Need to vent UPDATE

AlexisA01

Okay so on 12/12/12 two of my former high school friends got engaged. They have been together for a long time and it was coming.It was a wonderful surprise for her and her other friends and family were all in attendance. Jump to this passed weekend, she was hosting a scentsy party and was bragging about how she wants her fiance to propose again but this time on her terms. She already announced that they got engaged on all her social media, week later. So I don't understand why the need for her to ask him to get engaged again on her terms.  What does that mean?

She called it off on Facebook. Said something about finding herself.

climbingsingle

WTH? That's weird. And also hurtful and rude to her FI. 

Cookie Pusher

I know someone who choreographed her entire proposal, down to hiring people to video and photograph the whole thing, because she wanted it to be exactly how she "envisioned" it. Some girls totally lose sight of what the proposal means.

HisGirlFriday13

12/12/12? As in, 13 months ago?

Dude, if she wants to plan something, how about a wedding??

jdluvr06

Seriously?

kmmssg

I have a hunch her wedding planning is going to be a disaster if she is choreographing a do over proposal.

cmiles89

*Sniff sniff* What is that smell... oh... I think I caught a wiff of a PPD coming down the line after her actual wedding (whenever she decides to do that rather than a Pretty Princess Engagement, heretofore known as PPE).

AlexisA01

She pressured the guy into marrying him for like three years. I recommended the knot to her so she can get help with her wedding stuff. Yeah she got engaged on that date but it's not special enough. She really wants to be engaged again on her terms. What ever she meant by that I don't know.

Chipmunk415

Hopefully the groom, after hearing she wants a "redo" on her terms, realizes what is likely to come and runs.

FI asked over dinner we cooked together. I was in yoga pants, tshirt, and kinda sweaty. Didn't even get on one knee. Never needed a redo, as the IMPORTANT part was the fact that he'd asked me to spend the rest of my life with him and I said yes.

minskat30

That really sucks to be her FI.  My H would be seriously hurt if I asked for a do-over on something he spent time and energy making a memory for me. 

Bubblegum5586

Wow! I hope you aren't one of her BMs I can only imagine what that will be like....

CLI242009

To OP I believe what she means is this:



Basically how SHE thinks she should be proposed to. Whatever she thought up. Like if he proposed while they were out walking at a park or something, she might of envisioned it in a restaurant next to candlelight or on a beach on a nice summer night. >.>

To Cookie Pusher - Yes I agree. A lot of girls totally miss the point of a proposal. I see it more as girls seeing it as an AW moment rather than a special important moment in your life. (not saying THE most important just an important one, IMO)

To HisGirl - LMAO @ your comment. That made me snicker. Thanks!

abbyj700

Chipmunk415 said:

Hopefully the groom, after hearing she wants a "redo" on her terms, realizes what is likely to come and runs.

FI asked over dinner we cooked together. I was in yoga pants, tshirt, and kinda sweaty. Didn't even get on one knee. Never needed a redo, as the IMPORTANT part was the fact that he'd asked me to spend the rest of my life with him and I said yes.

EXACTLY the point of a proposal. So many people seem to lose the fact that this person just made the decision that they want to spend the rest of their life with you and got the nerve up to put themselves out there and ask. 

cupcait927

FI would be hella pissed and hurt if I ever dared to ask for a redo. He was so nervous the whole afternoon leading up to it and put a lot of thought into the way he asked me. It was just as much his moment as it was mine. It was very sweet and very "us". The OP's friend is just delusional and obviously doesn't care as much about her FI as she does having a Pinterest-perfect proposal.

AlexisA01

CLI242009 said:

To OP I believe what she means is this:



Basically how SHE thinks she should be proposed to. Whatever she thought up. Like if he proposed while they were out walking at a park or something, she might of envisioned it in a restaurant next to candlelight or on a beach on a nice summer night. >.>

To Cookie Pusher - Yes I agree. A lot of girls totally miss the point of a proposal. I see it more as girls seeing it as an AW moment rather than a special important moment in your life. (not saying THE most important just an important one, IMO)

To HisGirl - LMAO @ your comment. That made me snicker. Thanks!

