It makes me really sad that I am having to ask for advice on this. It is a short story, so I am hoping to turn this around before it becomes a horrible problem. I have been with my FI forever, and we have always had a loving, great relationship with his parents. I love his older sister, too!
We have been engaged for a few weeks now. Twice we have sat down and tried to talk wedding stuff, for example, dates/possible invite list/ideas, and it has gone beyond terrible. Twice now my FI has left the hang out furious, and myself in tears the whole way home. All the sudden, she is being rude and fighting us on everything we say. She is being very aggressive and rolling her eyes, making rude comments, and just overall having a problem with everything. For example, She even accused me of lying to her and saying that I told her we were getting married in 2016, which is laughable because I have never once said the words, "2016" in my life. My FI AND my FFIL both told her ( because they were there) that I did not say that. It is a simple misunderstanding, but she is was being crazy and accusing me to my face of lying about the year, then when I said I did not say that, she went back in forth with me like it was a grade school fight. It got the the point where I just quick talking. This is just one example of several.
My FI and I cannot figure out what changed or what is going on?? We have never had issues with her or anyone in their family, not even once. We are shocked and very hurt that she is just trying to create all this drama for zero reason at all. Just because I know people will ask, they are not paying for anything for the wedding. They didn't volunteer, so that is fine. We were just talking to her about decisions we made and ideas just because we want her to be involved because we thought it would be fun. We now realize that she cannot be involved or she will ruin this for everyone. This isn't what we wanted but how do we turn this around?? I feel like there is nothing we can do.
My FI told me today he thinks she is 'jealous'? I don't really understand why or how? Any thoughts? We just have no idea what changed? My FI is 30 and his older sister has her own family, so he isn't the first one 'moving on' in life. Also, we have lived together for years, so us getting engaged/married did not actually change anything at all. We are just shocked because we cannot figure out where all this drama is coming from and we NEVER thought this was going to be how this was going to go with her. I hope it changes back ASAP, but it is out of my control. She seemed over the moon when we got engaged, then that quickly changed. We do not like drama or confrontation, LOL. I would appreciate any thoughts, similar situations, or suggestions. Thank you!