help! opinions needed!

lavenderfields13

I'm supposed to go look at a venue tomorrow. Over the weekend I found somewhere online that states it actually holds 150 for reception, 200 for cocktail. We're inviting around 185. So I planned on cancelling my tour but emailed the venue to confirm the capacity was correct. It was a Saturday night so I knew they probably wouldn't get back to me right away. So I started looking at other venues. Found one, made an appt for it in the time slot the other was supposed to be. As soon as I did that venue #1 emails me and says no we can hold 200. I feel like this is the one I want more. But then i find out ceremony area (we will be having a quick ceremony) only seats about 120, rest have to stand. I know everyone will not RSVP yes and some willl be late for the ceremony but I think still a lot would be there and be standing. This is not OK right? FI says to cancel the tour and go view the other place. Do I give up on the venue because of ceremony seating? The other place books FAST so that's why if we want to see it we need to do it soon and tomorrow is the only day FI and I can go view together this week. We work opposite schedules.

Sorry for this long rambling post!

Hummingbird125

If there is not going to be guaranteed seating for both the ceremony and the reception, I think you should forget that venue.

lavenderfields13

that's what i'm thinking. my mom and aunt are telling me it's not a big deal.

ShallowSeas

If there will be people standing, I say nix that place. I know its not your intentions but its rude to expect guests to stand to watch you get married.  I would focus on places that can definitely hold enough people. Although not everyone you invite will come, I would still plan like they all will. When I looked for a venue, I was looking for one that would hold everyone I was inviting and just assumed for that purpose that everyone would come. Realistically I know that's not happening, but I would rather have extra space in a venue than not enough.

phira

I had to stand at the last wedding I went to. It really made the ceremony a lot less enjoyable. Consider the fact that a lot of your guests are not going to be wearing their most comfortable shoes, you're not really going to know which guests who end up standing really should be sitting,* and not to be all, "IT'S YOUR DAY!!" but standing guests are going to be less, "Oh my goodness, my heart is leaping with joy because this ceremony is so wonderful!" and more, "Ugh, will they please stop talking, I want to go sit down."

* Examples: my fit-looking friend actually has a major hip injury that her job aggravates. She looks like she could stand for 20-30 minutes, but she's in pain the whole time. At the wedding I mentioned above, my partner had the flu** and could barely stand, but he had to for the ceremony.

** No, he shouldn't have been there. Yes, he should have stayed home. It was a messssss.

Peaseblossom55

If you can't seat everyone you plan to invite for the ceremony or the reception I would say skip it too.

Blue & White

Yea, there has to be enough seating at both the ceremony and reception locations.  The ceremony IS the most important part of your wedding, technically, since it's what makes it a wedding.  It's hard to forget that in the craziness of booking a DJ, picking out food, seating charts, escort cards, centerpieces, flowers, etc.

I think you should look at your 2nd venue OR cut your guest list (it would be tough, but you could possibly do it...then again, my guest list I thought was about 120 and now it's 165...sooo yea)

minskat30

Yup, you know and your FI know what is right.  No one wants to stand during a ceremony.  You should only pick venues that fit everyone seated.

Dignity100

I agree - skip it!  I had to stand at a wedding before, it was outdoor and of course I was in heels so I was sinking into the ground, it wasn't the greatest experience!!

lavenderfields13

that's what i was thinking i just needed to hear it from other people. we crossed it off the list. thanks for the input everyone!