Outdoor wedding held by a Roman Catholic priest

rachaelyoung

My fiance and I are very devote Roman Catholics, we attend church every Sunday and I have very rarely missed a mass due to illness. I, however, never knew that a catholic ceremony could not be held outdoors, because I have been to some Sunday services that have been held outdoors and no one has ever came out and told me that.

I have already booked my wedding venue to have my ceremony held outside. Since I was a little girl I have always said that I want to get married outside and now have the whole vision of my wedding at our venue pretty much just the way I want it.

We were told by our priest that we can get married by a minister and then have our vows renewed later by him but I would really just like to do it the first time, the right way and acknowledged by the church. 

Does anyone know of a way around this? I have heard of an American Catholic priest but that would not be recognized by the archdiocese, according to my priest. Or I have read some things about finding a hospital priest because they can perform sacraments outside of the church.

Any suggestions?

lyndausvi

You can get married outside with permission from the head of the archdiocese.  It's rare and often those people have very, very strong personal connections to the Cardinal or bishop.   

It doesn't sound like that is the case with you, so your options are get married in the church or  get married outside and not have a marriage recognized by the church.

hikebikebemerry

rachaelyoung said:

My fiance and I are very devote Roman Catholics, we attend church every Sunday and I have very rarely missed a mass due to illness. I, however, never knew that a catholic ceremony could not be held outdoors, because I have been to some Sunday services that have been held outdoors and no one has ever came out and told me that.

I have already booked my wedding venue to have my ceremony held outside. Since I was a little girl I have always said that I want to get married outside and now have the whole vision of my wedding at our venue pretty much just the way I want it.

We were told by our priest that we can get married by a minister and then have our vows renewed later by him but I would really just like to do it the first time, the right way and acknowledged by the church. 

Does anyone know of a way around this? I have heard of an American Catholic priest but that would not be recognized by the archdiocese, according to my priest. Or I have read some things about finding a hospital priest because they can perform sacraments outside of the church.

Any suggestions?

I am not religious, but if I was; I would be willing to kiss a deposit/ dream ceremony location goodbye to honor my faith.

mommapizano

My husband and I are both Catholic and were married in the church. Unfortunately it is highly unlikely to get such a request approved. It is not impossible but very unlikely. Our reception venue had a beautiful outdoor space but we knew it could not be used for our ceremony so we used it for the cocktail hour. 

If your faith is important, I would suggest to get married in the church and maybe you can do your cocktail hour in this amazing outdoor space? 

MobKaz

rachaelyoung said:

My fiance and I are very devote Roman Catholics, we attend church every Sunday and I have very rarely missed a mass due to illness. I, however, never knew that a catholic ceremony could not be held outdoors, because I have been to some Sunday services that have been held outdoors and no one has ever came out and told me that.

I have already booked my wedding venue to have my ceremony held outside. Since I was a little girl I have always said that I want to get married outside and now have the whole vision of my wedding at our venue pretty much just the way I want it.

We were told by our priest that we can get married by a minister and then have our vows renewed later by him but I would really just like to do it the first time, the right way and acknowledged by the church. 

Does anyone know of a way around this? I have heard of an American Catholic priest but that would not be recognized by the archdiocese, according to my priest. Or I have read some things about finding a hospital priest because they can perform sacraments outside of the church.

Any suggestions?

No valid priest will hold your wedding in anything other than a Catholic church. There is really no way around it.  If I am not mistaken, the concept involving the hospital priest indicates that the dispensation is for that priest being able to say mass in hospital chapels versus a parish church.  It does not mean that the hospital priest can say Mass anywhere he chooses.

To be honest, if you attend Mass weekly, I am surprised you read nothing in your bulletin about procedures regarding weddings.  Our bulletin has a standard page that lists all requirements for the sacraments, from baptism to weddings.  It is made very clear that nothing should be booked until you have spoken to the parish office and/or pastor.

I understand your desire to marry based on some childhood vision.  I would think as an adult, however, your devout faith would make this decision a no-brainer.  Faith should trump aesthetics.

HisGirlFriday13

1. Deleting your post on the other board was rude.

2. Please page a KG and have your SN changed to something that isn't your real name.

3. What you want isn't possible. Sorry. You're going to have to decide if your faith or your aesthetic vision is more important to you.