Too bad we as in her friends and family, capture the moment at the fancy restaurant. Juan asked her mom for permission. She even chose the restaurant, how she wanted to be engaged, a special date...what else can she have on her terms!? This girl invited me and my former roommate to her engagement parties but closed off the wedding to just "special" close friends and family. She REALLY needs the KNOT.

CLI242009

AlexisA01 said:

To OP I believe what she means is this:



Basically how SHE thinks she should be proposed to. Whatever she thought up. Like if he proposed while they were out walking at a park or something, she might of envisioned it in a restaurant next to candlelight or on a beach on a nice summer night. >.>

To Cookie Pusher - Yes I agree. A lot of girls totally miss the point of a proposal. I see it more as girls seeing it as an AW moment rather than a special important moment in your life. (not saying THE most important just an important one, IMO)

To HisGirl - LMAO @ your comment. That made me snicker. Thanks!

Too bad we as in her friends and family, capture the moment at the fancy restaurant. Juan asked her mom for permission. She even chose the restaurant, how she wanted to be engaged, a special date...what else can she have on her terms!? This girl invited me and my former roommate to her engagement parties but closed off the wedding to just "special" close friends and family. She REALLY needs the KNOT.

Wow...just wow....I'm so sorry you know someone like this. =(

wajohnson09

AlexisA01 said:

CLI242009 said:

To OP I believe what she means is this:



Basically how SHE thinks she should be proposed to. Whatever she thought up. Like if he proposed while they were out walking at a park or something, she might of envisioned it in a restaurant next to candlelight or on a beach on a nice summer night. >.>

To Cookie Pusher - Yes I agree. A lot of girls totally miss the point of a proposal. I see it more as girls seeing it as an AW moment rather than a special important moment in your life. (not saying THE most important just an important one, IMO)

To HisGirl - LMAO @ your comment. That made me snicker. Thanks!

Too bad we as in her friends and family, capture the moment at the fancy restaurant. Juan asked her mom for permission. She even chose the restaurant, how she wanted to be engaged, a special date...what else can she have on her terms!? This girl invited me and my former roommate to her engagement parties but closed off the wedding to just "special" close friends and family. She REALLY needs the KNOT.

She really needs a swift kick in the rear end!!!

Is she expecting another ring too? Or is that fine and it's just the whole "hey I want to spend the rest of my life with you" that's the problem?

Had she started planning the wedding yet?

JCbride2015

wajohnson09 said:

To OP I believe what she means is this:



Basically how SHE thinks she should be proposed to. Whatever she thought up. Like if he proposed while they were out walking at a park or something, she might of envisioned it in a restaurant next to candlelight or on a beach on a nice summer night. >.>

To Cookie Pusher - Yes I agree. A lot of girls totally miss the point of a proposal. I see it more as girls seeing it as an AW moment rather than a special important moment in your life. (not saying THE most important just an important one, IMO)

To HisGirl - LMAO @ your comment. That made me snicker. Thanks!

Too bad we as in her friends and family, capture the moment at the fancy restaurant. Juan asked her mom for permission. She even chose the restaurant, how she wanted to be engaged, a special date...what else can she have on her terms!? This girl invited me and my former roommate to her engagement parties but closed off the wedding to just "special" close friends and family. She REALLY needs the KNOT.

She really needs a swift kick in the rear end!!! Is she expecting another ring too? Or is that fine and it's just the whole "hey I want to spend the rest of my life with you" that's the problem? Had she started planning the wedding yet?

Engagement partieS plural?  And then no invite to the wedding?

AlexisA01

@wajohnson09 She is in the planning process @JCBride2014 She had three. STD have already been out for a few months.

JCbride2015

AlexisA01 said:

@wajohnson09 She is in the planning process @JCBride2014 She had three. STD have already been out for a few months.

AlexisA01

AlexisA01 said:

@wajohnson09 She is in the planning process @JCBride2014 She had three. STD have already been out for a few months.

Stuck in the box.She broke up with him on facebook last night. She sais she wanted to find hertrue potential. Poor guy she badgered him into proposing.

