Etiquette RANT!

antoto

tcnoble said:

@antoto you do make a good point. She is doing a full catholic mass and ceremony, then spending an hour or two doing pictures with all of us around town. So, it will really come down to what her mom finds. I do think you present a great alternative though! 

Ah, that kind of changes things  

Pray for the best and bring your flats!  lol

tcnoble

@antoto exactly, if it were a quick 20-30 minute ceremony and maybe an hour max. for pictures, I would oblige. But this shindig is going to put me in these shoes for roughly 3 hours.. easier said than done! haha so we will see how it plays out.

mbross3

Can you wait and see what the mother finds and then look for more comfortable styles in a similar color? That way at quick glance maybe no one will notice? Unless the dresses are short ones (sorry if I missed that!)

tcnoble

@mbross3 dresses are long so if the mom's choice is totally unbearable it's likely I will be able to pull it off with flats

PrettyGirlLost

tcnoble said:

@antoto you do make a good point. She is doing a full catholic mass and ceremony, then spending an hour or two doing pictures with all of us around town. So, it will really come down to what her mom finds. I do think you present a great alternative though! 

A Catholic mass is only 45mins to an hour, and you will be sitting the majority of the time.

However, I wouldn't want to be stuck in shoes I find uncomfortable for 1-2 hours while doing pictures after mass.

Just tell the Bride you can't wear the heels for pictures because then you will be way too tall and the pictures will look funny ;-)

cowgirl8238

PrettyGirlLost said:

tcnoble said:

@antoto you do make a good point. She is doing a full catholic mass and ceremony, then spending an hour or two doing pictures with all of us around town. So, it will really come down to what her mom finds. I do think you present a great alternative though! 

A Catholic mass is only 45mins to an hour, and you will be sitting the majority of the time.

However, I wouldn't want to be stuck in shoes I find uncomfortable for 1-2 hours while doing pictures after mass.

Just tell the Bride you can't wear the heels for pictures because then you will be way too tall and the pictures will look funny ;-)

It sounds like this would be the kind of thing that makes the bride actually care too!  If your comfort doesn't matter then maybe her pictures will.

APDSS22

tcnoble said:

@mbross3 dresses are long so if the mom's choice is totally unbearable it's likely I will be able to pull it off with flats

If it were me (and I never wear heels so I could see me in this position) I would wait to see what the mom picks out.  Maybe she'll get something lovely...and flat.  Best case scenario.  Worst case scenario, she picks out stripper heels that are not only uncomfortable, but also terribly tacky.  In that case, I would bring my flats and if the bride notices go "ohmygosh!  I left the heels you guys got me at home but thank GOODNESS I had these in my car, huh?  Looks like they're ready for us to line up!"  Most of the people I know would be too distracted by the fact they're getting married, didn't get enough sleep, the flower girl's stripping or the groomsmen are all drunk to notice the footwear of the bridesmaids and even if they did, they would definitely not cause a scene on the way down the aisle.  Anyone who does pretty much deserves to look foolish.

PhoneCardLady

OliveOilsMom said:

I may kindly warn her about over inviting the max a room can handle.  Tell her that you are on TK and actually have seen people have had 100% attendance.  Also tell her that you are trying to give her a heads up so she doesn't have a crisis on her hands a few weeks before her wedding. The other stuff I would just let pass unless she specifically says something to you.

I wonder if the venue could actually call her out on how many people can occupy - perhaps barring people from even entering??  Fire laws??