How should I phrase this?

ElcaB

I'm getting my hair done for the wedding and want to offer my stylist's services to my BMs. They can choose to have their hair done by my stylist or their own, or do it themselves. I'm leaving it completely up to them, but if they choose to get it done I will not be paying for it. I'd like to ask them if they'd like my stylist to do their hair for the wedding, if they'd like, since she'll already be onsite to do mine.

How should I phrase this so they understand they'll be paying for their own hair if they choose to have it done by my stylist?

ETA: Words are hard. 

AprilH81

Hey girls!  Please let me know if you want to get your hair styled professionally on the day of the wedding.  The cost is "X" plus tip.  I want to confirm our appointments so please let me know by Friday.

JMalettas

 Ditto! That's pretty much what I did as well. (All of my girls ended up having it done too). 

 *J

JCbride2015

AprilH81 said:

Hey girls!  Please let me know if you want to get your hair styled professionally by [MyStylist], who will be at [Venue] on the day of the wedding.  The cost is "X" plus tip.  I want to confirm our appointments so please let me know by Friday.  Feel free to choose another stylist or do your own hair, just thought I'd give you [Mystylist's] info if you want to use her.

grumbledore

Yeah, just stress that it is if they WANT to and it's fine. "If you want to get it done, no pressure, it's fine either way."

cupcait927

AprilH81 said:

Hey girls!  Please let me know if you want to get your hair styled professionally by [MyStylist], who will be at [Venue] on the day of the wedding.  The cost is "X" plus tip.  I want to confirm our appointments so please let me know by Friday.  Feel free to choose another stylist or do your own hair, just thought I'd give you [Mystylist's] info if you want to use her.

This ^^ My BFF wanted all of her maids to get their hair done by her stylist and have us all hang out with her while that was going on. I had no idea until the end of the appointment that we were responsible for payment, not the bride. So I spent $50 on a hairstyle that I hated and would've rather just done it myself.

phira

"Hi [Name]! I am having my hair done at [location] at [time] on the day of the wedding. If you're interested in having your hair done with me, the salon charges [X] for updo-type styles and [Y] for a wash and blow-dry style. You are absolutely NOT obligated to have your hair done at this salon, nor are you obligated to have it professionally done at all. I just wanted to give you the heads up in case you were interested. Shoot me an email or text by [date] to let me know!"

I wouldn't send a mass email because it might be harder for one person to say no if other people have replied-all and said yes.

JMalettas

ckel24 said:

AprilH81 said:

Hey girls!  Please let me know if you want to get your hair styled professionally by [MyStylist], who will be at [Venue] on the day of the wedding.  The cost is "X" plus tip.  I want to confirm our appointments so please let me know by Friday.  Feel free to choose another stylist or do your own hair, just thought I'd give you [Mystylist's] info if you want to use her.

This ^^ My BFF wanted all of her maids to get their hair done by her stylist and have us all hang out with her while that was going on. I had no idea until the end of the appointment that we were responsible for payment, not the bride. So I spent $50 on a hairstyle that I hated and would've rather just done it myself.

 Ugh that would have sucked! I can't believe she never mentioned payment, then just expected you to pay! There's definitely nothing wrong with doing your own hair, or paying to have someone do it, but it's nice to have the heads up! At the same time, if it had been me, & payment was never mentioned, I would have just been like, 'Oh okay, how much do I need to pay?' Just to verify either way, so there was no surprise. Having been a bride before, I'm surprised she didn't say anything. 

 *J

phira

I've made it totally clear that no one's obligated to get ready with me, and that I probably can't pay for people's hair and make-up. However, I mostly feel bad because I've been "taking away" a lot of traditional stuff from my mom and bridesmaids (no bridal shower, went dress shopping with my partner), so I felt like it would have been rude of me to not offer.

One bridesmaid doesn't want to abandon her boyfriend for the whole day and doesn't want to have to come into the city and then go to the venue (about 2 hours of travel). My mom also just wants to go straight to the venue, and wants to use her own stylist for hair.

I'm going to try to gauge the interest of my maid of honor and my last bridesmaid, because honestly, I might just offer to pay if it's just the three of us.

smalfrie19

I told my girls to let me know if they wanted me to make appointments alongside mine if they wanted to get their hair done. But I let them know it wasn't necessary.