HaileyDancingbear

AlexisA01 said:

AlexisA01 said:

@wajohnson09 She is in the planning process @JCBride2014 She had three. STD have already been out for a few months.

Stuck in the box.She broke up with him on facebook last night. She sais she wanted to find hertrue potential. Poor guy she badgered him into proposing.

I'm sure he'll be hurt for a little while but it really sounds like he dodged a bullet there.  Not all breakups are a bad thing, and maybe now he'll find someone who appreciates him and doesn't push him around.  

princessleia22

AlexisA01 said:

AlexisA01 said:

@wajohnson09 She is in the planning process @JCBride2014 She had three. STD have already been out for a few months.

Stuck in the box.She broke up with him on facebook last night. She sais she wanted to find hertrue potential. Poor guy she badgered him into proposing.

She may have just saved the poor guy from a lifetime of horror and drama. But, even with the little you have said, why does it not surprise me that she broke up with him on Facebook? 

But, if she were to get another proposal, would she also feel entitled to another 3 engagement parties?

Yeah, she definitely sounds like a piece of work. Some people need major help.

I got proposed to in a parking lot.  He didn't get down on one knee.  He didn't even actually say "will you marry me?".  He pulled out a ring, which was safety pinned into his wallet (so he didn't lose it) and he couldn't get it undone, so he just opened up his wallet with the ring pinned inside, said "do you see that?... so, um, will you?".  Later that day I was thinking about it, and how he didn't "actually" ask me to "marry him", so I gave him a really hard time about that, saying that I thought he was just asking me to help get the ring out of his wallet or if I wanted to just wear it, not that it actually meant we were getting married.  And if he wanted to get married, he should have been more clear about that.  And since, he didn't actually ask me to marry him, that ring doesn't count as an e-ring and he needs to get me another one and ask properly.  So, I had a lot of fun teasing him about proposing without actually proposing.  But, he knew I was joking and I never would have let him redo the proposal.

Do I get a do over proposal? I didn't get any big, romantic ordeal. Honestly, I wouldn't want a do over anyway.  I think my proposal suits us just fine... and creates a non-typical story. He did actually ask my dad for his blessing first, which was awesome (and my dad was kind enough to tell him that he trusts my decisions, so if I said yes then he supports my choice... my dad didn't really like FI much at the time, so I wouldn't have been surprised if he got shot down).  And he did it while we were with my family for Christmas, so they were there, although he pulled me aside so he didn't do it right in front of them, but I got to share the exciting moment with them right away.

sarahufl

I was visiting my parents and FI showed up unannounced and rang the doorbell in the middle of the afternoon. He flew from NY to FL on a whim and when I opened the door, he had a ring in his hand. I was holding my parent's dog and was wearing sweat pants.

Would that be "pinterest approved"? Probably not. Was it awesome and perfect? Absolutely.

pinkcow13

While I think our story is pretty romantic and sweet, the details are nowhere near perfect. My nails were not even done, they were all chipped and funky, it was a humid drizzly day, so my hair was frizzy and big, and I was slightly buzzed since we had gone out to the bar beforehand. I was in an old college sweatshirt and jeans - and to me it was perfect. There is no way I would ever make FI propose again, I loved my proposal just the way it was. This girl needs a reality check - and she broke up with him on facebook?! Who the hell, over the age of 16,does that?! I must say he dodged QUITE the bullet there.

MollyandD

That's sad for the guy. I didn't even have a real proposal, but I'm not asking for a redo. My sweetie and I had talked about getting engaged and while we were at the mall, he said, "Hey, there's Helzberg. Wanna look at rings?"

There was the only proposal I got, and I am perfectly content. But I got to pick out my ring myself, so that was pretty cool.

Cheetah2B

Holy shit Batman. He definitely dodged that bullet. OR, she's hoping he will beg her back and "do it right". Which makes her a bitch, and him a patsy :-(

I proposed to fh right before some candlelit nookie. Yes, I did it first...lol-He proposed on Christmas morning at 2/3 AM, while we were getting into bed. With a ring pop. Yup Yup! Loved it BC we're childish and corny like that.