Chit Chat

Doggie Guilt

Feeling MAJOR guilt over leaving our dog for two nights while we get married. Ugh...she never leaves my side since I work from home. I'm worried she's going to feel abandoned and make herself sick or run away...

anyone else feeling this?
Cokezerofreak

Re: Doggie Guilt

  • Where are you leaving her?
    image 
  • FI and I travel a lot. I am always sad when we leave her. But our neighbor and his wife dog sit for us and she loves going there. They take really good care of her so I know she's in good hands. That helps to ease my mind. 
    I will totally admit to calling the neighbor while we're away to check on her. I'm just crazy like that. 
    So, I totally get it. 
    Cokezerofreak
  • My fiance and I do a lot of traveling during the summers. If we cannot bring our pit bull somewhere we leave her with my mom because I know she will get tons of attention and loving and will not be ignored. I have never been comfortable with leaving her at a daycare or something similar but leaving her with someone I trust really puts my mind at ease (for the most part).

    One thing I have noticed helps is I try to provide everything to prevent such things like her getting sick, not eating or running away. I make sure she has a really meaty dog food - she can't resist that even when she is depressed. When we used to travel she would actually not eat for the first couple of days and I freaked out. I also provide blankets and her dog bed. It's kind of a reminder to my mom that my dog likes to snuggle and so my mom sets up all the blankets on the couch next to her when she is working so my little girl isn't alone. I also pack multiple bags of treats and all of the vet information and her vaccinations in case she does get sick. Even though these things are just that, things, when prepping a "sleep away bag" it really helps me calm myself down because I know that the person I am having watch my little girl is going to be as attentive to her as I am to prepping for her to stay somewhere.
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  • My fiance and I do a lot of traveling during the summers. If we cannot bring our pit bull somewhere we leave her with my mom because I know she will get tons of attention and loving and will not be ignored. I have never been comfortable with leaving her at a daycare or something similar but leaving her with someone I trust really puts my mind at ease (for the most part).

    One thing I have noticed helps is I try to provide everything to prevent such things like her getting sick, not eating or running away. I make sure she has a really meaty dog food - she can't resist that even when she is depressed. When we used to travel she would actually not eat for the first couple of days and I freaked out. I also provide blankets and her dog bed. It's kind of a reminder to my mom that my dog likes to snuggle and so my mom sets up all the blankets on the couch next to her when she is working so my little girl isn't alone. I also pack multiple bags of treats and all of the vet information and her vaccinations in case she does get sick. Even though these things are just that, things, when prepping a "sleep away bag" it really helps me calm myself down because I know that the person I am having watch my little girl is going to be as attentive to her as I am to prepping for her to stay somewhere.
    I do this too! I always send her with her dog bed, her food bowls, her favorite blanket and her favorite toys. I have a folder with all her info - vet, shots, microchip, etc. 
    PolarBearFitzpumpkinsandturkeyslizandmark2014
  • My fiance and I do a lot of traveling during the summers. If we cannot bring our pit bull somewhere we leave her with my mom because I know she will get tons of attention and loving and will not be ignored. I have never been comfortable with leaving her at a daycare or something similar but leaving her with someone I trust really puts my mind at ease (for the most part).

    One thing I have noticed helps is I try to provide everything to prevent such things like her getting sick, not eating or running away. I make sure she has a really meaty dog food - she can't resist that even when she is depressed. When we used to travel she would actually not eat for the first couple of days and I freaked out. I also provide blankets and her dog bed. It's kind of a reminder to my mom that my dog likes to snuggle and so my mom sets up all the blankets on the couch next to her when she is working so my little girl isn't alone. I also pack multiple bags of treats and all of the vet information and her vaccinations in case she does get sick. Even though these things are just that, things, when prepping a "sleep away bag" it really helps me calm myself down because I know that the person I am having watch my little girl is going to be as attentive to her as I am to prepping for her to stay somewhere.
    I do this too! I always send her with her dog bed, her food bowls, her favorite blanket and her favorite toys. I have a folder with all her info - vet, shots, microchip, etc. 
    You just can't be too safe! I provide her food bowls too because I know she won't eat out of any other bowl unless I'm there. I'm telling you, fur babies can be very manipulative, they know how to pull at your heart strings - hahaha but I love her to death.
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    climbingsingle
  • Totally understand!  I take my dog to my parent's house every day for babysitting.  Every time I leave her, she drives me to the airport so I can say good bye (and she howls).  Then she picks me up too.  She picks the FI up too.  I hate leaving her but she'd give herself a heart attack if I put her with luggage on a plane.  She's too big for under the seat.
    satinwinter0308
  • We're seriously contemplating bringing Gus (not monster Olive, just Gus) with us when we get married. Not so much because we feel bad leaving him, but because he really is part human and deserves to be part of the celebration (...plus he was named after Augustus McCrae from Lonesome Dove so it seem particularly fitting for him to travel to Montana ;). I fear it's a pipe dream, though, so likely we'll have a coworker/friend come stay at the house with the dogs, both for convenience and routine sake. FI works from home and I work in a dog-friendly office, so between the two they are used to being around people nearly all the time. 
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    Cokezerofreak
  • I call Chef D the velcro dog.  He always has to be around a human.  I work from home now and it's even worse.      While I get worried when we are gone I know he is in good hands. Sometimes he stays with friends who also have a bulldog.   Other times he is boarded at a place that also has daycare.  He LOVES daycare.  He is there right now actually.   The humans always tell me he runs up them all day long almost saying "Hi, I'm just checking in with you".  Then he runs away and plays with other dogs and comes back a few minutes later saying "I'm back".  Then runs away again.  

