My poor brother... NWR

McCMal

So my brother's girl friend just dumped him. Like, woke up one morning, said I'm leaving and left him. 

Since then she has talked to him on and off, tried to meet up with him then canceled, gone to his work and made a big deal, liked all his statuses on FB and all. He's told her he loves her and wants her back, but if she's gone, she needs to be gone. She posted stuff all about leaving and traveling away from the town they live in, etc. I texted her and told her she needed to leave him alone, she and I were friends before. I told her I knew my brother and he was having a hard time with this, and actually begged me to tell her to either come back or stay away... she didn't know what to say to me. I was polite. 

Now I see that she is back with ONE of her ex-fiances. She's had about 5 of them. She's going on and on about how in love she is with her ex now boyfriend, and is posting a bunch of pictures of them together. 

I can only imagine what my brother is feeling... He's been in the Army for 14 years, was married but got divorced and has custody of his 9 year old son, who loved this girl. Most of his relationships were with girls who just wanted a meal ticket. But they were together for 5 months, and she raved about how my brother was the best man she'd ever met. I'd never seen my brother this happy, and in a fully functional, happy relationship. Her ex was abusive to her, actually threatened to kill her at some point. 

I really just can't believe it. I thought it was a bit of commitment issues, and she'd be back when she missed him... But I guess I didn't know very much about her. Thanks for listening to this rant, I just don't know what to tell my brother. He didn't unfriend her because he truly, truly loves her. He won't because he doesn't want to be rude... I've told him not to respond to her texts, ignore her but he still loves her. How do you help someone though something this hurtful? He has diagnosed PTSD, and though he's handled this so well, so far, I'm worried about him.

Edited for formating

pinkshorts27

I'm sorry for your brother. That sucks.  

pinkcow13

I'm really sorry about your brother and that he is going through this. It is hard to help someone going through this, because no matter what you say, they have to come to terms with the breakup themselves. Being that he has PTSD, is he talking to a counselor? I feel that a professional would help in this case.

McCMal

pinkcow13 said:

I'm really sorry about your brother and that he is going through this. It is hard to help someone going through this, because no matter what you say, they have to come to terms with the breakup themselves. Being that he has PTSD, is he talking to a counselor? I feel that a professional would help in this case.

He's been told by the army he needs a counselor. We've all tried to get him to go, but he absolutely refuses to go unless mandated. Amazingly, after this all happened, he couldn't drink. It took him a week to be able to physically handle alcohol. 

He's even said that this time, he thought about just eating the emotions and not feeling anything, like he usually does. This time, he said 'eh, better not' and has actually been going through the sadness and letting himself heal. The fact that she's been a total B to him and not leaving him alone has been extra difficult. I just don't know how he'll handle the blow of her getting back with her ex and parading it around facebook. 

He might actually admit to needing help this time and maybe go see a counselor now that he's actually letting himself feel this one through. I hope he does, but I'm not close physically to him to try and help him day to day. It's just horrible. We all loved her, and them together.