@PrettyGirlLost If you were honestly a bride like this...I would have to poke you in the eyeball with my cocktail straw from my drink, that I paid for at your cash bar of course!
How can you be sure I am not? Mwahahahaha!
"Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."
Guys - I need help find a super cutesy phrase to put on my craptastic monogrammed favors that no one will take because they just WON'T be special enough without a cute phrase! Oh and can someone help me come up with a unique role for my friend that I can't bear to have in the bridal party becasue she'll just RUIN the photos? I mean, honorary bridesmaid is totally a thing, right?
Guys - I need help find a super cutesy phrase to put on my craptastic monogrammed favors that no one will take because they just WON'T be special enough without a cute phrase! Oh and can someone help me come up with a unique role for my friend that I can't bear to have in the bridal party becasue she'll just RUIN the photos? I mean, honorary bridesmaid is totally a thing, right?
I think you need a personal attendant. Make that bitch run around like a fool and do stupid, inane tasks for you, but then don't thank her and don't give her a gift like you give the rest of your BMs.
"Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."
Hey guys, how do I tell my MOH that she is totally fat and hideous looking and she needs to drop, like, 100 lbs RIGHTNOW or I'll have to kick her out of the WP?
Hey guys, how do I tell my MOH that she is totally fat and hideous looking and she needs to drop, like, 100 lbs RIGHTNOW or I'll have to kick her out of the WP?
"Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."
So asking one of the GM to get a nose job before the wedding is totally okay, right? Cuz he's got a big ol' beak, and there is no way I'm letting that thing mucking up my speshul pictures!
Also, I've never been to Hawaii so you bitches better take me there for my bachelorette weekend, even though you're paying for your own wedding 5 months later and I'll too broke to bring you to Chuck E Cheese for yours. K- THX!!
Guys - I need help find a super cutesy phrase to put on my craptastic monogrammed favors that no one will take because they just WON'T be special enough without a cute phrase! Oh and can someone help me come up with a unique role for my friend that I can't bear to have in the bridal party becasue she'll just RUIN the photos? I mean, honorary bridesmaid is totally a thing, right?
I think you need a personal attendant. Make that bitch run around like a fool and do stupid, inane tasks for you, but then don't thank her and don't give her a gift like you give the rest of your BMs.
Well obviously she wouldn't get a gift! And the only gift my BMs are getting is jewelry that they must wear for the ceremony but it's totes adorbs enough that they can wear it all the time after my wedding and remember MY special day forever!
So asking one of the GM to get a nose job before the wedding is totally okay, right? Cuz he's got a big ol' beak, and there is no way I'm letting that thing mucking up my speshul pictures!
If he refuses have your photographer photoshop his face. By the way, speaking of photoshop
"Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."
Hey guys, how do I tell my MOH that she is totally fat and hideous looking and she needs to drop, like, 100 lbs RIGHTNOW or I'll have to kick her out of the WP?
No, girl, if she loses 100 pounds she'll be skinnier than you and then everyone will pay attention to her instead of you.
Instead, make her buy a designer dress that doesn't actually come in her size so she has to get it specially made for $1000 and then she'll still look awful and you'll look HOTTTTTT
I'm just getting all of my maids nutrisystem. It's perfect! It's their gift AND it will make them un-fat for the wedding!! (But the week leading up to the wedding, they'll be on a strict bacon diet so that they are bloated and don't look as good as I do!)
I'm just getting all of my maids nutrisystem. It's perfect! It's their gift AND it will make them un-fat for the wedding!! (But the week leading up to the wedding, they'll be on a strict bacon diet so that they are bloated and don't look as good as I do!)
Oh, make sure the makeup artist they all have to pay to do their makeup is given foundation a shade too dark. They'll look like oompa-loompas.
Hey guys, how do I tell my MOH that she is totally fat and hideous looking and she needs to drop, like, 100 lbs RIGHTNOW or I'll have to kick her out of the WP?
No, girl, if she loses 100 pounds she'll be skinnier than you and then everyone will pay attention to her instead of you.
Instead, make her buy a designer dress that doesn't actually come in her size so she has to get it specially made for $1000 and then she'll still look awful and you'll look HOTTTTTT
I found AMAZING dresses! They're puce with giant puffy sleeves and HUGE ass bows!! They're on sale too - only $1200 each!! I know my BMs are on tight budgets, but I'm sure they can eat potatoes and pasta for a few months to afford them. I mean, they're PERFECT!!
I'm making all of my bridesmaids get the same bob hair cut, because we are going Flapper Themed wedding, oh and they totes have to get acrylic nails and get pedicures because our nails all have to be matchy! I'm also kicking out my maid of honor too because that selfish b---ch is preggers and you know can't have baby bumps in the wedding pictures!
I found AMAZING dresses! They're puce with giant puffy sleeves and HUGE ass bows!! They're on sale too - only $1200 each!! I know my BMs are on tight budgets, but I'm sure they can eat potatoes and pasta for a few months to afford them. I mean, they're PERFECT!!
This is funny because I actually saw a HIDEOUS dress in a shop that was like hot pink and black lace and it was massive like Gypsy status and I sent a picture to my best friend/BM saying I found your dress, it's only $900, isn't it perfect!! And at first she laughed but then she was like wait, you are kidding right? I was like really, you've known me since 7th grade and you had to ask if I was kidding?!!?!? LOL
This is funny because I actually saw a HIDEOUS dress in a shop that was like hot pink and black lace and it was massive like Gypsy status and I sent a picture to my best friend/BM saying I found your dress, it's only $900, isn't it perfect!! And at first she laughed but then she was like wait, you are kidding right? I was like really, you've known me since 7th grade and you had to ask if I was kidding?!!?!? LOL
I saw the most ridic bridesmaid dresses in a bridal magazine last year. Black and hot pink satin, color block, short with crinoline... and matching leather gloves. I wanted to vomit!!
