after they watch it. So thanks for nothing... You are all rude and so unhelpful

Ashamoieal

That idea sounds super cute... You can personalize the card as well... Look on Pinterest and etsy for great ideas!

Viczaesar

Ashamoieal said:

First of all let me clear up a few things... Money and cost of this idea is not an issue for me at all. And everyone that I'm asking would be more than honored to stand in my wedding. I didn't ask for you to try to change my mind. I asked for ideas of what to say in the video... And clearly i want to do something more fun and creative rather than call someone like half of you cheap brides did. Oh and p. s. I don't care if what they do with the DVD after they watch it. So thanks for nothing... You are all rude and so unhelpful

You call us cheap and then say that we're the rude ones?  You have a smudge, Pot.

KeptInStitches

@blueeyes90, I wouldn't find a heartfelt letter to be too much pressure.

artbyallie

Ashamoieal said:

First of all let me clear up a few things... Money and cost of this idea is not an issue for me at all. And everyone that I'm asking would be more than honored to stand in my wedding. I didn't ask for you to try to change my mind. I asked for ideas of what to say in the video... And clearly i want to do something more fun and creative rather than call someone like half of you cheap brides did. Oh and p. s. I don't care if what they do with the DVD after they watch it. So thanks for nothing... You are all rude and so unhelpful

This post only reinforces my initial thought from your OP that you're going to be a very demanding and not fun bride. If I got a DVD proposal asking me to be a bridesmaid I would run for the hills so fast.

KatWAG

Ashamoieal said:

First of all let me clear up a few things... Money and cost of this idea is not an issue for me at all. And everyone that I'm asking would be more than honored to stand in my wedding. I didn't ask for you to try to change my mind. I asked for ideas of what to say in the video... And clearly i want to do something more fun and creative rather than call someone like half of you cheap brides did. Oh and p. s. I don't care if what they do with the DVD after they watch it. So thanks for nothing... You are all rude and so unhelpful

@ashamoieal I had a luxury wedding. And I still think it's a bad idea. I would have a good laugh at your expense if you sent my a DVD of you reading a poem 

The most "creative" I would get is giving them a ring pop and asking them in person.

pinkshorts27

KeptInStitches Thanks. I just wanted to make sure.  I wouldn't want to offend or pressure anyone, but I want them to know how much they have meant to me and how much better my life is because  they are in it. 

manateehugger

@blueeyes90, meh I did that too. I bought cute cards and wrote them a little note. I didn't see how that was a whole lot more over the top than a phone call (which would also be hard to turn down). 

I didn't make them overly mushy though, just said stuff like, "I'd love to have you up there with me."

I do think the productions or bridesmaid boxes are massively overdone and pinterest silliness. I always think that people are better off saving their money for a badass bridesmaid gift - or even better, covering the BP's dress or traveling expenses. 

Jen4948

Ashamoieal said:

First of all let me clear up a few things... Money and cost of this idea is not an issue for me at all. And everyone that I'm asking would be more than honored to stand in my wedding. I didn't ask for you to try to change my mind. I asked for ideas of what to say in the video... And clearly i want to do something more fun and creative rather than call someone like half of you cheap brides did. Oh and p. s. I don't care if what they do with the DVD after they watch it. So thanks for nothing... You are all rude and so unhelpful

How do you know this?  If you know it from asking them directly, why didn't you just ask them straight out?

And nobody was rude in letting you know that we don't think this is a good idea.

One other thing: If you plan to keep posting on the Internet, lose the "I didn't ask for" crap.  It doesn't matter whether you asked or not.  By the act of posting, you asked for our opinions-regardless of whether or not they answer the actual question.  Oh, and by the way, that happens in real life too.  You are not entitled to control, here or anywhere else, how people answer questions, let alone follow up with "I didn't ask you."  That makes you come off as very childish and pouty.  Grow up.