4. How can you be 'devoutly' Roman Catholic and not have know this? That just baffles me.

CMGragain

Shame on you for deleting your post on the other board!  You were inexcusably rude to do that.  Go back and apologize to those ladies immediately.

Here is a quote from Miss Manners:

"When you had that childhood wedding fantasy, you were a child. If you don't have better taste and a greater sense of social and fiscal responsibility now, you're too immature to get married."

What is more important to you - your childhood fantasy, or your religion?

lyndausvi

Ladies, I hate DDs just like everyone else, but now that I found it here I'm thinking jumping on that bandwagon is a little premature.

I'm just going to go out on a limb here and say she might have thought she was posting on here, found out it was really the Etiquette board, tried to delete, found out she couldn't and then just deleted what she wrote and re-posted it here.   

Rookie mistake.

phira

OP, people are still trying to give you advice in your deleted topic. I'm super irritated that I spent the time writing a post to you only to have you DD your topic and ignore it.

JCbride2015

I followed this post over from Etiquette-- silver lining, now I noticed there is an Outdoor Weddings board!

CMGragain

lyndausvi said:

Ladies, I hate DDs just like everyone else, but now that I found it here I'm thinking jumping on that bandwagon is a little premature.

I'm just going to go out on a limb here and say she might have thought she was posting on here, found out it was really the Etiquette board, tried to delete, found out she couldn't and then just deleted what she wrote and re-posted it here.   

Rookie mistake.

OK.  She can go back to that board, where so many ladies gave her advice, apologize, and re-post her question and title.

doeydo

HisGirlFriday13 said:

1. Deleting your post on the other board was rude. 2. Please page a KG and have your SN changed to something that isn't your real name. 3. What you want isn't possible. Sorry. You're going to have to decide if your faith or your aesthetic vision is more important to you. 4. How can you be 'devoutly' Roman Catholic and not have know this? That just baffles me.

@KnotPorscha could you help OP with this?  Also, when the first thing comes up to someone coming on the forum and choosing their username, could you please put something about not including personal information or real names (unless you already have and people just don't listen)?

Sugargirl1019

I second a PP's suggestion. Since you already have a down payment for this outdoor space I assume, use this space for your reception. Get married in the church instead.

I tried to find a "catholic priest" who would marry me at an outside venue and found a group that told me I would receive the sacrament and be recognized by the church and can still receive communion. I was ecstatic. Then others brought it up that it's not Roman Catholic, and my mom talked to me more about it - I feel that I was lied to by the group because a universal catholic group isn't Roman Catholic, so you still are going against the Church's beliefs and sinning and one who is devout to their faith would not be okay with this. So please don't fall for these type of groups if you find them.

FiancB

I posted on the etiquette thread. I agree that it isn't so terrible to have moved over here, she deleted so fast it's pretty clear she realized it's better off over in outdoor wedding than etiquette, though I think a mod could've moved it. 

Clif notes are, it's not possible. You could still have a lovely outdoor reception with a ceremony in a gorgeous church, or you could have someone that isn't RC marry you. 

MrsMarende

OP - Is it possible to have your ceremony in the church, but them move to an outdoor venue for the reception? 

I am not Catholic, but from PPs it seems like the Ceremony is the part that needs to be done indoors?

[Deleted User]

@Schatzi13 reinstating mods is still in the works. We know you're all looking forward to having them back ... I'll make sure to post updates once they become available  

MobKaz

KnotPorscha said:

@Schatzi13 reinstating mods is still in the works. We know you're all looking forward to having them back ... I'll make sure to post updates once they become available  

To piggyback off this......will you be soliciting volunteers? How will moderators be selected? Do you have a criteria?

CamiSelene

I understand your feelings about wanting to get married Catholic and wanting to get married outside. I had the same issue when I started planning my wedding but it is just not possible without permission from the archdiocese and that only ever happens in EXTREMELY RARE cases. In the end, my FH and I decided to go with a jp (he's athiest anyways) and we are doing a love letter ceremony in place of the unity candle. As well, I will be wrapping my grandmothers silver rosary from the vatican that she had at her wedding on the same day, 62 years ago, around my bouquet. Sometimes your vision must change so decide what is most important to you. What if you get married in the church privately in the morning and then renew your vows outside for your full ceremony?

banana468

Please don't renew vows in front of your wedding guests. They are there to see you get married and not to witness a renewal.