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Gay Weddings

parents are unhappy and money is running out

so i have a unhappy soon to be mother in law.  this woman had the guts to tell her daughter just months before our wedding that she is unhappy, that she  thought being gay was a phase and the only thing that will make her happy is if my fiance wears cowboy boots yup there u have it. so now we must spend a good $150 on REAL cowboy boots that she must wear in the middle of june to out out door wedding that the inlaws hate  so yup just need to vent maybe some one can help me on how to handle this new hate on our wedding. my fiance is crushed we thought her mom we happy with us.  

Re: parents are unhappy and money is running out

  • Tell your fiance not to cave and wear boots. It's your wedding, wear what you want. Mom sounds manipulative. Maybe her hate is just a phase that she'll grow out of
    minsu5
  • If you give in to this ridiculousness now it is only the start.  She will see she can get her way with something really out to lunch and it will set the stage for that kind of behavior all through your marriage.  Your FI needs to set boundaries with her mom now!
  • Tell your fiance not to cave and wear boots. It's your wedding, wear what you want. Mom sounds manipulative. Maybe her hate is just a phase that she'll grow out of
    I am shocked that cowboy boots will somehow assuage the fact that her daughter is a lesbian and it's not a phase. I agree with @QueerFemme, your fiance should wear what she wants and politely inform her mother that there's more to life and one's identity than a pair of boots.

    Sunday, May 18, 2014 - Baltimore, Maryland

    "Each time you love, love as deeply as if it were forever" - Audre Lorde

    noahark1
  • Do your FI grow up on a farm/ranch? Or did she wear boots as a little girl? I just ask because maybe mom is trying to hold onto something from the past from when your FI was a little girl. Just trying to figure out why the boots are so important to her.

    I would have sandles or flip flops (whatever FI is comfortable in) on standby and if her feet get too hot she can just switch shoes & tell mom, I'm sorry by my feet are so hot I'm miserable. Just get a few photos with mom & her & the boots before hand.

  • Why the hell does her mother want her to wear cowboy boots? That's a ridiculous request!
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  • thank you all for your wise words.
    the boots started a war we couldn't fight so she is going to wear them. 
    on the bright side she also got a tux! we didn't tell her mom and will be changing into that for the reception, like she had wanted to all along.
    DCHORETTE
  • My future step-FIL posted on my fb the other day that a True Marriage is between a MAN & WOMAN... yup...5 happy months before we walk down the aisle... I'll take cowboy boots over hate anyday.
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  • My future step-FIL posted on my fb the other day that a True Marriage is between a MAN & WOMAN... yup...5 happy months before we walk down the aisle... I'll take cowboy boots over hate anyday.
    Oh that is straight ignorant. Is your future step-FIL coming to the ceremony?

    Sunday, May 18, 2014 - Baltimore, Maryland

    "Each time you love, love as deeply as if it were forever" - Audre Lorde

  • VulgarGirlVulgarGirl Desert Oasis member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary Name Dropper
    Do cowboy boots make you less gay somehow? Because I've got a pair and...I'm pretty sure I'm still a lesbian when I wear them.
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    minsu5
  • I am not sure if he will be attending or not.  For my sake, I hope not, because I don't want to see him on the happiest day of my life, but for hers, I hope he can put his ignorance aside. 
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