    Silly dog.






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    lizandmark2014melbelleup
  • I always feel guilty boarding our dog too.  She has only had to be boarded twice since we got there, no issues that we know of.  She also goes to daycare and loves it!  She goes to camp a couple days a week.  That is where we typically board her if we go away so she knows the "counselors."  She loves all of them and she apparently jumps into their arms at every opportunity...
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  • pittiemama14pittiemama14 member
    5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    edited January 2014
    We have a friend of H's come and watch Liam at our house. Liam looooves said friend, and he's very responsible and great with dogs, so I know the dog is being well taken care of. I think it helps too that he comes and stays at our house, because then Liam still has all his stuff, own bed, toys, etc, and I think he feels less stressed that way. Liam does take our dirty clothes out of the hamper though and make a bed out of them when we go on a trip, according to friend. Lol
    The cats on the other hand, give us the cold shoulder for days after we get back though. But that's cats....
  • Luckily my parents will be watching my pups and staying at my house for our honeymoon. The dogs are familiar with them and other than my FI they are the only people I trust with them. This is mainly because they are rescues and need a bit more tender loving care. They are both wary of men in general and don't respond well to people they are unfamiliar with...

    Definitely hard to leave them :( as PPs have said giving them an article of clothing helps. Mine both have an old t-shirt in their beds that they snuggle with.
  • I feel bad leaving Ellie-cat when I travel. I know she's a cat, but she's the most dog-cat I've ever met. She takes it very personally -- she had terrible separation anxiety as a kitten and would cry when I went to work in the morning. She's given that up, but longer trips are still harder on her. I'm worried I look crazy to my cat-sitter(s), but I hire my friends who have met her before so she'll behave for them and request that they come meet her before I go. Seems silly for a cat, but I know boarding her would make her even more upset.
  • OP, has she ever stayed overnight somewhere before? If not, I recommend a few trial runs, if you have the time. If she's staying with family or a friend, perhaps spend one night with her over there, so she feels comfortable there for an extended period of time. Then maybe try a few hours of that same person doggy-sitting her during the day, and then move to an overnight stay without you, and see how it goes. This will give her a chance to relax, and give you a chance to anticipate her specific needs.

    I agree that anything and everything that makes her most comfortable should go with her. It may make you seem like a crazy fur parent, but it works. And if you're calm and positive about the experience, she'll read that and feed off of it.


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  • My mom always takes my fur babies when my FI and I have to travel. Both the doggie and kitty know they will be spoiled rotten by her. I send some of their favorite stuff with them when they go too. Also before I leave I always give them a new toy or something... I always feel a little guilty when I leave them but I know they'll be ok with my mom.
  • @pumpkinsandturkeys unfortunately we live across the country from where we will be having the wedding - we are driving. I may see if we can do at least a visit or two to whoever will be watching her the few days we get there before the wedding. That's a good idea and at least then she will have meet the person (whoever it will be) prior to the wedding and know we are coming back. 
    pumpkinsandturkeys
  • PolarBearFitz my pug is also a rescue and thats why I classify her as "high maintenance" in comparison with other dogs I've had...she needs more attention and their is a much higher risk of her getting sick or running away.
  • @satinwinter0308 yeah, that makes it difficult. Even if you could do a trial sleepover somewhere nearby, so that she understands that you ARE coming back when you leave her somewhere, that can make a big difference. Good luck!


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    satinwinter0308
  • I cry every time I kennel my dog. Every. Time.  

    He's a rescue and gets aggressive when he's nervous; and is particularly aggressive with males. (I thought it was interesting that he LOVED FI from the first time he met him)  The kennel I bring him to is totally laid back, and all women; so I feel a little better leaving him there.  And he's always giving them kisses when he leaves, so that's what I try to think about when I drop him off.
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    image
  • I now feel like an awful parent to my dog and cat. My dog has had this attitude that he allows me to live with him since the day he came home and the kitty followed suit. Before we got a roommate who pet sits when we go out of town FI would just put out the self dispensing food and water dishes and leave the back door cracked so they could go in and out (we live in the middle of nowhere and don't have a neighbor for a mile).

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  • vk2204 we are not even sure. Literally everyone we know will be at the wedding.There a possibility for one of my bridesmaids sisters to watch her.

    I really don't want to put her in a kennel...I was thinking possibly finding a doggy day care near the wedding and then picking her up and having her sleep with us that night. I should check and see if the hotel takes dogs.


  • melbelleupmelbelleup member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment First Answer
    edited February 2014
    I hear you. We're leaving our dogs for 3 weeks so we can honeymoon for a week. My parents always watch my dogs. I wouldn't trust them with anyone else. They watch them for me when we go up for Christmas since we split tine between my family and FIs family.so they're used to having them for 3-4 days by themselves. Perks of parents watching are they know the breed, my oldest is technically theirs so they know her and I don't have to pay :). Honey is reactive though so I would never board her. Ruutu would be fine with it but it's not worth it.

    I'm definitely going to miss them those three weeks though. But at least I know they will be in good hands. The three weeks btw is because we live 8 hours from my parents and will be going back up 3 weeks later for my brother's wedding


    ETA: darn auto correct
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