Asking Dad to wear Mum's tartan?

MuttiSigyn

My FI and I are paying for our BM/GM/GWs outfits, and the GM and GW are wearing my FI's tartan, and my BMs are wearing my tartan. I would like everybody that is going to be in our pictures are either wearing my FI's tartan or my tartan. However, my problem is that my parents are divorced, and have different surnames and therefore different tartans (I have my mother's). I want to ask my Dad to wear my tartan, as he will obviously be in the wedding photos, so that he doesn't look completely out of place since not only are the tartans no the same pattern, they are not the same colour, but I'm not sure how to go about this. It means a lot to me that he still looks part of MY family, and not just some random stranger, but I still don't think it will go down well.

What would be the best way, do you think, of asking my dad to essentially wear something that basically brands him as my mother's family when, I assume, his brothers (who are not in the wedding photos) will be wearing his own tartan?

LondonLisa

Every Scottish wedding I have been to that has had kilts has had everyone wear their respective family's tartan. That is the point of it, to wear it of your family name. I don't think it would look strange at all to have people in different tartans. 

I would just leave it and have your Dad wear what he wants to wear. 

emmyg65

LondonLisa said:

Every Scottish wedding I have been to that has had kilts has had everyone wear their respective family's tartan. That is the point of it, to wear it of your family name. I don't think it would look strange at all to have people in different tartans. 

I would just leave it and have your Dad wear what he wants to wear. 

This. Technically, your dad can wear whatever he wants because he's not part of the wedding party. 

STARMOON44

You shouldn't. Tartans aren't worn to look pretty in your photos, they are worn as a traditional family symbol. No one will look at your wedding photos and think " different tartan? Must be a wedding crasher". Don't drive a wedge in between you and your father for photos.

doeydo

You want to ask your dad to wear the tartan that comes from your mother's side of the family (his ex-wife)?  That seems off to me.  Did your parents or yourself choose for you to have your mom's tartan instead of your dad's?  Also, here is a picture of everyone wearing their own tartan at a wedding (doesn't look weird to me):

& here is a matchy-matchy wedding party:

AddieCake

Yeah, I wouldn't try to force him to wear the tartan that isn't for his family.

CMGragain

Wearing the wrong tartan is a Scottish faux pas.

Dignity100

If your dad has a family tartan, why not incorporate his tartan into something of yours (like wrap your bouquet with it).

Lowell14

I would let each family wear their own tartan. Does your dad want to wear a tartan to begin with? (Irrespective of who's tartan he wears) if yes, then mom and you wear hers, FI etc wear his and dad and his family wear theirs

Lowell14

Also, I REALLY didn't like 'matchy-matchy' tartan photo. just...no...

artbyallie

Lowell14 said:

Also, I REALLY didn't like 'matchy-matchy' tartan photo. just...no...

Same here, it screams 'costume,' which is kinda offensive when it's a cultural symbol.

[Deleted User]

doeydo said:

You want to ask your dad to wear the tartan that comes from your mother's side of the family (his ex-wife)?  That seems off to me.  Did your parents or yourself choose for you to have your mom's tartan instead of your dad's?  Also, here is a picture of everyone wearing their own tartan at a wedding (doesn't look weird to me):

& here is a matchy-matchy wedding party:

I like this picture, I think it's a perfect example that different tartans go well together and that dad won't stand out because he will be in the same look (in a tartan) that everyone else will be wearing. I think you should let dad wear his family's tartan out of respect to his family.