How to Address an "Almost Married" Couple

jaxx02

I am not sure how to address an invite to a couple that will be married one month before my wedding but will not be married when they receive my invitation.  I feel like it's bad luck to address them as "Mr. and Mrs. Smith" before it's official but at the same time I don't want to insult them by addressing them separately.  Would "The Future Mr. and Mrs. Smith" suffice?  Thoughts? 

Artemischief

I would say address the invite to Mr. John Smith and Ms. Jane Doe, as long as they would receive the invite before their wedding. Then obviously, the thank you would be to Mr. And Mrs. John Smith. If you did "The future..." and I received it, I would assume it was a wedding card/gift for my own wedding. Now this could be completely wrong, but that is what I would do.

mysticl

jaxx02 said:

I am not sure how to address an invite to a couple that will be married one month before my wedding but will not be married when they receive my invitation.  I feel like it's bad luck to address them as "Mr. and Mrs. Smith" before it's official but at the same time I don't want to insult them by addressing them separately.  Would "The Future Mr. and Mrs. Smith" suffice?  Thoughts? 

I vote no.  Address it based on what their names are at the time you send out the invite.  It is in no way insulting to address someone by their name or to acknowledge their current relationship status.  

jaxx02

Yes, I was concerned that it would be mistaken as something meant for them.  Thanks for your response!

KatWAG

You cant be "almost married." Its the same thing as being a little bit pregnant. Either you are or you are not.

Jen4948

No, address the invitations to them based on their names and status at the time the invitation goes out.  Even if they don't receive it until after they're married, you're acknowledging their status as of the date you're inviting them.

AddieCake

Address it the way you would any other living together but unmarried couple.

huskypuppy14

Artemischief said:

I would say address the invite to Mr. John Smith and Ms. Jane Doe, as long as they would receive the invite before their wedding. Then obviously, the thank you would be to Mr. And Mrs. John Smith. If you did "The future..." and I received it, I would assume it was a wedding card/gift for my own wedding. Now this could be completely wrong, but that is what I would do.

Not obviously, what if the woman is not changing her name?

Artemischief

Since OP mentioned something about the "future Mr. And Mrs. Smith" I was going off that. If she was not changing her last name, of course you would not address it that way, but given as this scenario implied she was changing I answered accordingly.

huskypuppy14

Artemischief I figured as much. It was more as a reminder to others that not every woman changes her name when getting married. So make sure you know how people want to be addressed. 

Artemischief

Very true. When our friends got married we didn't know she wasn't changing her last name(hers is unusual, his is fairly common). We were embarrassed when we found out after we had already given a card to Mr. And Mrs. Last name. She understood though, and we haven't made that mistake again.

Jen4948

laurynm84 said:

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Artemischief said:

I would say address the invite to Mr. John Smith and Ms. Jane Doe, as long as they would receive the invite before their wedding. Then obviously, the thank you would be to Mr. And Mrs. John Smith. If you did "The future..." and I received it, I would assume it was a wedding card/gift for my own wedding. Now this could be completely wrong, but that is what I would do.

Not obviously, what if the woman is not changing her name?

It would be sent to whatever names the couple are using at the time the invitations go out.

HisGirlFriday13

Do whatever is least likely to confuse the United States Postal Service. In this case, "Mr. John Doe/Ms. Susan Jones."

SKPM

HisGirlFriday13 said:

Do whatever is least likely to confuse the United States Postal Service. In this case, "Mr. John Doe/Ms. Susan Jones."

This. And if you are not 100% positive that she plans to take his name, I wouldn't use Mr. & Mrs. His Name after their wedding anyway.

JennyColada

If I am Miss Jenny Colada and not yet Mrs Jenny Knott then I don't want you to refer to me (on invitation or otherwise) as Mrs Jenny Knott.