Weekday wedding reception...

SunflowerBride2014

Just started looking into venues and we were thinking of having our ceremony and reception on the Wednesday before the 4th of July. I'm having a hard time wrapping my head around it. Thoughts?

huskypuppy14

You can pick any day you want but realize that you may have more declines.

banana468

Not a huge fan. its the day before a holiday which can already be an issue but the timing would mean your guests have to take a portion or all of that day off work. It is an added inconvenience to the WP who would have one day of work ( assuming they work M-F) and then they would be on wedding duty.

SunflowerBride2014

My family, and I are teachers so we have the summer off. My fiancee has the week off so we're trying to do it during that week so we can head to Europe for a few weeks. 

banana468

SunflowerBride2014 said:

My family, and I are teachers so we have the summer off. My fiancee has the week off so we're trying to do it during that week so we can head to Europe for a few weeks. 

What about the rest of your guests?

At least if you made the wedding on the 4th, your guests may not need to take vacation time to attend. I'd roll my eyes if you wanted your guests to take time off of work so you didn't have to.

jdluvr06

I never go to weddings during the week unless it is Friday night and even then only if it is someone I'm really close to. I also never go to weddings the day before or of a holiday unless it is a relative because my family gets together for holidays and I would rather be with them than at a wedding.

HisGirlFriday13

I would decline. You'd have to be my brother (who's already married) for me to even think about this, and even then, I'd side-eye the crap out of this.

Yes, apparently it's very convenient for you/your family/your FI, but what about your guests who DON'T have off all summer?

Also -- if you have off all freaking summer, why can't you pick another weekend -- hell, even a Friday night or Sunday afternoon! -- to get married?

JoanE2012

HisGirlFriday13 said:

I would decline. You'd have to be my brother (who's already married) for me to even think about this, and even then, I'd side-eye the crap out of this.

Yes, apparently it's very convenient for you/your family/your FI, but what about your guests who DON'T have off all summer?

Also -- if you have off all freaking summer, why can't you pick another weekend -- hell, even a Friday night or Sunday afternoon! -- to get married?

This!  It's not like your trying to work you wedding around the Christmas week break.  Why must it be the day before the 4th?  

That said, pick any day you want.  Just realize you'll probably have lower attendance.   If it were a weekday AND right before a holiday, count me out.  I feel like you have not one but two things working against you if you want guests to come to your wedding.

SammiNJonni

This will be a serious inconvenience to your guests. I know if I was invited to a wedding in the middle of the week I would have to decline. You have the whole summer off why do you need your wedding to fall on the day before July 4th. In your first post you said you were having a hard time wrapping your head around it, I am too. Please make it easier on everyone and have your wedding on the weekend.

Cookie Pusher

I went to a Thursday night wedding once. The only reason I went was because it was one of my dearest friends ever. Had it been someone I wasn't close with, I would never, ever have gone. As the ceremony was 4pm and over an hour away (in the direction of traffic, no less), FI and I both had to take the day off from work so we could be ready and out the door by 2 o'clock. The reception was going until 10 or 11, so we would either have to leave early or take the next day off from work. We had a great time, but it really sucked being in that position.

Vivandiere8

Weddings on week days are hard enough (not judging, we had to put our on a Friday), but having it right before the 4th of July adds more trouble for your guests. A lot of people get off the 4th of July, but because of that employers really frown on those who ask off the day before the holiday as well. But it really is up to you. You don't have to have a day that's convenient for all guests, but you do have to realize that it would probably mean a lot of declines.

QueerFemme

You can do it, but like everyone else already mentioned, expect a lot of declines. If you are OK with having a lot of people deciding not to come, then feel free. As a guest, I'd be bummed that you decided to make things so inconvenient.

CMGragain

There is nothing wrong in having a weekday wedding.  Just don't take it personally when you get regrets from guests who can't make it.

fionahalliwell

I've been to weekday weddings. They've all been religious Jewish couples. In that particular community, it didn't seem to have a serious impact, but I can't imagine having a weeknight wedding. Too inconvenient for too many people! 

Just pick another summer weekend. That particular weekend is also so loaded. I know you'd have to be someone really special for my mom to be willing to give up her annual 4th of July plans. Beyond that specific day, I know that my cousin nearly had 3 weddings in eight days during that time. If you have summers off, don't you have at least part of June or August available? 

lovesclimbing

I had a middle week wedding. We double-checked with all our VIPs and they could all come. So it worked for us.

cowgirl8238

Unless you were a really close friend or a relative I would probably end up passing on this.  If you are having a samml intimate wedding with only your closest this may still work for you, but its not ideal.  I am not sure why you just don't have the wedding the weekend before, and then take your honeymoon whenever after...if that is your main concern.

aurorajanette

Personally from the stand point of someone working in healthcare, people taking vacation days during the week of the holiday is extremely hard. Every single person in creation wants off that week, and I can only give the people who actually work on the holiday off on the days before and after the holiday. People who don't work the holiday cannot get off in the days leading up to it. I know that this is the way that many health care facilities operate. So if any of your guests are in healthcare, I wouldn't expect them to show up.