I'm sorry, but there aren't enough assbows in any of those dresses. Even the bows on the pink/black dresses on the bottom aren't nearly big enough for my BMs. They need assbows the size of Cadillacs, dammit!!
I'm sorry, but there aren't enough assbows in any of those dresses. Even the bows on the pink/black dresses on the bottom aren't nearly big enough for my BMs. They need assbows the size of Cadillacs, dammit!!
Unfortunately, I can't see if the photos I attached are showing up...look at the links though, what about the dress with the bow under the boobs?
My apologies Cookie!! We must go into business together, making assbows for every dress, and we'll put boning in them so they can double as serving platters. BMs can balance an entire slab of meat on one side and 15 cocktails on the other!
I know, let's make them all in leopard print! From several of the dresses above, it appears leopard print is hawt.
@mimiphin, that peacock dress also comes in a floor length in the various colors.
@prettygirllost, as your brideslave, I must also not cut my hair for a year in advance while you decide what style you want us all in. If I do cut my hair, I must take you to the swankiest restaurant in town to apologize, and buy hair extensions for my head.
I'm dying over here!! I think this is the only forum I might visit from now on....I feel normal in here! I get I'm a little older than most newly engaged & this isn't my 1st marriage but will be my 1st "wedding", but FFS....some of these people make me wonder if they've lived in a cave their whole lives.
Re: super annoying reading the same posts/questions
"Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."
"Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."
"Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."
So asking one of the GM to get a nose job before the wedding is totally okay, right? Cuz he's got a big ol' beak, and there is no way I'm letting that thing mucking up my speshul pictures!
Also, I've never been to Hawaii so you bitches better take me there for my bachelorette weekend, even though you're paying for your own wedding 5 months later and I'll too broke to bring you to Chuck E Cheese for yours. K- THX!!
Well obviously she wouldn't get a gift! And the only gift my BMs are getting is jewelry that they must wear for the ceremony but it's totes adorbs enough that they can wear it all the time after my wedding and remember MY special day forever!
"Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."
Instead, make her buy a designer dress that doesn't actually come in her size so she has to get it specially made for $1000 and then she'll still look awful and you'll look HOTTTTTT
Ladies, I think these dresses for Bridesmaids just might fit all your requirements!
If they don't, enjoy these selections...
http://www.amazon.com/Metallic-Peacock-Embroidered-Holiday-Junior/dp/B006JUA7BM/ref=sr_1_24?s=apparel&ie=UTF8&qid=1389885571&sr=1-24&keywords=prom+dress
http://www.amazon.com/Pretty-Chiffon-Pleated-HE09639RD10-Multiple/dp/B0072QVKG8/ref=sr_1_40?s=apparel&ie=UTF8&qid=1389885571&sr=1-40&keywords=prom+dress
http://www.amazon.com/Beaded-Fairy-Dress-Formal-Fuchsia/dp/B00CFNC184/ref=sr_1_46?s=apparel&ie=UTF8&qid=1389885571&sr=1-46&keywords=prom+dress
http://www.amazon.com/Faironly-Short-Dress-Cocktail-Homecoming/dp/B00C45A8Y2/ref=sr_1_83?s=apparel&ie=UTF8&qid=1389885612&sr=1-83&keywords=prom+dress
http://www.amazon.com/Trailing-Printed-Rhinestones-Evening-HE09743YL14/dp/B009S3GNSI/ref=sr_1_110?s=apparel&ie=UTF8&qid=1389885638&sr=1-110&keywords=prom+dress
http://www.amazon.com/Zeagoo-Sequins-Flouncing-Bridesmaid-Strapless/dp/B00EB3L9KC/ref=sr_1_179?s=apparel&ie=UTF8&qid=1389885668&sr=1-179&keywords=prom+dress
http://www.amazon.com/Clarisse-Drop-Waist-17199-Multi/dp/B00CAXG1L2/ref=sr_1_200?s=apparel&ie=UTF8&qid=1389885693&sr=1-200&keywords=prom+dress
http://www.amazon.com/Meier-Women-Tulle-Strapless-Short/dp/B0067N85LU/ref=sr_1_204?s=apparel&ie=UTF8&qid=1389885693&sr=1-204&keywords=prom+dress
http://www.amazon.com/Vintage-Pin-Up-Beaded-High-Low-Pageant/dp/B007IARJAY/ref=sr_1_228?s=apparel&ie=UTF8&qid=1389885693&sr=1-228&keywords=prom+dress
http://www.amazon.com/Beaded-Organza-High-Low-Ruffle-Pageant/dp/B00AV10CMY/ref=pd_sim_sbs_a_5
Unfortunately, I can't see if the photos I attached are showing up...look at the links though, what about the dress with the bow under the boobs?
My apologies Cookie!! We must go into business together, making assbows for every dress, and we'll put boning in them so they can double as serving platters. BMs can balance an entire slab of meat on one side and 15 cocktails on the other!
I know, let's make them all in leopard print! From several of the dresses above, it appears leopard print is hawt.
I know we are having fun with all this ridiculousness but I just have to say this....Bridesmaids with baby bumps look so DAMN cute!!!
@mimiphin, that peacock dress also comes in a floor length in the various colors.
@prettygirllost, as your brideslave, I must also not cut my hair for a year in advance while you decide what style you want us all in. If I do cut my hair, I must take you to the swankiest restaurant in town to apologize, and buy hair extensions for my head.