I had to go to a funeral on Friday for my cousin's son. He was 20 years old and he killed himself. I actually didn't know him very well at all. He was taken away from my cousin when he was 5 years old. He became a ward of the state and was institutionalized until he was 18. He had major emotional and behavioral issues and was considered mentally disabled. He killed himself while he was in jail.
Now my cousin, his mother, has been a hard core drug addict for the last 25 years. I believe that her son had these issues because she drank and used throughout her pregnancy. I haven't even seen her in 6 or 7 years. She lives in a legit crack house.
She didn't show up to her son's funeral. Her mother and father (my dad's brother), while not surprised, were both heartbroken. It was really hard to watch my family go through this. And I feel like my cousin is not far behind, if you know what I mean. My cousin, her sister, said that to me at the funeral too.
So, I've just been in a sad mood since then. And now I'm at work and my annoying co-worker is blathering on to me about the stupidest shit and I just want to scream in her face, " I don't fucking care!" My head in just not in it today.
Anyway, thank you for letting me vent.