Also, I know that where I live (Philadelphia area), it's extremely difficult to go anywhere around the fourth of July because of all of the people either heading to the Jersey/Delaware shores or the Poconos. Consider that extreme traffic may be an issue for your event and may cause people to not come.

ei34

I'd take more of an issue with it being so close to a holiday than on a weeknight.  More guests than usual might decline.

And as a rule it's best to think in terms of what's convenient for the majority of the wedding guests, not just the VIPs.  A lot of people aren't off all summer.

sarahufl

I personally despise both weekday AND holiday weddings. They are just very disruptive. The only way I would go to this is if you were very, very important to me and/or I did not have to travel at all.

Maggie0829

If you really want a mid-week wedding then why not have it on the thursday before the 4th of July. This way more guests may be willing to leave work a bit early to attend and party it up because most people are off the next day for the holiday.

But I am with the PP, a mid-week wedding would most likely get you a decline from me.  I work M-F all year long and going to the wedding in the middle of the week is the last thing that I would want to do.  And if I did come I would be leaving really early, like right after dinner was done, because I would be having to get up early the next day to go to work.

If you are okay with getting a large amount of declines then go for it.

climbingsingle

For me, that would be a really inconvenient day. It's not even the day before July 4th. So I'd have to take at least one day off of work. Not always the easiest thing to do around a summer holiday. 

RedJacks25

We're going to an out-of-state wedding this July, on a Thursday. They've already said they expect a lot of people to not be able to go, but the reason they chose the date is because the bride's grandmother (at some point) said she wanted them to get married on July 17th. Then she passed away. They want to honor her wishes and get married on that date, regardless of the fact that it's a Thursday.

If the date has some special meaning to you, then definitely go ahead and get married that day, but you need to expect that a lot of people won't go.

ETA: And actually the only reason we're going to the wedding is because it's FI's best friend and he's the best man. If that weren't the case, I'm not sure either one of us would be going.

Jen4948

You can have a weekday wedding, but more people will decline their invitations than if the wedding is on a weekend.

antoto

SunflowerBride2014 said:

My family, and I are teachers so we have the summer off. My fiancee has the week off so we're trying to do it during that week so we can head to Europe for a few weeks. 

Why can't you do it the Saturday, or heck even Sunday before?

I just don't personally enjoy wedding which require me to request work off unless there is a reallllly good reason.  You wanting to go to Europe for a few weeks is not a good reason for me to miss work.

PrettyGirlLost

SunflowerBride2014 said:

Just started looking into venues and we were thinking of having our ceremony and reception on the Wednesday before the 4th of July. I'm having a hard time wrapping my head around it. Thoughts?

I don't think this is a good idea.  You are going to get a ton of declines.  Many people have annual 4th of July traditions and family vacations planned, and they may be planning on traveling that Wednesday.  If they are not planning on taking that day off, they probably won't be inclined to do so for a wedding.

HisGirlFriday13 said:

Also -- if you have off all freaking summer, why can't you pick another weekend -- hell, even a Friday night or Sunday afternoon! -- to get married?

Also, this^

happywiggle

Getting married on Wednesday is a lot different from a Friday night or a weekend wedding. You're asking people to take 1 day off work in the middle of a holiday week, and it would probably be more time if they don't live in the same town.

As PPs said, why not the weekend before? If you must go through with it this day, expect a lot of declines. I myself am doing a Friday night, but we chose the specific date for a reason and know that it would be a lot easier to get a half day on Friday for our guests than to get a week day off work.

ohmrs2014

Even thought I'm getting married on a Friday evening (everything is at one place the ceremony starts at 6:15pm, which is after most people get out of work, and I'm expecting some people to arrive late), I would never go to a weekday wedding that wasn't a close family member, and by close I mean siblings.  

It can be a huge inconvenience to your guests who can't take the day off. 

Simply Fated

It depends on your guests. For my SO and I, weekdays are much easier than weekends. However, holidays, and the immediate days surrounding them, are near impossible for us to attend.

I would take a close look at the people you definitely want there and see if they are on the same page as you. It could be that they might not mind a weekday wedding, but the day before a holiday could be an issue. What's easiest and best for you, might be hard for other people.

Fairyjen1

CMGragain said:

There is nothing wrong in having a weekday wedding.  Just don't take it personally when you get regrets from guests who can't make it.

This, I don't think you are breaching etiquette by having a weekday wedding, but you have to be okay with more declines than you would get on a weekend. Personally, If I could make it I would still go, but I have a job with a lot of flexibility.

We are probably getting married at Disneyland and it will take place on a Monday. We are doing immediate family only though and both sets of our parents are retired, my sisters family lives down there, and fi's brother says he's looking forward to spending time at Disneyland with his family no matter when we get married. That's all who we are inviting. If any of them had a problem with it we would have figured out something else.